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Aye, laddy, 'tis indeed the grandest of sports. Says the woman who's little bro bores her to tears with golf tales. 
I do enjoy playing it, though. We have many very good golf courses around us and I get out my clubs when I can. My brother is very good; plays off a 2 handicap. He taught me all I know.
Can't say I've ever dressed like a pimp, at least not on the golf course.
A squirrel ran off with one of my golf balls once. Seriously!
Lou
P.S. My pleasure, babe.
I do enjoy playing it, though. We have many very good golf courses around us and I get out my clubs when I can. My brother is very good; plays off a 2 handicap. He taught me all I know.
Can't say I've ever dressed like a pimp, at least not on the golf course.
A squirrel ran off with one of my golf balls once. Seriously!
Lou
P.S. My pleasure, babe.
pop_54
The young Aviator LOL
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2003
- Posts
- 6,893
Highly amusing mate... change to see him acting natural
Oh Golf... bloody good waste of space... This actually reminds me of a joke a friend sent me recently.
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: (with a hurtful look on her face.) "You would?
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: (silence)
HUSBAND: "Shit."
pops......
Oh Golf... bloody good waste of space... This actually reminds me of a joke a friend sent me recently.
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: (with a hurtful look on her face.) "You would?
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: (silence)
HUSBAND: "Shit."
pops......
matriarch
Rotund retiree
- Joined
- May 25, 2003
- Posts
- 22,743
pop_54 said:Highly amusing mate... change to see him acting natural
Oh Golf... bloody good waste of space... This actually reminds me of a joke a friend sent me recently.
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"
WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: (with a hurtful look on her face.) "You would?
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."
WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"
HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: (silence)
HUSBAND: "Shit."
pops......
ROFLMAO
Wonderful Pops.
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I would pay good money to hear a conversation 'twixt Pops and Robin Williams.
Perdita
Perdita
OldnotDead
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jul 22, 2002
- Posts
- 498
I play very rarely, as well. Usually a few charity tournaments.
As an adolescent, I enjoyed playing with my Dad. I learned a lot and like to think I made him a better golfer
If I play more now, it will be to spend the same kind of time with my growing children. Where else can you talk to them for four hours and they cannot slam doors or stomp off?
Pop's, I thought I knew most of the oldie but goodie golf jokes. THANKS!!! Always appreciate a new one.
As an adolescent, I enjoyed playing with my Dad. I learned a lot and like to think I made him a better golfer
If I play more now, it will be to spend the same kind of time with my growing children. Where else can you talk to them for four hours and they cannot slam doors or stomp off?
Pop's, I thought I knew most of the oldie but goodie golf jokes. THANKS!!! Always appreciate a new one.
G
Guest
Guest
Here's an amusing (if a little tenuous) golf related story...
I was just on the phone with my Dad, he just had to tell me this. He takes his dog, Jade, for a walk over our local golf course every day. It is a public park and golfers and dog walkers alike get on well. Anyway, that has little to do with things.
He walked Jade around the usual way they go, but she veered off to the bushes. He called her and called her, but she wouldn't come back. Dad went to see what was up with her and, when he bent down to look under the bushes, his immediate thought was that she'd found a body. But, there were too many arms and legs. It was a young couple "at it", in his words. He was snickering as he told me.
He then left them to it and walked on a little way. He met and old lady (in her seventies) walking in the opposite direction with her dog. He told her to watch out, because there was a couple "at it" in the bushes. He told me she went off giggling, saying, "Oooh, I must go and have a look!" LOL!
Dad told me when he walked back around again and the young couple were sat at the edge of the bushes, completely naked, obviously knackered. I bet he got a good look, the perve. My Dad is great!
Lou
P.S. I'm just glad it wasn't me. I know where not to go now.
I was just on the phone with my Dad, he just had to tell me this. He takes his dog, Jade, for a walk over our local golf course every day. It is a public park and golfers and dog walkers alike get on well. Anyway, that has little to do with things.
He walked Jade around the usual way they go, but she veered off to the bushes. He called her and called her, but she wouldn't come back. Dad went to see what was up with her and, when he bent down to look under the bushes, his immediate thought was that she'd found a body. But, there were too many arms and legs. It was a young couple "at it", in his words. He was snickering as he told me.
He then left them to it and walked on a little way. He met and old lady (in her seventies) walking in the opposite direction with her dog. He told her to watch out, because there was a couple "at it" in the bushes. He told me she went off giggling, saying, "Oooh, I must go and have a look!" LOL!
Dad told me when he walked back around again and the young couple were sat at the edge of the bushes, completely naked, obviously knackered. I bet he got a good look, the perve. My Dad is great!
Lou
P.S. I'm just glad it wasn't me. I know where not to go now.
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pop_54 said:Highly amusing mate... change to see him acting natural
HUSBAND: "Shit."
pops......
PMSL.. ah pops, ya sexy beastie.. a very good morning laugh..
thank you babe.
Weird Harold
Opinionated Old Fart
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2000
- Posts
- 23,768
OldnotDead said:
I've only played "Cow Pasture Pool" once, and don't see what all of the fuss is about shooting in the sixties or seventies. I shot a seventy-one the one and only time I've played.
Someday I may even go back and play a second hole.
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Guest
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Must have been early in his act, only on his seconf=d bottle of water and his shirt still looked dry. Three things always amazed me about Mr Williams:
1. His comedic genius
2. the incredible amount of sweat he produced on stage
3. the 5 gallons of water he drank in the process
1. His comedic genius
2. the incredible amount of sweat he produced on stage
3. the 5 gallons of water he drank in the process
Lisa Denton
Can nipples explode?
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2004
- Posts
- 7,758
Golf is a spectator sport.
RobertEdwardLee
Virgin
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2004
- Posts
- 13
Lisa,
so is fishing
so is fishing
SlickTony
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 25, 2002
- Posts
- 6,344
I married into what used to be a golfing family. My ILs belonged to the country club in Pasadena, TX and they played just about every day. My husband, too--in fact, he'd been on the golf team in HS and played while in college, too. He used to be a scratch player, and was good enough so that he once had aspirations of getting on the pro circuit. However, he never could quite cross that line between the really good and the great, so he gave up. It took him many years to get it out of his system. He sometimes remarked, with slight bitterness, that he wished he'd been born as a Bay Area housewife; then he could go out and play every day for fun and not care about it so intensely.
Now, he's into tennis. He is a USTA-rated 3.0 and he's having a lot of fun with it. Tennis is much cheaper than golf, and it's still exercise. The PGA says that you have to walk the course, and there was that guy, I forget what his name is--Casey somebody? Casey Martin? who has something wrong with his legs and had to fight for the right to use a cart, but if you aren't involved in PGA competitions, anywhere you play, anymore, forces you to use a cart.
I think it was Shaw who said that golf just ruined a good walk.
Now, he's into tennis. He is a USTA-rated 3.0 and he's having a lot of fun with it. Tennis is much cheaper than golf, and it's still exercise. The PGA says that you have to walk the course, and there was that guy, I forget what his name is--Casey somebody? Casey Martin? who has something wrong with his legs and had to fight for the right to use a cart, but if you aren't involved in PGA competitions, anywhere you play, anymore, forces you to use a cart.
I think it was Shaw who said that golf just ruined a good walk.
