First Person Narrators who Break the Fourth Wall

[Deleted member 6666935]

I think I’ve done that once or twice in almost every story I’ve written, but writing in first person makes it easier.

 

[LilyWaters]

I want to try writing in a style where the narrator addresses the reader, breaks the fourth wall, and acknowledges they're telling a story.

Things like:







But it's intimidating. Even writing those examples above makes me uncomfortable. I feel like I'm doing it wrong.

Have you done anything in this style? Or have you read something that you liked? Smack them here! I want to read them. Snarky narrators especially.

General discussion of this technique also welcome, of course. Especially if you have nuggets of wisdom for a writer dipping her toe in.

One thing I'm struggling with is that it feels jarring whenever I break the fourth wall. Like, I feel like I need to do it enough that it's not weird. But if you do it too much, it's kind of tedious, no?

Note: I think maybe I'm describing "metafiction" here? I know metafiction does a lot of fourth wall breaking and I-know-I'm-in-a-story. But I think also it's associated with narratives that are about the nature of narrative--which is not necessarily what I'm going for. Someone with an English degree can probably set me straight.

This is actually pretty common. Many classics do this with varying degrees of subtlety: Nick in The Great Gatsby, Vonnegut in Slaughterhouse Five, Celie in The Color Purple, etc. In fact, you could argue that MOST first-person narrators are acknowledging some kind of reader, as they are telling their story to SOMEBODY as they move through their lives.

Given the sentences you've described, I don't think it would be jarring to sprinkle a few instances of direct address into your work and see how it sits with you. And no, I don't think you need it too much at all. I would argue that some of the best writing - like the examples I have described above - draws the reader into the action so that they FORGET it's a direct address between instances. That could be personal preference, but... I don't think you need to be constantly reminding the reader about it.

Try it out! Have some fun! See what sticks.

 

[SimonDoom]

I’m not suggesting the author should be talking directly to the reader in every paragraph. But the author can move the point of view in and out for valuable effect. I think calling this change in POV a wall is the wrong metaphor. It’s more of a bridge, or maybe an FPV drone the author pilots. Let’s take as an example one of OP’s lines:



Here are ways to move in steps from all the way in the scene to the OP’s line:









Or we could move even further out:




Okay, I had fun with that last example and laid it on pretty thick. But I don’t see a barrier here, I see a continuum. A few tweaks could move any of those lines closer or further away from the action. And do for the story whatever the author wants.

I agree it's a continuum and I like your examples. I'd say your last example is a good example of what NOT to do unless you are striving for a comic effect and trying to sound 19th century.

 

[Belegon]

Caught myself doing this in a slightly disguised manner. It's internal to my male lead...

A momentary thought about how unlikely this was crossed my brain, but I quickly pushed that aside. The last thing I wanted to show at this point was anything that could be interpreted as hesitation.

my intent (the authors, not the characters ) was pretty clearly to say to the audience, "okay, I know this is moving pretty fast in their situation, but come on this ride with me. Suspend that disbelief..."

 

[bestkeptsecret678]

Snarky, did you say?

Perfect story for you then. May I present Elves Gone Wild.

Short, and filled with all the debauchery and snark you can handle.

https://literotica.com/s/elves-gone-wild

I Am no expert here, but if one’s crossing abruptly into the audience’s lap, then the snarkier the better.

 

[Voboy]

I do this sparingly, though I don't shy away from it.

As has been said, the Fourth Wall isn't really a "thing" in FP. That said, there are some narrators for whom this kind of aside would be natural and organic, and others for whom it wouldn't.

 

[OffNSFW]

Technically, when someone addresses the spectators to their story, whether imagined or in a metanarrative sense, it's fourth person narration. As distinguished by acknowledgement of oneself and/or the other characters as characters, to the people on the other side of a fourth wall (again, imagined or meta) rather than to other characters who share their same universe.

 

[SinclairGroupLLP]

I do it with my main, first person POV character all the time. I've even made a joke where the MC gave one of my frequent commenters a hard time. I find it amusing, a little bit of fan service to keep things light.

 

[Britva415]

I want to try writing in a style where the narrator addresses the reader, breaks the fourth wall, and acknowledges they're telling a story.

I wish first-person narrators would do this more often.

 

[Britva415]

the Fourth Wall isn't really a "thing" in FP

I more or less agree, but only because a first-person narrator is already narrating to the “audience,” which defaults to the reader, without some kind of frame making the audience someone in-universe.

This always leaves me looking for the narrator to explain who I am to them and why they’re telling me this story.

 

[TheLobster]

Technically, when someone addresses the spectators to their story, whether imagined or in a metanarrative sense, it's fourth person narration.

The terms "Nth person" narration come from the grammatical person of the pronouns used. These stop at three; there is no "fourth person" by mere analogy to "fourth wall".

 

[Britva415]

The terms "Nth person" narration come from the grammatical person of the pronouns used. These stop at three; there is no "fourth person" by mere analogy to "fourth wall".

Yeah. Fourth-wall breaks address “you,” the second person. The fact that this “you” is not in-universe makes no difference to the grammatical person.