Favourite Negative Reviews

[CyranoJ]

Huh. I think I just had someone tell me they didn't like one of my stories because they thought I was ripping off Steinbeck's Of Mice and Men.

I've been sometimes intrigued, amused, instructed or bemused by negative reviews before, but I don't think I've ever had one actually make my day quite like that. One of my wank stories reminded someone of Steinbeck? I don't care if I was the inferior term in the comparison (because of course I was), I'm still like:

https://cdn.meme.am/instances/59570979.jpg

So, good excuse for a Fave Negative Reviews thread, maybe. Share if you feel inclined.

 

[lovecraft68]

I have a positive one that compared me to Kafka which although I realize is over the top flattery still made me smile.

As for negative remarks I'm the type that gets a laugh out of the really insulting ones. This one is from an LW story(the best ones always are) and it just made me smile for some reason.

you shit pissed and vomited on valentines day

and this gem from the same story

Anonymous
02/14/14
Never Again

Where does he get this pathetic shit? I got sick of picking the corn out his verbal diarrhea on the second page and had to stop reading. Awful. Just awful.

 

[ChloeTzang]

Huh. I think I just had someone tell me they didn't like one of my stories because they thought I was ripping off Steinbeck's Of Mice and Men.

I've been sometimes intrigued, amused, instructed or bemused by negative reviews before, but I don't think I've ever had one actually make my day quite like that.

Ohhhhhh, I'm so so jealous, well done! I don't think I'll ever be good enough to be accused or ripping of Steinbeck.

Negative reviews? I've had a few but I guess these are the ones that either make me laugh, amuse me or make me think....

And ok, annoying the French? Generically, I can live with that but I feel bad about this one. It was a throwaway line. On the other hand, with all the negatives thrown at us americans, hey, I'll live with the shame.... and I have to say the same story also insulted SJW's, anti-gun activists, whiggers, Obama and Somalis so it wasn't like I was intentionally discriminating....

1 star From a frenchman who was quite enjoying it till you insulted my country and spoiled it. At least we're not all ass fuckers like the yanks!

This one I just loved. I still laugh.

Yeah, she cheats on the scores. Look at how few votes this story and all her other stories have in the hall of fame. Less than three hundred votes. How many fucking low votes had to get thrown away to get the number down that low and the score up this high. Just another lying cheating cunt trying to get a score they don't deserve.

No guesses as to the category the story this comment was on was from

Any Sequal Should include all different characters in totally different situations by a different author. That is the only way it can be better or worse... Because this is an atrocious unscoreable mess. I don't know which character is the most contemptible, but none of them have the sense God gave a goose.

And this was negative but I kine of liked it. The commenter captured my main male characters so well....

Wow...Your Author's Note was no joke, cuz that was some seriously sad, depressing shit. In terms of craft, it's well-written; you're a good writer. And it's certainly a pleasure to encounter erotic fiction writers who aren't middle-class, middle-aged white males.

Judging by the scores, this story's themes and characters resonate favorably with a certain population of readers. However... For myself, the misadventures of some truly deplorable, and morally bankrupt, wealthy misogynists / shitbags (people who should be lined up against a wall and shot) are an adventure I'll opt out of.

This doesn't count as a negative review but I loved it all the same....

Chloe ...I would read a technical manual if you wrote it!

 

[holliday1960]

Well, now I just feel bad. Here's the worst one I've gotten so far, but then I'm not as prolific as y'all are:

'A southern soap opera! You took a young wife, and slowly turned her into a slut. Then turned her into a whore...'

Mission Accomplished.

 

[My I]

I've had a few comments compare my writing to Heinlein. In a good way. I don't seem to get negative feedback that shows any sort of real intelligence.

One of my favorites that I received many,many years ago on one of my stories:

"Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid."

That one always makes me chuckle.

 

[lovecraft68]

I've had a few comments compare my writing to Heinlein. In a good way. I don't seem to get negative feedback that shows any sort of real intelligence.

One of my favorites that I received many,many years ago on one of my stories:

"Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid. Your so stupid."

That one always makes me chuckle.

Was that from this guy?

 

[My I]

Was that from this guy?

Coulda been. The irony had me laughing for days.

 

[SimonDoom]

"Here, eat my used condom" leaps to my mind as a memorable and negative reaction. It was in response to an LW story I wrote, of course, with a cuckolded husband. But I got a lot of over-the-top comments to that one.

Other memorable comments to that story included:

It's been a long time since I've read a piece of shit like this.

Now you've ruined all Mike Hammer stories for me , Happy with yourself ?

illiterate cuck shit.

and

What the fuck is wrong with you?

I take some comfort in the fact that despite all the bad comments and the overall poor rating 623 people have bothered to vote on it since early January and 14 made it a favorite. Thank you, 14!

 

[NotWise]

I don't get very many comments. I had to go back and look to see if there was something to add here. It didn't take very long, and nope, nothing.

I need a good insult. That's missing from my Lit experience.

 

[My I]

I don't get very many comments. I had to go back and look to see if there was something to add here. It didn't take very long, and nope, nothing.

I need a good insult. That's missing from my Lit experience.

Happy to oblige:

If you were a little smarter, we'd have to water you.

Feel better now?

 

[ChloeTzang]

I don't get very many comments. I had to go back and look to see if there was something to add here. It didn't take very long, and nope, nothing.

I need a good insult. That's missing from my Lit experience.

