Guru

[NotWise]

I was amused today to realize that the forum rules made me a "Literotica Guru." I think that was something about the number of confused and unenlightened posts I've made. That gave me a belly laugh.

What I've learned since September:

Don't argue. You might win but no-one will care (okay, so that's not a new lesson, it's just been reinforced).

Umm... There's other stuff, like being careful about what you say to the Brits because it might be misunderstood.

I've learned surprisingly little about writing, which I thought was the reason I came here. Perhaps I've learned more about writing for Literotica but there's a limited value in that.

And I've learned about myself. Not a lot -- I'm too old for that -- but some.

What have you learned?

 

[Hypoxia]

Gee, you ARE you!

But I digress. That "don't argue" bit reflects this truism: INTERNET ARGUMENTS ARE LIKE THE SPECIAL OLYMPICS. EVEN IF YOU WIN, YOU'RE STILL A RETARD.

What have I learned since starting writing fiction on LIT about 2.5 years ago? That's hard to qualify. Let's see: My old songwriting and tech-writing skills needed considerable updating for fiction. Readers don't like overly-cute language. Titles / descriptions and category placement are important. In Incest, success is a motherfucker. And even though I write to grab eyeballs and affect people, I write for my own pleasure, not theirs.

 

[TxRad]

I was amused today to realize that the forum rules made me a "Literotica Guru." I think that was something about the number of confused and unenlightened posts I've made. That gave me a belly laugh.

What I've learned since September:

Don't argue. You might win but no-one will care (okay, so that's not a new lesson, it's just been reinforced).

Umm... There's other stuff, like being careful about what you say to the Brits because it might be misunderstood.

I've learned surprisingly little about writing, which I thought was the reason I came here. Perhaps I've learned more about writing for Literotica but there's a limited value in that.

And I've learned about myself. Not a lot -- I'm too old for that -- but some.

What have you learned?

In another year or two, go back and read your first story. Compare it to the latest story. Then and only then will you see what you have actually learned.

 

[LadyVer]

I've learned that I would love to write, but I have ADD, which unfortunately hasn't improved with age. I'm thinking I just haven't come up with a system yet that makes it easier for me to write. I'm really great with organizing in a work environment, but when it comes to more abstract issues, it's harder to come up with a system that works.

 

[_Lynn_]

I was amused today to realize that the forum rules made me a "Literotica Guru." I think that was something about the number of confused and unenlightened posts I've made. That gave me a belly laugh.

What I've learned since September:

Don't argue. You might win but no-one will care (okay, so that's not a new lesson, it's just been reinforced).

Umm... There's other stuff, like being careful about what you say to the Brits because it might be misunderstood.

I've learned surprisingly little about writing, which I thought was the reason I came here. Perhaps I've learned more about writing for Literotica but there's a limited value in that.

And I've learned about myself. Not a lot -- I'm too old for that -- but some.

What have you learned?

I've learned both that I can write, and how to write.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

As a child I learned I'm the dummest person on Earth, and no one has ever proven me wrong about this or even challenged my thesis. I've never met anyone dummer than me. But I accomplish much with my pitiful mind and I'm rarely embarrassed about being wrong. I learn lots from errors and failures. Occasionally my wrongs expose errors the best minds made. Generally speaking right is conditional not absolute.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

I've learned...

Loving Wives is a crap shoot...

Incest sells...

I will not write GM...no matter how well it might sell...

Most other categories aren't important to most readers...

You don't have to be a great writer to sell books...(ie. 50 Shades)...

I have all the skills I need to fuck it up really good.

 

[Handley_Page]

I was amused today to realize that the forum rules made me a "Literotica Guru." I think that was something about the number of confused and unenlightened posts I've made. That gave me a belly laugh.
What I've learned since September:

Umm... There's other stuff, like being careful about what you say to the Brits because it might be misunderstood.

If you write in "shorthand", ie., that language which you assume is understood, but very contextual, you may well be misunderstood.
However, if you write clearly, all will understand it, including we Brits.

