Feedback for Falling Prey - The Second Chapter?

[geronimo_appleby]

just looking for some feedback for the above piece just submitted.

email, pm, here, i don't mind.

thank you.

okay, here's the link: click

 

[ellynei]

People here on feedback forum are lazy. Post a link to increase the chance of feedback.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

People here on feedback forum are lazy. Post a link to increase the chance of feedback.

erm...

it's on my sig.

 

[ellynei]

erm...

it's on my sig.

erm...

many people have sig turned off.

 

[geronimo_appleby]

erm...

many people have sig turned off.

jesus *mutter*

here

i don't know why i bother *grumble moan whinge*

 

[snuffalupicus]

Hey,

Really good stuff, better than most in this genre. (The fantastical Gothic genre I'll call it while being an S&Mey control type of thing)

I like the portrayal of the woman as a timid reluctant person caught in the main characters spell, the believability of her character is what makes it hot.

This stuff can come off really cheesy sometimes but you do a great job with it. Good balance of elements all around, dialogue was good, no real complaints keep it up, gave you a 5 on the rating scale.

regards,
Snuffalupicus

 

[geronimo_appleby]

Hey,

Really good stuff, better than most in this genre. (The fantastical Gothic genre I'll call it while being an S&Mey control type of thing)

I like the portrayal of the woman as a timid reluctant person caught in the main characters spell, the believability of her character is what makes it hot.

This stuff can come off really cheesy sometimes but you do a great job with it. Good balance of elements all around, dialogue was good, no real complaints keep it up, gave you a 5 on the rating scale.

regards,
Snuffalupicus

why thank you.

 

[ellynei]

That story was amazing.

Good stuff.

Makes me a bit sorry I started at chapter 2.

Most of all I love the demon's monologues. So cleverly they handle the background, while being immensely fascinating in their own right.

Impressive

 

[geronimo_appleby]

That story was amazing.

Good stuff.

Makes me a bit sorry I started at chapter 2.

Most of all I love the demon's monologues. So cleverly they handle the background, while being immensely fascinating in their own right.

Impressive

thank you; i'm glad i went back and posted that link.