Forum Neighborhood Watch Program

[TonyClifton]

I created a "Neighborhood Watch" program for this forum yesterday.

Last night, while on patrol, I spotted a person wearing dark clothing perusing through various threads.

I approached him and asked, "What is your business here?"

He replied, "I'm just a visitor and thought that I would look around to see if I want to join this forum."

Not knowing what to do next, I messaged a senior member of this forum for advice.

They responded, "Is he eating Skittles and drinking Ice Tea?"

I messaged him back, "No, he is drinking a Shirley Temple."

The senior member replied, "Tell him that gay people are welcome here."

"Shirley Temple" from Wikipedia:
A Shirley Temple is a non-alcoholic mixed drink made with two parts Ginger ale, one part orange juice, and a splash of grenadine, garnished with a maraschino cherry.

 

[TonyClifton]

Airplane!

From the movie "Airplane!" (1980):

Rumack: Elaine, you're a member of this crew. Can you face some unpleasant facts?
Elaine Dickinson: No.

Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.

Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.

Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.

Elaine Dickinson: There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?

Rumack: Can you fly this plane, and land it?
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.

Rumack: What was it we had for dinner tonight?
Elaine Dickinson: Well, we had a choice of steak or fish.
Rumack: Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.

[From the author]

Did you notice how I smuggled in Shirley?