Feedback for my first audio story

[Trovan]

Hi everyone,

Just published my first audio on Literotica and would love some feedback.

The Jazz Dream – An Encounter in the Betwixed Realm [M4F]

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-jazz-dream

Curious about:
• voice pacing
• atmosphere
• immersion

Text version if curious.

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-tantric-encounter

Thanks!

 

[Duil2]

Hi Trovan. I just listened to your audio piece. Overall I liked it. The imagery was good and it felt reminiscent of some versions of 'Alice's adventures in wonderland'. The voice pacing was good. At times I found the background music distracted me from the voice, especially when it wasn't just music but a song. I feel the atmosphere would have been better served with less intrusive music, instrumental only, perhaps. Unfortunately, I couldn't become totally immersed in the story because of these distractions. Hope this helps you to continue to improve what is already very good.

 

[darwin1859]

Well done. You have a good voice for this. I thought the pacing was good. I liked the music including the song, but it would have been more effective if it could have been softer during the narration.

As far as immersion goes, I had a little trouble understanding the "set up" at the beginning.

I had a little trouble understanding the dialog at times. I don't have any experience writing audio transcripts, so I don't know what your options are. In a story, I can tell what's said by the quotes and often I don't need dialog tags. I don't think you want to do voices, so I guess adding the dialog tags would help me understand who was talking and when the next person starts talking.

 

[Trovan]

Thanks for the feedback!

I'll try to incorporate it in my next story. I'm already working on better music handling.