Feel like giving up

[OnceBitten]

When I first started posting on here again, I was having a good time...Then I started talking to some of you, and the more I do, the lonelier I get.. I don't want this to turn into a pity party for 1, but for some reason, tonite, I just feel like giving up. I've been told, hey, you have to be happy with yourself first, or, hey, it will happen when it's supposed to....I know deep down inside that's true, but how do I tell it to my heart? Because right now, it's breaking in a million pieces, and reasoning with it isn't helping.
Just when I think I've put the past behind me, all the emotional abuse, all the loneliness, I start missing having a lover, a friend, the day to day ordinariness of life with someone, and I come undone. I can' t stop the tears from falling tonight, I'm all alone in this small apartment, and suddenly, it doesn't seem fun anymore. I am so scared of ending up liking someone, especially someone who is long distance from me. It just makes me feel that much more alone. I have no friends, no one to put their arms around me and get me through this. You don't share 5 years with someone, wear an engagement ring, and then, in two months, you're brand new. I just wish someone was here with me, to make me forget everything. It's so painful right now, I don't know what to do....I guess I thought if I just posted what I'm feeling, it would help me calm down, since I have no one to talk to right now. I am happier with myself than I've been in a long time, this just comes down to pure loneliness, it aches so bad in my heart right now, and being so sensitive like I am, it's really getting to me. I'm just so tired of having to be the strong one, taking care of my daughter all by myself, I just want someone I can lean on, let them take care of me, and take a break from having to be the strong one.
I'm sure I'll feel better eventually, but tonite, I'm am just going to curl up on the couch, and cry myself to sleep...

 

[Lady Emerald]

Hey there!
I hear you, having a tough night. I don't have any answers for you but know that you are doing a great and important job with your daughter. I'm not sure what age she is, but I have a 9 yearold daughter and she is like the other half of my soul--we are so alike and share such a powerful love it really transcends everything. Sometimes when children are younger they are very physically demanding, you can feel so tired and indeed alone. But know that it does get better, as they get older they blossom into friends and inspiration. Being in a marriage or lt relationship does not guarantee closeness, good sex, or any sex!! Believe what you are going through now is worth it for your daughter, and for your self in the future. You are so much stronger than you think!!

 

[fuzion]

wanting to give up seems like the easiest way but it's not always the best way. there are people out there that you haven't met and you do have your daughter. Life may throw you a curve ball and you may miss a few times but never give up.

I agree with your post 100%. In the past I too have cried myself to sleep out of loneliness. I seem to be the strong one everyone turns to. When in reality I am just as fragile on the inside as the next person. A pair of arms and a shoulder to lean on is what I miss the most about not having someone there. If you need a shoulder to lean on you can borrow mine.

 

[Lady Emerald]

Hey there!
I hear you, having a tough night. I don't have any answers for you but know that you are doing a great and important job with your daughter. I'm not sure what age she is, but I have a 9 yearold daughter and she is like the other half of my soul--we are so alike and share such a powerful love it really transcends everything. Sometimes when children are younger they are very physically demanding, you can feel so tired and indeed alone. But know that it does get better, as they get older they blossom into friends and inspiration. Being in a marriage or lt relationship does not guarantee closeness, good sex, or any sex!! Believe what you are going through now is worth it for your daughter, and for your self in the future. You are so much stronger than you think!!

 

[OnceBitten]

Let me clear something up

Ok, this is what it comes down to: I want it all, I want the movie romance.....I want flowers for no reason at all.....I want rosepetals on the bed when I come home at night. I want him to call me from work, because he can't stop thinking about me.
I want him to be so proud that I"m his, that he talks about me to everyone he meets. I want him to look at me with desire, and not hatred. I want him to love me, even when my hair is sticking straight up, and I've been sick. I want him to sit up all night, just talking with me, about nothing at all. I want him to want me to have his children. I want him to do all those little things, not because he has to , but because making me happy makes his day.

See, I've never had that, ever, in my whole life, so I"m sorry if I"ve rambled on too long, or if this isn't the place or time to say any of this at all, but I am tired of being afraid to say what I want, what I need. So, take it or leave it. But that's who I am.
And if I settle for anything less, I'm not being true to myself, because none of you may know me, or care about anything more than seeing my tits, but I am a real person, and I have so much more to give, if only someone would let me.
So that's it......that's what I want: someone to show me how it's supposed to be between a man and a woman, to tell me that it isn't like what I"ve been through, that not all guys are mean.
I'm so over the games people play sometimes, I've been there and done that a million times over, and now I'm ready for something much more meaningful, and lasting.

 

[eatinand]

you can't ever give in

hey once you can't give up i know you are feeling lonely we all go through that and you can't help what happens from day to day all you can do is go on and do your best you should feel good about yourself. you are a very pretty girl and i bet there are hundreds of guys out there that would just be lucky to find one like you. me included. sometimes hanging on day to day is the test to see if you can survive by yourself. just got out of a relationship myself and know it can be hard especially if you have lil ones.just wait till tomarrow and it will be a lil better.

 

[Lady Emerald]

Hey there!
I hear you, having a tough night. I don't have any answers for you but know that you are doing a great and important job with your daughter. I'm not sure what age she is, but I have a 9 yearold daughter and she is like the other half of my soul--we are so alike and share such a powerful love it really transcends everything. Sometimes when children are younger they are very physically demanding, you can feel so tired and indeed alone. But know that it does get better, as they get older they blossom into friends and inspiration. Being in a marriage or lt relationship does not guarantee closeness, good sex, or any sex!! Believe what you are going through now is worth it for your daughter, and for your self in the future. You are so much stronger than you think!!

 

[eatinand]

not all guys are mean

don't think i am mean and everyone wants the story book. would love to have that go on. usually when it happens the thing is just a lie and everyone gets hurt. can't take you to a movie but hope this flower makes you feel better.