 

[legerdemer]

Let's see... my tongue in cheek answer is here.

My actual answer is two-fold:

I have learned more about writing fiction since coming here - I hadn't written much fiction before, and it was a long time ago. I learned what I have by reading authors on here I admire and emulating some things I saw them do. Others I admire but know I either couldn't do what they do or don't want to, it's not "me." I've learned about and have practiced writing poetry, which I hadn't tried since my teens.

I have learned that there are quite a number of interesting folks hanging out in the unlikeliest of places: what a bunch of fascinating pervs some of you are! Glad to know ya.

And I learned some about myself, but that lies well in TMI territory.

 

[Handley_Page]

I've learned both that I can write, and how to write.

Were anyone daft enough to think that you cannot, I will stand in your corner and defend you.

 

[loquere]

I've learned...

Loving Wives is a crap shoot...

Incest sells...

I will not write GM...no matter how well it might sell...

Most other categories aren't important to most readers...

You don't have to be a great writer to sell books...(ie. 50 Shades)...

I have all the skills I need to fuck it up really good.

There's still a specific formula to writing good incest, I think romance is the favorite incest theme. A successful Loving wives tale is just really light hate speech. In Loving Wives you don't even need sex, just vengeance.

 

[lovecraft68]

some things I've learned at lit by category

Non human-if you stick a third eye or horn on an animal it's not bestiality.

Sci Fi-you can't write here unless you plan on writing a five year long series.

BDSM-

A-Only men are dominant.

B-no matter how strong willed a woman is she will always seek her submissive side.

C-Rape is considered BDSM

Non consent. Despite what it means to 99.99% of the world non consensual sex does not mean rape because lit does not allow rape.

Interracial.

A Despite endless possible combinations it seems 98% of interracial sex is black man white woman

B-all white women regardless of age and marital status all turn into drooling cock whores near a black man.

C-All black men in lit stories are ignorant racist sterotyped thugs who demean women and hate white men.

Incest- The biggest taboo, that one line we are all raised to believe can never be crossed, is out the window the second one relative sees the other naked.

Group sex. The only way a shy timid wall flower of a girl can lose her virginity is in a gang bang.

Gay male. Every straight man wants to suck cock, every single fucking man in the world secretly wants to be gay.

Lesbian all Lesbians really do look like porn stars.

Mature. All older women also look like porn stars, all older men either work construction or live at the gym because they take off their shirt and damn Saggy boobs, love handles pattern baldness, beer guts, all check at the door here where 45 is the new 25

Mind control- it seems the world is wrong, having sex with someone drugged or otherwise rendered not in their right mind is not rape or non consent.

Loving wives, all women are whores, all men who like to see their wife with another man is a limp wristed faggot, black men are niggers and all authors are also faggots and niggers and should be killed. That and the readers are very skilled, its a feat to type with hooves.

Humor and satire....is lost on the readers.

Celebrity....NO YOU CANNOT AGE AN UNDER AGE CHARACTER IN A CELEB STORY STOP ASKING!

Fetish, all women are dominant here and all men limp wristed faggots for letting them be and being man enough to admit whatever kink they have.

Romance. Hea mother fucker, or die!

Novels and Novellas...I see no reason for this category

Non erotic-The reason I see no reason for Novels and Novellas.

Erotic couplings, non kink specific basic porn or stories with too many kinks to classify go here.

Chain stories....Not BDSM

Toys and masturbation. they can go fuck themselves for all I care.

Voyeur/Exhibition. These people can go watch the others go fuck themselves for all I care.

There's more, but I have ADD.

 

[loquere]

Some of this was really really really funny. I should read your stories.

some things I've learned at lit by category

Non human-if you stick a third eye or horn on an animal it's not bestiality.

Sci Fi-you can't write here unless you plan on writing a five year long series.

BDSM-

A-Only men are dominant.

B-no matter how strong willed a woman is she will always seek her submissive side.

C-Rape is considered BDSM

Non consent. Despite what it means to 99.99% of the world non consensual sex does not mean rape because lit does not allow rape.

