Hi there.
I have been dragging my feet a bit with this one but I found someone to inspire me to finish it. I have tried to do something different, something of how I see people and emotions.
I've had 3/4 of this story edited already for grammar and a little structure but looking for an experienced editor to make it shine. The story contains restraint, 3-sums and adultury. But it's more than that, there's twists and I'm trying to provoke a realism so the reader can be involved and connects with it. Here's a sample of the first part. Please get in touch to discuss. Thank you. Yours cordially. Jay X
.....
Ominous black clouds rolled over the hilltops into the forest below, a dark and brooding veil below a coffin lid sky. The harsh winds fingers wildly caressed the tree tops, a dark green sea waving in the cold malice of the brewing storm.
The static heavy reception over the news report coming from Gabe's truck stereo wasn't good. The black mass above mirrored the reporter's warning of an impending down pour. 'and five other variations on how I was to be fucked' Gabe thought to himself as the first rain drops hit the windscreen. "That might just mess up my plans" he said out loud as he drove deeper into old pine forest. The headlights cut through the screen of rain, carving a slice out of the darkness, the muddy road twisting and turning through the pinewood avenues. 'I should have taken that next road on...' He thought to himself whilst glancing over to the dishevelled map amongst a collection of carabiners, climbing books, a compass and various bits of rope that occupied the cab seat most of the time. Taking intermittent snatches of ordinance survey info every so often and puzzling at where the hell he was, Gabe didn't notice the form up ahead on the road through the cloudy smeared screen. As he looked up two people waving insanely and huddled under something jumped into his vision in the bright glow of the headlights. Gabe was pretty dexterous, he knew more than most you need to react quickly when danger presents itself unexpectedly. Every good climbing instructor should be, he had often thought. He pumped the break, hearing the noise of gravel and mud hitting the wheel arches and as the truck skidded he turned the wheel to the left, and then countered to the right, broadsiding to a dramatic halt no more than two feet from the near victims in the night.
I have been dragging my feet a bit with this one but I found someone to inspire me to finish it. I have tried to do something different, something of how I see people and emotions.
I've had 3/4 of this story edited already for grammar and a little structure but looking for an experienced editor to make it shine. The story contains restraint, 3-sums and adultury. But it's more than that, there's twists and I'm trying to provoke a realism so the reader can be involved and connects with it. Here's a sample of the first part. Please get in touch to discuss. Thank you. Yours cordially. Jay X
.....
Ominous black clouds rolled over the hilltops into the forest below, a dark and brooding veil below a coffin lid sky. The harsh winds fingers wildly caressed the tree tops, a dark green sea waving in the cold malice of the brewing storm.
The static heavy reception over the news report coming from Gabe's truck stereo wasn't good. The black mass above mirrored the reporter's warning of an impending down pour. 'and five other variations on how I was to be fucked' Gabe thought to himself as the first rain drops hit the windscreen. "That might just mess up my plans" he said out loud as he drove deeper into old pine forest. The headlights cut through the screen of rain, carving a slice out of the darkness, the muddy road twisting and turning through the pinewood avenues. 'I should have taken that next road on...' He thought to himself whilst glancing over to the dishevelled map amongst a collection of carabiners, climbing books, a compass and various bits of rope that occupied the cab seat most of the time. Taking intermittent snatches of ordinance survey info every so often and puzzling at where the hell he was, Gabe didn't notice the form up ahead on the road through the cloudy smeared screen. As he looked up two people waving insanely and huddled under something jumped into his vision in the bright glow of the headlights. Gabe was pretty dexterous, he knew more than most you need to react quickly when danger presents itself unexpectedly. Every good climbing instructor should be, he had often thought. He pumped the break, hearing the noise of gravel and mud hitting the wheel arches and as the truck skidded he turned the wheel to the left, and then countered to the right, broadsiding to a dramatic halt no more than two feet from the near victims in the night.
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