 

[Rawmaster50]

I've bee through it also

Lovely lady, going through a separtaion and devorce is always hard. I was told that a person really shouldn't make any major decisions for two years after a divorce and I remamber why...because I was crazy after my divorce even though I was the one who wanted it!

We are all human and a big change like this is difficult. You can get through it with the friends you have here. I did it the hard way, by myself (I know, stupid male tricks!)

I had to wait almost five years before I remarried and I am glad I did. I wasted a lot of time with the wrong women, either married or playing games, and I never had to go to a bar to find them, so they were all sober mistakes. I finally decided that I was going through a nutty time and I would just have to enjoy the ride. Then most of the problems stopped, with the change of mind and heart.

Be careful where you go to get the things you want. It is in the truest sense a jungle out there and I hate to see anyone get hurt. Particularly lovely women in need of a good person. I wish you well and send flowers with the good wishes.

 

[FingersOfSkill]

Hey Once!
Been there
I was married for 8 years...Been D for 3...have 2 with her...B/6, G/9

Really tough on me...all of a sudden my kids and the love of my life were gone. I get lonley still... and sure times have been tough and I questioned it all for about a split millisecond...
I miss and yearn for all the things you speak of...Its only natural for a non hermit like person to do.
As to not gettin any....we are single parents, that if being good parents...our kids come first and we will get it and all else that we seek when its time...when we and our family is ready for it..
Dont get me wrong...I seek the same as you do...someone special to share life with... I am ready...it will happen...when??? PATIENTENCE!
Too bad we are not closer...

 

[azaroth]

HUG

I can't say I have any answers and we really don't know eachother. However I do know the feeling of lonliness and despair and I want you to imagine that I am giving you a warm supportive hug that feels friendly and compassionate. E-mail me if you want to chat my motives are one of support for a fellow human in pain.

Jared

 

[pop_54]

Hi love

I can offer you nothing but honest support love from a long way off, please don't let it all get you down too much, you've obviously had a shit time of it and now need some real love and support. Look to your family and friends, try to get out and about if you can, even a trip to the park with the kids can make life seem a lot more cheerful, you'd be surprised who you can meet on a day out if you consentrate on peoples reactions and body language.

BUT!! and I know you're a mature person, please take care in your fragile state of wanting, there are a lot of evil shit's about.

If you get very lonely or just need a remote shoulder, drop me a line anytime love.

pops.....

 

[BiCurGuy]

Hey once bitten just came acroos your post, you still feeling the same?, if so, maybe a chat with me could help, I have been through all that and a lot more, I have been were you are, and now I'm getting over it.
If you want to chat, I would love to help!!

 

[Bachlum Chaam]

Re: Hi love

I can offer you nothing but honest support love from a long way off, please don't let it all get you down too much, you've obviously had a shit time of it and now need some real love and support. Look to your family and friends, try to get out and about if you can, even a trip to the park with the kids can make life seem a lot more cheerful, you'd be surprised who you can meet on a day out if you consentrate on peoples reactions and body language.

BUT!! and I know you're a mature person, please take care in your fragile state of wanting, there are a lot of evil shit's about.

If you get very lonely or just need a remote shoulder, drop me a line anytime love.

pops.....

Lo pop I trust you are well my friend
My lady you have a pm

 

[HornyGirlBBW]

hang on in there once bitten. The heart is an amazing thing, no matter how many pieces it gets smashed into it somehow manages to put itself back together again .. eventually.

i suspect most of us here have been heartbroken and desolate at some point in our lives, but hey we've all got each other

i'm waiting for that windswept kiss on a smokey platform too! Fed up with kissing frogs!

 

[pop_54]

Re: Re: Hi love

Lo pop I trust you are well my friend
My lady you have a pm

Yo BC old mate, how's you these days??

Hey Horny Girl stop kissing those bloody Frogs you'll catch something Damn European Union, French taking our girls away

Hey Once Bitten lover, I hope life is looking better today for you my dear, remember you have friends here to chat to if you need us.

 

[MizTabby]

Hugs for you!

Now, now, you're among a whole world of friends here, OnceBitten, and I can understand how difficult things
can be sometimes, but you have to take the bull by the horns (or by whatever you choose ) and pick your sweet self up!
Look at all the supportive people who have stopped by to share some cheer and cheer you on, I think you're a winner by that scorecard, and yes, some of us have looked at your pics, you did want us to take a look at your beautiful physical attributes I think?
You are not alone in your romantic predicament my friend, lots share the same wishes, but we can't always get just what we want, yet sometimes we do in a way; perhaps not in the package we'd like, but someone special just the same.
I'd like to believe that among the vast Litmembership, there is someone who would love to get to know you and love you for who you are, but you have to do your part as well, get more acquainted, read the profiles, join a discussion or some fun thread that appeals to you and make yourself known,
your knight might not even be aware his lady is here, and I know you wouldn't want him to miss meeting you.
We all wish you the best

 

[shysub]

Sharing the same

Once Bitten
I cried reading your posts. I have been feeling this same way and your words only reiterated my very thoughts. I did that tonight after I got home from work. Tired of being alone and being the strong one, I cried myself to sleep only to wake up and nothing had changed. I would love to talk if you would also. I don't have any answers, but can be a friend. It might be some comfort knowing you are not alone.

Would love to hear from anyone else who would talk with a young woman who can't have too many friends.

 

[NYVI16]

I know exactly how you feel Once. I'm just recently out of a marriage and am quite lonely. But, I have a 6 month old daughter to think about so that helps. Nevertheless, I just take it a day at a time and try to get by. I figure, things'll come when they do. I hope you're doing better. Take care.

Ryan

 

[HornyGirlBBW]

group hug time