Fetlife

[snakebyte]

Anybody else on it? Still trying to understand it lol.

 

[MysteriousRyu]

More or less a much more spammier/densely populated version of Lit meets Myspace. At least that's how I see it.

 

[Txsecretpassion]

I’ve been told it’s a better place to find meetups and group things then it is for finding individuals and having meaningful conversations. Mostly for us it’s been weird guys showing dick pics begging to be made a slave which is like the exact opposite of what we’ve posted in our profile so who knows it’s not our most used site but we have one just in case

 

[snakebyte]

Just throwing it out there my name on there is dolphinsfan77 if anyone is looking for a new friend.

 

[seetheartinme]

Yes. I'm on it. Same username as here. Love it! Great for meeting fellow kinksters and finding events. Met my girlfriend on there.

 

[snakebyte]

Cool.. I'm looking for new friend or any friends lol.. not sure how to make friends on there lol. Facebook it's just search for people I know lol

 

[masterofnymphoslut]

I was on Fet when I lived in the Chicago area. It was ok. Made a few friends on there. But most of my playmates came from other sites.

 

[Justhappytobealive]

I’m on. It’s hard to navigate three. Just keep going.

 

[Justhappytobealive]

Onecraziedude

 

[scposteel]

I have one, but never got much use from it

 

[1983ctm]

1983ctm if anybody wants to say hi on there. I have chatted with a few people. I find the search criteria lacking for some things, but I won't pay for it either, so not sure if I'm missing anything on there other than vids. Like all sites, very heavily male populated. I find a lot of onlyfans trying to get people to have a look as well. If I were in the market so to speak, there are quite a few people in my area on there. Also the only way I've found to see if people have been on in years sometimes is to check out their activity. It could be very misleading as to how many active profiles there are...

 

[MissPennyLane]

I've enjoyed it from the sense of finding local meets and then from those meeting local people, it's been a really lovely freeing experience. I mostly ignore most of the messages I get to be honest though.

 

[Wishingbox]

I’m torn I want to like FetLife but it just doesn’t quite have it.

I think the one thing it’s missing is a way to see what people are engaging with. Lit has the what’s new view which is what I use the most.

Maybe it’s that Lit has fewer overall categories so activity is more condensed?

I like the journal and writing aspect of Fetlife and that they have very specific categories even though they might not be as regularly active.

 

[Unravelx]

I’m torn I want to like FetLife but it just doesn’t quite have it.

I think the one thing it’s missing is a way to see what people are engaging with. Lit has the what’s new view which is what I use the most.

Maybe it’s that Lit has fewer overall categories so activity is more condensed?

I like the journal and writing aspect of Fetlife and that they have very specific categories even though they might not be as regularly active.

FL has the kinky and popular feeds, similar?

 

[Deleted member 6666935]

So based on some recommendations here and elsewhere, I decided to check it out and created a profile, joined groups, posted ads, and nothing has happened for me yet. It’s not really set up to meet people online, it seems the main focus is on group meetups and the like, which doesn’t work for me personally. Like every site like it, there’s a lot of profiles that seem abandoned, and even though it’s 100% free people don’t have the common courtesy to always say no thanks or not interested. Your mileage may vary.

 

[cdstefi]

I know this is gonna look hard to believe but I honestly met my wife on there.

I think we first connected on a group (you need to engage in groups and put yourself out as a sociable person with something to say that's not just about getting your rocks off, that's the entire premise of fetlife: "Facebook for kinksters"). We clicked from a shared enjoyment of photography and selfies, discussed that a bit, pushed the conversation a bit (all this before we met as we were on opposite sides of the Atlantic at the time). And I suggested I take a flight for my 50th birthday. She accepted, threw her thong at me when she picked me up from Dulles airport, and a lot of life changes later we're still together, married in Feb this year.

I know it reads like a fairytale. I think we got lucky and just happened to meet at a time we both needed what the other had to offer and you're not gonna find that every day. But it can happen. Just remember the immortal words: "You can't make Fetch happen".

 

[cdstefi]

Just throwing it out there my name on there is dolphinsfan77 if anyone is looking for a new friend.

OK I stalked that profile. No group engagement. A bucket list of meaningless fetishes. A few comments on pics. Nothing much at all like social engagement.

I think a big part of why my wife decided to be into me was how I interacted socially with other people she knew there. I wasn't just "oh, hit me up because I sex".

It's a total trope but true too; women like people (men or women) because of the person they show themself to be, in public and in the open. How they engage. The liking comes before the lusting.

 

[cdstefi]

FL has the kinky and popular feeds, similar?

Nah. K&P is just an engagement algorithm. If somebody has lots of followers who comment on their rubbish they'll make K&P. I post loads of explicit pics and not one of them has ever made K&P because I'm not a 22 y/o nubile but a middle aged crossdressing male (not bitter either).

The one single piece of content of mine that did get traction and make K&P was a piece I wrote about my love for the absolutely fucking brilliant human being my wife is. That got a truckload of engagement because I guess it struck a chord with people who wanted to be seen like I see her. Still my proudest fetlife moment, and just as a reminder, it had zero kink or sexual content.

 

[snakebyte]

OK I stalked that profile. No group engagement. A bucket list of meaningless fetishes. A few comments on pics. Nothing much at all like social engagement.

I think a big part of why my wife decided to be into me was how I interacted socially with other people she knew there. I wasn't just "oh, hit me up because I sex".

It's a total trope but true too; women like people (men or women) because of the person they show themself to be, in public and in the open. How they engage. The liking comes before the lusting.

I'm still learning it.. trying to figure out my way around.

 

[cdstefi]

That's exactly it. Treat it as Tinder for kinksters and you'll be SOL. It's a place where ideally people connect and chat and socialise, via what their kinks are but without being treated as a kink dispenser. I've made several RL friends there who I'm never going to have sex with but value them for who they are. Go into it with that attitude and somebody will eventually decide you're the one.

 

[wizard59]

Anybody else on it? Still trying to understand it lol.

I am a member, it is for making local connections and meeting people at group events. I will say many of those I have met are BDSM players. Once you get feted you can have fun.

 

[Cernunnos69]

On it as MasterHornedGod! But by far most of the women are advertising their OnlyFans now, it's mostly useless since I don't live in a place that has any group meetups, I'm rural remote!!

 

[34ilookyounger]

I was on Fet when I lived in the Chicago area. It was ok. Made a few friends on there. But most of my playmates came from other sites.

Which sites?

 

[cdstefi]

On it as MasterHornedGod! But by far most of the women are advertising their OnlyFans now, it's mostly useless since I don't live in a place that has any group meetups, I'm rural remote!!

I assume if somebody blows your horn on a certain night then a wild hunt begins?

 

[MissMandy86]

I have 97 photos on my fet profile and it's like .. 8ish years old
https://fetlife.com/users/2323945