Feedback please

[prettygirl35]

I just posted this story, and was looking for some feedback or suggestions. I'm a writer just starting out, but welcome all comments. Thanks.

http://www.literotica.com/s/an-ad-for-seduction

 

[Inquietude]

I just posted this story, and was looking for some feedback or suggestions. I'm a writer just starting out, but welcome all comments. Thanks.

http://www.literotica.com/s/an-ad-for-seduction

Emmm, imho this is no good way of seduction at all. I mean if somebody likes anonymous people that's p-bably fine, but not 4 me. I personally don't like ppl staying anonymous when they know who they speak with or that they are looking exactly for You, want You and behave like creeps. That's sick. It's better to be open and call someone, saying, hey, I'm completly overwhelmed by you, can't stop thinking about you, please stay, need you close etc. That's human touch, not some complete absurds with anons and hotel meetups. That's seriusly twisted. Want a hotel with anon, gawd, it's simple, call girls do that. You don't even have to seduce a call girl, she does it for the money. Seduction is out of place.

'What if I replied to some complete psychopath?' - this was good though. It's not very probable to meet a psychopath, although it happens in real life. Yeah, though I doubt they do meet for sex, they have serious issues and they don't like meeting people at all. I think sex is excluded from their lives, from what I know from forensics it's more likely to be assaulted by so called 'normal person' than a real psycho. Normal ppl commit murders and rapes and so on, psychos do it rarely (psycho's reality is no TV reality), they're rather removed, more calculating and anxious people (like sexually inhibited, sexually anxious).