PoliteSuccubus
Spinster Aunt of Lit
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2002
- Posts
- 8,093
We were talking the other day about "Friends With Benefits" and I thought I'd start a thread on it.
A "Friend with Benefits" is someone you have a friendship with and sometimes "de-stress" with sexually without the benefit of a higher form of commitment or exspectations.
Some simple rules are:
Don't make a friend exspecting benefits.
This is, basically, just another way to lie to someone to get sex. "I will pretend to be her/his friend because I want sex but I don't want commit to anything".
Don't forget to be a friend after getting benefits.
Which ties into:
Don't only call your friend when you want benefits
If you were friends frist and then you ignore that person after having sex with them, then things start getting awkward. Don't change your friendship rituals after having sex. If you always called them up and told them about a game/concert/sale/funny thing...still do. And don't exspect sex everytime you seen them from then on. Keep it casual. "If your bored later, I'm not doing anything and you can stop by." is a nice easy way of suggesting something.
Don't Blab
By telling other people you're getting benefits you are betraying the trust of your friend on many levels: As a friend, as a lover, and as a decent person. Plus, you might be putting them in the awkward postion of trying to explain why they don't give those benefits to other people.
Be nice
Say please, say thank you, and say that was just what I needed or that was good even if it wasn't. Your getting a gift of that persons time and body, react as such.
A "Friend with Benefits" is someone you have a friendship with and sometimes "de-stress" with sexually without the benefit of a higher form of commitment or exspectations.
Some simple rules are:
Don't make a friend exspecting benefits.
This is, basically, just another way to lie to someone to get sex. "I will pretend to be her/his friend because I want sex but I don't want commit to anything".
Don't forget to be a friend after getting benefits.
Which ties into:
Don't only call your friend when you want benefits
If you were friends frist and then you ignore that person after having sex with them, then things start getting awkward. Don't change your friendship rituals after having sex. If you always called them up and told them about a game/concert/sale/funny thing...still do. And don't exspect sex everytime you seen them from then on. Keep it casual. "If your bored later, I'm not doing anything and you can stop by." is a nice easy way of suggesting something.
Don't Blab
By telling other people you're getting benefits you are betraying the trust of your friend on many levels: As a friend, as a lover, and as a decent person. Plus, you might be putting them in the awkward postion of trying to explain why they don't give those benefits to other people.
Be nice
Say please, say thank you, and say that was just what I needed or that was good even if it wasn't. Your getting a gift of that persons time and body, react as such.
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