First time visit to a sex club

First off congratulations on taking the first step.

To give any good advice I would have to know what kind of club it is.

But in general every club we have ever been to was great, some of the most understanding and un judgemental people I have ever met.

I'm going to assume that you are bi since you mentioned couples if I'm mistaken my apologies. However if you are you will be considered a vip.

The first rule of swinging is No Means No and you should not feel pressured to do anything. I would suggest that on your first visit that you just hangout, dance, flirt and get comfortable with the club.

Along with that if there is booze take it easy, you want any decisions you make to be with a clear head.

If the event has a theme please participate also if there are any ice breaker games get involved with that too.

Feel free to PM me with any questions you don't feel like posting here.
 
Golden Compulsion made some very good points.

I would not worry at all about any feelings of being left out. From your post which I reread "looking for a woman or couple"

Single bi females are called Unicorns for a reason.

However I still recommend not playing on your first visit. It can all be very overwhelming and you should take the time to get comfortable.
 
Yes I'm bisexual. I've had a couple of threesomes but they were awhile ago. I would prefer something more ongoing with a couple but haven't found that situation yet. I would really like to explore more with women, but haven't had that many opportunities.
 
Yes I'm bisexual. I've had a couple of threesomes but they were awhile ago. I would prefer something more ongoing with a couple but haven't found that situation yet. I would really like to explore more with women, but haven't had that many opportunities.
Well you should have no issues meeting people, in fact you might just be overwhelmed. Like I said before single bi females are called Unicorns for a reason.

If you can tell us what kind of event you are going to we can give much better advice.
 
Okay I looked at their site. It's a on premises club so that means there will be sex happening.

If I were you I would stick with the just watch, dance, flirt scenario or if you think you are ready then just girl on girl the first time visiting. It really can very quickly become overwhelming.
 
colette's club, no idea what type of event yet

I've been there quite a few times and it's a nice club that I think you'll enjoy. I generally found the clientele to be upscale and friendly and never rude or pushy and the staff to be helpful, welcoming and accommodating. You might consider giving them a call or shooting them an email and tell them about yourself, what you're interested in and that it's your first time to visit this club or one like it. They will be more than happy to help out, perhaps suggest a preferred night for you to attend (i.e., I think they occasionally have "newbie" nights), and even possibly introduce you to other members they think might be a good match for you and just generally help put you at ease, being your first experience there.

And just go at your own pace, socialize and let things happen organically. It's not like everyone there just jumps into bed, too. There will be a varied group of folks from monogamous couples who only play with each other and/or enjoy the voyeuristic component to full-on swappers/swingers looking for other couples or singles and everything in between. The staff and customers pride themselves on providing a no-pressure environment in my experience. So just relax, be yourself and have fun, which I think you will. And it's okay to be nervous which should ease given time and experience, but just remember that everyone you see and/or interact with is at a lifestyle club too and also either are or have been at one time first-timers.

Let us know how it goes if you feel so inclined and feel free to post here or PM if you have any questions. Enjoy!!
 
I’ve been to a few sex clubs myself: twice to gay bathhouses and once to Collette’s. Each time, I’ve been amazed at how respectful everybody was, so I would encourage you to go. Just go with this understanding:

1) These establishments reject aggressive behavior, and you always have the right to say no. If somebody persists in unwelcome advances, take your complaint to the front desk. And if your complaint is ignored, leave the club.

2) Be sober and stay sober. You can always indulge later, after you’ve had that first experience.

3) Understand that you don’t have to have sex. There’s nothing wrong with just enjoying the show.

4) If you find the experience uncomfortable, go home. The admission price for a single woman is miniscule, so it’s not like you’ll have lost much.

5) Enjoy yourself, but do it on your own terms.
 
I've been there quite a few times and it's a nice club that I think you'll enjoy. I generally found the clientele to be upscale and friendly and never rude or pushy and the staff to be helpful, welcoming and accommodating. You might consider giving them a call or shooting them an email and tell them about yourself, what you're interested in and that it's your first time to visit this club or one like it. They will be more than happy to help out, perhaps suggest a preferred night for you to attend (i.e., I think they occasionally have "newbie" nights), and even possibly introduce you to other members they think might be a good match for you and just generally help put you at ease, being your first experience there.

And just go at your own pace, socialize and let things happen organically. It's not like everyone there just jumps into bed, too. There will be a varied group of folks from monogamous couples who only play with each other and/or enjoy the voyeuristic component to full-on swappers/swingers looking for other couples or singles and everything in between. The staff and customers pride themselves on providing a no-pressure environment in my experience. So just relax, be yourself and have fun, which I think you will. And it's okay to be nervous which should ease given time and experience, but just remember that everyone you see and/or interact with is at a lifestyle club too and also either are or have been at one time first-timers.

Let us know how it goes if you feel so inclined and feel free to post here or PM if you have any questions. Enjoy!!