Interracial.

A Despite endless possible combinations it seems 98% of interracial sex is black man white woman

B-all white women regardless of age and marital status all turn into drooling cock whores near a black man.

C-All black men in lit stories are ignorant racist sterotyped thugs who demean women and hate white men.

Incest- The biggest taboo, that one line we are all raised to believe can never be crossed, is out the window the second one relative sees the other naked.

Group sex. The only way a shy timid wall flower of a girl can lose her virginity is in a gang bang.

Gay male. Every straight man wants to suck cock, every single fucking man in the world secretly wants to be gay.

Lesbian all Lesbians really do look like porn stars.

Mature. All older women also look like porn stars, all older men either work construction or live at the gym because they take off their shirt and damn Saggy boobs, love handles pattern baldness, beer guts, all check at the door here where 45 is the new 25

Mind control- it seems the world is wrong, having sex with someone drugged or otherwise rendered not in their right mind is not rape or non consent.

Loving wives, all women are whores, all men who like to see their wife with another man is a limp wristed faggot, black men are niggers and all authors are also faggots and niggers and should be killed. That and the readers are very skilled, its a feat to type with hooves.

Humor and satire....is lost on the readers.

Celebrity....NO YOU CANNOT AGE AN UNDER AGE CHARACTER IN A CELEB STORY STOP ASKING!

Fetish, all women are dominant here and all men limp wristed faggots for letting them be and being man enough to admit whatever kink they have.

Romance. Hea mother fucker, or die!

Novels and Novellas...I see no reason for this category

Non erotic-The reason I see no reason for Novels and Novellas.

Erotic couplings, non kink specific basic porn or stories with too many kinks to classify go here.

Chain stories....Not BDSM

Toys and masturbation. they can go fuck themselves for all I care.

Voyeur/Exhibition. These people can go watch the others go fuck themselves for all I care.

There's more, but I have ADD.

 

[_Lynn_]

Were anyone daft enough to think that you cannot, I will stand in your corner and defend you.

Thank you, HP. Always good to have someone in my corner.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

There's still a specific formula to writing good incest, I think romance is the favorite incest theme. A successful Loving wives tale is just really light hate speech. In Loving Wives you don't even need sex, just vengeance.

The only formula you need for incest is mother and son...they fuck each other until they pass out from exhaustion, sleep, then do it again.

 

[legerdemer]

When's your How To coming out?

some things I've learned at lit by category

Non human-if you stick a third eye or horn on an animal it's not bestiality.

Sci Fi-you can't write here unless you plan on writing a five year long series.

BDSM-

A-Only men are dominant.

B-no matter how strong willed a woman is she will always seek her submissive side.

C-Rape is considered BDSM

Non consent. Despite what it means to 99.99% of the world non consensual sex does not mean rape because lit does not allow rape.

Interracial.

A Despite endless possible combinations it seems 98% of interracial sex is black man white woman

B-all white women regardless of age and marital status all turn into drooling cock whores near a black man.

C-All black men in lit stories are ignorant racist sterotyped thugs who demean women and hate white men.

Incest- The biggest taboo, that one line we are all raised to believe can never be crossed, is out the window the second one relative sees the other naked.

Group sex. The only way a shy timid wall flower of a girl can lose her virginity is in a gang bang.

Gay male. Every straight man wants to suck cock, every single fucking man in the world secretly wants to be gay.

Lesbian all Lesbians really do look like porn stars.

Mature. All older women also look like porn stars, all older men either work construction or live at the gym because they take off their shirt and damn Saggy boobs, love handles pattern baldness, beer guts, all check at the door here where 45 is the new 25

Mind control- it seems the world is wrong, having sex with someone drugged or otherwise rendered not in their right mind is not rape or non consent.

Loving wives, all women are whores, all men who like to see their wife with another man is a limp wristed faggot, black men are niggers and all authors are also faggots and niggers and should be killed. That and the readers are very skilled, its a feat to type with hooves.