Just post a good troll-baiting story on Loving Wives. You'll get lots of them

 

[NotWise]

Happy to oblige:

If you were a little smarter, we'd have to water you.

Feel better now?

Well, that's a little generic but it helps.

 

[My I]

Well, that's a little generic but it helps.

I do what I can.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

This was from a long time ago and the story isn't up and more...

Anonymous (of course)

I hope you and your wife die from AIDs.

Yes, it was on a loving wives story and the poor dumb bastard thought it was a real life story. So many dickheads out there.

 

[holliday1960]

I don't get very many comments. I had to go back and look to see if there was something to add here. It didn't take very long, and nope, nothing.

I need a good insult. That's missing from my Lit experience.

Oh, well, NOW I see where you got your name NW. You seriously did not just paste that target on yourself did you? On the AH?

 

[NotWise]

Oh, well, NOW I see where you got your name NW. You seriously did not just paste that target on yourself did you? On the AH?

Well, so far they haven't lived up to the reputation. Where's the 'I flushed you're characters this morning and look! They're back already!'

Etc., etc...

 

[CyranoJ]

Well, so far they haven't lived up to the reputation. Where's the 'I flushed you're characters this morning and look! They're back already!'

Etc., etc...

Your mama is so fat, she changed her life around and started eating better and exercising, and now she looks amazing.

 

[DJK2017]

I sometimes think there's a small but zealous group of jilted husbands who lurk on all erotic fiction websites, just waiting for loving wife stories they can rage against.

 

[holliday1960]

Well, so far they haven't lived up to the reputation. Where's the 'I flushed you're characters this morning and look! They're back already!'

Etc., etc...

Is that something you read, or something you wrote? It's doesn't seem to have your usual flair for romanticism, but then, there IS that other side of you...

 

[TxRad]

Good, bad, or indifferent?

"You write like my mother fucks."

And no, it was not a LW's story or an Incest story.

 

[holliday1960]

Good, bad, or indifferent?

"You write like my mother fucks."

And no, it was not a LW's story or an Incest story.

My response would have to be, "quite a compliment coming from someone who knows."

 

[Haulover]

The only negative comments I've had were for a story in which a main character dies at the end.

In truth, I could have changed the ending, but it was (loosely) based on fact - and I wanted to keep it as 'real' as possible.

Still, it got 50,000 reads, 470 votes, and is running at 4.70. I guess the score might have been higher with a happier ending...

They seemed to like the story, but I got HAMMERED because of the tragic ending:

• It is like you just ran out of inspiration at the end, and went "well, let's just finish this up as quick as we can.."
  
• Do an alternate ending
  
• The story doesn't belong in the incest section, but you wanted more views and calling it swinging twins certainly gets more clicks than "my sister-in-law dies at the end because I wrote myself into a corner". You obviously have a creative mind, however...
  
• From the comments you should realize your writing was appreciated. The ending wasn't, probably should take a cue from that.
  
• Terrible ending to a Great story. You screwed it up. Come on, this is Literotica. You got your "5," but I'll never read another of your writings without going to the end to see if you ruin it.
  
• Sweet and sexy story ruined by a terrible ending. The story was so awesome, the sex parts were arousing and some of the characters were cool. It would have been the perfect story until that terrible ending ruined it. That was awful.

 

[lovecraft68]

The only negative comments I've had were for a story in which a main character dies at the end.

In truth, I could have changed the ending, but it was (loosely) based on fact - and I wanted to keep it as 'real' as possible.

Still, it got 50,000 reads, 470 votes, and is running at 4.70. I guess the score might have been higher with a happier ending...

They seemed to like the story, but I got HAMMERED because of the tragic ending:

• It is like you just ran out of inspiration at the end, and went "well, let's just finish this up as quick as we can.."
  
• Do an alternate ending
  
• The story doesn't belong in the incest section, but you wanted more views and calling it swinging twins certainly gets more clicks than "my sister-in-law dies at the end because I wrote myself into a corner". You obviously have a creative mind, however...
  
• From the comments you should realize your writing was appreciated. The ending wasn't, probably should take a cue from that.
  
• Terrible ending to a Great story. You screwed it up. Come on, this is Literotica. You got your "5," but I'll never read another of your writings without going to the end to see if you ruin it.
  
• Sweet and sexy story ruined by a terrible ending. The story was so awesome, the sex parts were arousing and some of the characters were cool. It would have been the perfect story until that terrible ending ruined it. That was awful.

With the exception of a couple of category's here, people want fun and HEA only. Dose them with some depressing reality they get pissed.

I'm still amazed at how incest, which is a pretty squicky kink to anyone not into it, has an audience that abhors anything not light and fluffy. You'd think with an extreme kink like that they'd be a edgier crowd, but nope. Learned that when I first came here and had the audacity to have a brother and sister engage in rough style sex.

 

[My I]

Is,"Please finish it." considered Negative? I don't write sequels.

 

[Areala-chan]

The one which made me scratch my head (and is no longer there as I assume someone else reported it, since I don't delete comments left on my stories) was a random slagging from an anon who wrote something akin to, "Rubbish. This belongs in the beano."

I've no idea at all what it meant. I am aware of two Beanos: the gas-reducing drops one can dribble on food, and the UK-based comic magazine. Given this was left on an I/T story, something tells me the comic mag wouldn't have published it unless "Dennis the Menace" has gotten a whole lot stranger.

Here it is, more than two years later, and I'm still clueless. Anybody care to venture a guess?