Flaming Mouse Story Doused

R. Richard

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Flaming Mouse Story Doused

Rumor Squashed: Flaming Mouse Didn't Start House Fire

FORT SUMNER, N.M. -- A small town rumor that sparked world wide interest about a mouse burning down a house has been found to be untrue.

After 81-year-old Chano Mares's house burned down Saturday in Fort Sumner, news services picked up the quirky story.

"Flaming Mouse Burns Down House" read the headline over an Associated Press story that appeared on TheNewMexicoChannel.com, for example.

According to the initial report, Mares threw the critter in a pile of burning leaves near his home, but it ran back to the house on fire.

A local firefighter said the mouse ran to just beneath a window and the flames spread up the window and throughout the house.

All contents of the home were destroyed, but no one was injured.

Interest in fires has been high lately. Unseasonably dry and windy conditions have charred more than 53,000 acres and destroyed 10 homes in southeastern New Mexico in recent weeks.

The mouse story, however, has been doused by Mares.

"It's really humorous more than anything that a mouse burned down the house," he told KOAT-TV. Thing is, the mouse was dead when it hit the burning leaves.

Mares said he trapped and killed the critter and tossed it on the fire.

The flames, he said, probably reached his house because they were driven by high winds.

Capt. Jim Lyssy of the Fort Sumner Fire Department said the rumor probably got started because there was "a little too much excitement" at the time of the fire.

Mares lost everything -- and has no insurance -- but the mouse story still makes him smile.

"I started laughing, and I'll be laughing from now on," he said. "It's silly."
 
Sorely disillusioned.

Briefly exulted in rodent karma,

Perdita ;)
 
My arse.

I'm betting money that the mouse story is true and he's just far too embarrassed about it.

The Earl
 
Samandiriel said:
Must resist making comments about her boinking Goofy.

Mickey Mouse is divorcing Minnie Mouse. The judge looks at the complaint and says, "Mr. Mouse, I can't grant you a divorce just because you think your wife is weird."

Mickey gets up and says, "Your Honor, I didn't say she was weird. I said she was fucking Goofy!"
 
perdita said:
Sorely disillusioned.

Briefly exulted in rodent karma,

Perdita ;)

Forgiveness begged in advance.... nonetheless:

There is a Darwin Awards [Urban Legand] story about an episode of felching gone horribly awry. It seems the gentleman with the cardboard tube up his ass gave the safe word that he'd had enough, and his partner attempted to remove the gerbil. The curious rodent was not immediately retrievable, and so the gentleman's partner flicked his lighter at the end of the tube to shed some light on the situation.

The rodent happened, at that moment, upon a trapped pocket of intestinal gas.

The resulting explosion singed the partner's eyebrow's and briefly ignited the hair products supporting his immaculate coif, while scorching the gentleman's rectum. [At this point, the story could veer into the well-known all-purpose punchline, "Wrecked 'im!? Damn near killed 'im!" However...] The unfortunate rodent was shot through the cardboard tube like a flaming ass-rocket, landed in the chiffon drapes, and ignited a conflagration, undoubtedly a divine retribution for this horrible rodent abuse.
 
Samandiriel said:
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!!

I hear he's offering Angelina and Brad prenatal tips.

They're going to share the ultrasound machine.
 
Huckleman2000 said:
Forgiveness begged in advance.... nonetheless:

There is a Darwin Awards [Urban Legand] story about an episode of felching gone horribly awry. It seems the gentleman with the cardboard tube up his ass gave the safe word that he'd had enough, and his partner attempted to remove the gerbil. The curious rodent was not immediately retrievable, and so the gentleman's partner flicked his lighter at the end of the tube to shed some light on the situation.

The rodent happened, at that moment, upon a trapped pocket of intestinal gas.

The resulting explosion singed the partner's eyebrow's and briefly ignited the hair products supporting his immaculate coif, while scorching the gentleman's rectum. [At this point, the story could veer into the well-known all-purpose punchline, "Wrecked 'im!? Damn near killed 'im!" However...] The unfortunate rodent was shot through the cardboard tube like a flaming ass-rocket, landed in the chiffon drapes, and ignited a conflagration, undoubtedly a divine retribution for this horrible rodent abuse.

*snicker*

:D
 
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