Humor and satire....is lost on the readers.

Celebrity....NO YOU CANNOT AGE AN UNDER AGE CHARACTER IN A CELEB STORY STOP ASKING!

Fetish, all women are dominant here and all men limp wristed faggots for letting them be and being man enough to admit whatever kink they have.

Romance. Hea mother fucker, or die!

Novels and Novellas...I see no reason for this category

Non erotic-The reason I see no reason for Novels and Novellas.

Erotic couplings, non kink specific basic porn or stories with too many kinks to classify go here.

Chain stories....Not BDSM

Toys and masturbation. they can go fuck themselves for all I care.

Voyeur/Exhibition. These people can go watch the others go fuck themselves for all I care.

There's more, but I have ADD.

 

[lovecraft68]

The only formula you need for incest is mother and son...they fuck each other until they pass out from exhaustion, sleep, then do it again.

no and yes.

Two factions in incest, the ones you just described and the ones Loquere mentioned, the ones who like romance.

Big audience for stroke and one for depth. I write mostly depth and last summer did a pure stroke. Got some new readers on it, but many regulars were like "Hope you got this out of your system.

 

[lovecraft68]

When's your How To coming out?

When the sandals in your AV come off

 

[NOIRTRASH]

I learned nothing about writing at LIT because I read few stories posted to LIT. LIT fare tends to be inferior to other sites.

That said, many excellent writers wrote tons of bad prose on the road to good prose, and a few went from good to bad....Robert Crais, Stephen King, Michael Connelly, and Max Allan Collins come to mind. Rule of Thumb: Stop after book #5. Boons are better when the purse, belly, and ego are empty. Rule of Thumb #2: When you know youre really good you've lost it. Certainty is the kiss of death for writers.

 

[lovecraft68]

Because someone asked very nicely

First time-Every body and I mean everybody is a virgin until they are 18, in fact they never even thought about sex, not even at 17 364 days 23 hours and 59 minutes old.

Anal-doesn't warrant its own category, you can find assholes anywhere on lit, especially the boards.

Erotic Horror- Only popular once a year when a bunch of people put the suck in succubi because all they know about them is its a demon with tits.

How To- a polite way of saying its my way or the highway, write like me.

Illustrated-I have yet to draw any conclusions about this category.

Letters and Transcripts. IT's 2016 who the hell writes letters? Soon to be changed to E-mails and Tweets.

Non English-most of the stories that fall under this do so unintentionally

Reviews and Essays-All you need to know is there's under 1200 entries in this category, its not worth anything clever.

Text with audio- You have to be quiet when you read this or they will hear you cumming.

Transsexuals and Cross Dressers- "Erotic tales of Jenner, I mean gender, bending."

Poems...a small inbred community who reads all each other's stuff because no one else does.

 

[TxRad]

James never wrote anything before he got here and has learned everything he knows right here on Lit. Don't let him kid you, he's one of our most improved students here at Lit.

 

[NotWise]

Anal-doesn't warrant its own category, you can find assholes anywhere on lit, especially the boards.

Okay, but you probably wouldn't want to stick your dick in'em.

Non English-most of the stories that fall under this do so unintentionally

Made me laugh, like some from you're earlier post.

Reviews and Essays-All you need to know is there's under 1200 entries in this category, its not worth anything clever.

Wait, don't you have something in there? Actually I think a lot of new writers could stand to read in that category.

 

[lovecraft68]

Okay, but you probably wouldn't want to stick your dick in'em.


Made me laugh, like some from you're earlier post.


Wait, don't you have something in there? Actually I think a lot of new writers could stand to read in that category.

I don't have anything there. I have a How to where I tell you how to write incest my way.

 

[NotWise]

Ahh. That's what I was thinking of. Mer's piece on location as a character might be in Reviews and Essays.

 

[sr71plt]

Letters and Transcripts. IT's 2016 who the hell writes letters? Soon to be changed to E-mails and Tweets.

Got you on this one, I think. There ain't nothin' around here that's gonna change "soon."