Gag Thread II: things that choke you, but not in a good way

[shereads]

Today I bought a bag of fresh, juicy Washington cherries, so sweet and crispy I'd prefer them to candy even if they were bad for me.

I let them chill for a few hours while I finished some work. Then I gave in to my craving, dumped the bag of joy into a big glass bowl and

Ewwwww. GAG!​

found the seed some leprous creep at the supermarket had sucked clean and then dropped back in the bag. WTF, supermarket creep? Were you raised in a barn?

 

[Guest]

one the bright side, maybe he/she/it was allergic to the chemicals on the cherries and spent a wonderful evening at hospital.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Yuck, but better than half a worm

 

[Dar~]

I remember I was eating a Banquet TV dinner once (cheap broke food) and I ate all the meat, and the bread, and went to finish the peas and came eye to eye with the front half of a grasshopper.

I called the company to complain and they offered me coupons for more of their "High Quality" meals. Bleck!!!!!

 

[carsonshepherd]

I remember I was eating a Banquet TV dinner once (cheap broke food) and I ate all the meat, and the bread, and went to finish the peas and came eye to eye with the front half of a grasshopper.

I called the company to complain and they offered me coupons for more of their "High Quality" meals. Bleck!!!!!

Puke! i would've died *shudder*

*hates grasshoppers*

 

[Dar~]

Puke! i would've died *shudder*

*hates grasshoppers*

Well, for future reference, don't buy Banquet anything.*nods*

 

[carsonshepherd]

Well, for future reference, don't buy Banquet anything.*nods*

thanks, I won't, ever ever again!

 

[OhMissScarlett]

I found a nice big hairy insect leg in a jar of Hormel bacon bits not too long ago.

Suddenly, I decided Bacos seemed very sanitary.

 

[vogueboy]

I found a nice big hairy insect leg in a jar of Hormel bacon bits not too long ago.

Suddenly, I decided Bacos seemed very sanitary.

LOL

*agreeing*

 

[variable Xy]

i found a lonnnng blonde hair in my bk big fish burger, half chewed in my mouth the other stuck in the sandwich (covered with tarter sauce)

 

[carsonshepherd]

i found a lonnnng blonde hair in my bk big fish burger, half chewed in my mouth the other stuck in the sandwich (covered with tarter sauce)

*gag*

not short, black and curly though

 

[variable Xy]

*gag*

not short, black and curly though

no. i would've swallowed and not even noticed

 

[shereads]

Eating any food prepared by strangers is an act of faith. Read Kitchen Confidential if you think a Banquet dinner has a more questionable history than the chef's special at your favorite restaurant.

That grasshopper incident is still a gag-and-a-halfer, by any standard.

When I was a kid, I mixed myself a glass of Carnation Instant Breakfast while half-asleep, and almost drained the glass before I noticed that the undissolved powder at the bottom was squriming. I shrieked like a banshee. My parents woke up thinking I'd been attacked by a burglar.

This will be a good thread for dieting. I think I'll bookmark it.

Who else read Fast Food Nation?

 

[shereads]

LOL

*agreeing*

Great signature, vogueboy.

 

[4degrees]

no. i would've swallowed and not even noticed

what about short, blond and curly...

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Eating any food prepared by strangers is an act of faith. Read Kitchen Confidential if you think a Banquet dinner has a more questionable history than the chef's special at your favorite restaurant.

That grasshopper incident is still a gag-and-a-halfer, by any standard.

When I was a kid, I mixed myself a glass of Carnation Instant Breakfast while half-asleep, and almost drained the glass before I noticed that the undissolved powder at the bottom was squriming. I shrieked like a banshee. My parents woke up thinking I'd been attacked by a burglar.

This will be a good thread for dieting. I think I'll bookmark it.

Who else read Fast Food Nation?

*Scream*
I haven't read either of those books, but having worked in the hospitality industry for a long time, nothing surprises me.

When someone comes at me with a plate of food saying "Does this taste bad to you?" I just run the other way.

 

[TheEarl]

It's the universal conundrum. Why is it when someone gets a pint of off beer or a migy meal, they always insist that everyone else has to taste it as well. And what's more, we all do!

The Earl

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Today I bought a bag of fresh, juicy Washington cherries, so sweet and crispy I'd prefer them to candy even if they were bad for me.

I let them chill for a few hours while I finished some work. Then I gave in to my craving, dumped the bag of joy into a big glass bowl and

Ewwwww. GAG!​

found the seed some leprous creep at the supermarket had sucked clean and then dropped back in the bag. WTF, supermarket creep? Were you raised in a barn?

Notify store security immeditatly. This is obviously a retail theft gang infiltrating grocery stores. Check your pork chops carefully from now on.

 

[Guest]

It's the universal conundrum. Why is it when someone gets a pint of off beer or a migy meal, they always insist that everyone else has to taste it as well. And what's more, we all do!

The Earl

sweetie, i think your breasts are bigger than mine.

 

[AppleBiter]

Did I miss Gag Thread I?

 

[TheEarl]

sweetie, i think your breasts are bigger than mine.

<hurt> Where'd that come from?

The Earl

 

[Guest]

<hurt> Where'd that come from?

The Earl

never be hurt by me. i was merely searching my bathingsuit top for my boobs and grew envious. *sigh*

 

[TheEarl]

never be hurt by me. i was merely searching my bathingsuit top for my boobs and grew envious. *sigh*

For future reference, to admire a man's breasts is not complimentary!

The Earl

 

[ABSTRUSE]

never be hurt by me. i was merely searching my bathingsuit top for my boobs and grew envious. *sigh*

You lie, you don't wear a bathing suit top, you wear a speedo so people will think you're an adolescent boy.

 

[bridgeburner]

Men do not have breasts. They have chesticles.



I was actually just admiring the Earl's and contemplating how to fluff his ego.



Is this sufficient?



-B