Feedback from all would be good!

What do you think of Ch.4

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ch 4

I liked Ch 4 much better. The "Madame" character had a bit of depth, the description of the setting was nice.

The sex of course was quite hot, but I'm not sure I totally bought into Sophie's accepting Jack emotionally and sexually, as she did in the story.

Perhaps more insight into Jack, and Sophie, some "mental monologues" might help the reader to understand why they still loved each other. Or maybe, it's just lust.


Iris
 
Thanks for the feedback Iris!

I can appreciate the point you made about both mental dialogue (I am working on trying to incorporate this a bit more in my new stuff), and about the plausability of Sophie and Jacks relationship...I guess I'm just a dreamer who likes to believe in a happy ending...although a 'warts and all' story would be pretty funny to write!

Thanks again

Madamefifi
 
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