I’ve been to a few sex clubs myself: twice to gay bathhouses and once to Collette’s. Each time, I’ve been amazed at how respectful everybody was, so I would encourage you to go. Just go with this understanding:

1) These establishments reject aggressive behavior, and you always have the right to say no. If somebody persists in unwelcome advances, take your complaint to the front desk. And if your complaint is ignored, leave the club.

2) Be sober and stay sober. You can always indulge later, after you’ve had that first experience.

3) Understand that you don’t have to have sex. There’s nothing wrong with just enjoying the show.

4) If you find the experience uncomfortable, go home. The admission price for a single woman is miniscule, so it’s not like you’ll have lost much.

5) Enjoy yourself, but do it on your own terms.
Both excellent replies!!
 
I’ve been to a few sex clubs myself: twice to gay bathhouses and once to Collette’s. Each time, I’ve been amazed at how respectful everybody was, so I would encourage you to go. Just go with this understanding:

1) These establishments reject aggressive behavior, and you always have the right to say no. If somebody persists in unwelcome advances, take your complaint to the front desk. And if your complaint is ignored, leave the club.

2) Be sober and stay sober. You can always indulge later, after you’ve had that first experience.

3) Understand that you don’t have to have sex. There’s nothing wrong with just enjoying the show.

4) If you find the experience uncomfortable, go home. The admission price for a single woman is miniscule, so it’s not like you’ll have lost much.

5) Enjoy yourself, but do it on your own terms.
This was very much the experience I had when I visited a Bath house.

I'd checked it out online and asked advice on another forum. I was assured that there was no pressure to partake in anything I didn't want to. It was absolutely fine just to watch. The guy at the front desk must have picked up on my nervousness, he told me to speak to a member of staff if I had any issues.

These things work if everyone follows the rules. It was a great experience, one which I would like to repeat.
 
I have always had the fantasy of sitting next to an appropriately Cumfy armchair and providing for the ladies a pussy fluff one after the other.
 
General advice to a single lady...

Safety first. Read the reviews of the club. Make sure it's a safe and welcoming environment (most are, some less so). Join Fabswingers or similar, you'll find plenty of honest reviews there. you may also find the couple(s) you're looking for that way.

Visit socials/munches (you'll find them via fabswingers or on fetlife); they're a good way to network safely and meet people with similar interests, and you may find experienced people into the club scene who are willing to take you along and introduce you. That's what happened to me, and I've done it for others. It's a lot easier to break the ice if you're with people you know than to show up on your own.

Be open to possibilities, but never be afraid to say no. Some places will give you a wristband if you want one that tells people you're not interested in playing.
 
Most have a new attendee orientation. Do not skip it. The leader goes over rules, explains all the features, and what happens in what areas.
My first club had a DJ and dance floor. I joined the topless electric slide and it was a great ice breaker.
I got to show a little, see a little, with zero pressure. I did a lot of watching. I had a small crossbody bag with essentials. Small hand sanitizer, single pack wipes, lube, pocket vibrator, condoms, etc.
Every place I have gone, condoms are required.
 
Most have a new attendee orientation. Do not skip it. The leader goes over rules, explains all the features, and what happens in what areas.
My first club had a DJ and dance floor. I joined the topless electric slide and it was a great ice breaker.
I got to show a little, see a little, with zero pressure. I did a lot of watching. I had a small crossbody bag with essentials. Small hand sanitizer, single pack wipes, lube, pocket vibrator, condoms, etc.
Every place I have gone, condoms are required.
Very practical advice.
 
Most have a new attendee orientation. Do not skip it. The leader goes over rules, explains all the features, and what happens in what areas.
My first club had a DJ and dance floor. I joined the topless electric slide and it was a great ice breaker.
I got to show a little, see a little, with zero pressure. I did a lot of watching. I had a small crossbody bag with essentials. Small hand sanitizer, single pack wipes, lube, pocket vibrator, condoms, etc.
Every place I have gone, condoms are required.
Where do you go?
 
My first place was on Rt 30 in Camden. It's closed.
The second was The Cottages not far from Gettysburg.

The third was a hotel party in Woodbridge.
 
I'm having a tough time going from "I'm nervous and shy" to "I want to go to a sex club." I'll take your word for it.

Go and watch. Put zero expectation into actually engaging anyone there. You're a woman so you're not going to be assumed to be a perv like a single guy and you have that going for you. But sex clubs are similar to real life: People don't just line up to fuck you. Couples, or singles, are discerning and looking for connection, even brief, emotionally or intellectually, beyond just pointing fingers and saying "Let's have some sex."

Walk in, watch and enjoy, and leave after 15 minutes. Make the goal 15 minutes and if you like what you see, stay longer. But sex clubs, at least the ones I've been to in the U.S., aren't like orgies from back-when. And if they were, I'd leave, that's not a good experience.
 
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