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Expertise

Expertise

Omniscient, Omnipotent and Occasionally Charming
Joined
Feb 29, 2000
Posts
10,633
Please don't anyone take offence i'm tired and feeling silly. Some of the questions are legit though.



Marilyn Manson. Is he, in fact, "Paul" from The Wonder Years?

Latina, when is Franks birthday? I wanna' know when to celebrate christmas this year.

Does anyone else miss Flagg?

Am I the only guy here who uses A LOT of personal hygiene products during their daily toilette?

The Reverend Horton Heat. Poser or RockaBilly messiah?

Can someone please explain to me why I love watching Coronation Street and the BBC version of The Antiques Roadshow?

Wouldn't CNN's Bobbie Batista and Laurin Sydney be tremendous in a lesbian porno scene with a lotta' oil?

What are you having for lunch?

Paper or plastic?




Have a nice day guys I need sustenance and a vat of coffee.
 
Marilyn Manson. Is he, in fact, "Paul" from The Wonder Years? Who?

Latina, when is Franks birthday? I wanna' know when to celebrate christmas this year. Ugh, just ugh. MY birthday is FAR more IMPORTANT darn it. You were SUPPOSED to do the chaps thing for me but you didn't. I'm inclined to pout.

Does anyone else miss Flagg? Yes, I do. No Deborah, not the dildo, get Flagg, yeah, get him!!!

Am I the only guy here who uses A LOT of personal hygiene products during their daily toilette? Toilette? You used the word toilette in conjuction with your morning get ready for work routine??? *snicker* You can't possibly use more than the StudMuffin, he uses a vat of the stuff every morning, it's enough to make one gag.

The Reverend Horton Heat. Poser or RockaBilly messiah? Poser.

Can someone please explain to me why I love watching Coronation Street and the BBC version of The Antiques Roadshow? The whole toilette thing.

Wouldn't CNN's Bobbie Batista and Laurin Sydney be tremendous in a lesbian porno scene with a lotta' oil? Ewww, just ewwwww

What are you having for lunch? Food?

Paper or plastic? Neither, I bring one of those canvas bag thingerbobs. I get 25 cents off for every bag I use instead of theirs. Economical and enviro friendly.

I have some coffee left over from my days in the Navy, the stuff never rots, it has a half-life of like ten trillion years or something. Garaunteed to make a dead man hyperactive. Wanna try?
 
How many personal hygiene products DO you use, Exp?

Why have you been up so long anyway?

Horton Who? (sorry, Dr. Seuss on the brain today)

Plastic

.........and I got your sustenance right here baby. *grin*
 
Expertise said:
Marilyn Manson. Is he, in fact, "Paul" from The Wonder Years? Yes, he is.

Latina, when is Franks birthday? I wanna' know when to celebrate christmas this year. It's today, we should all celebrate!

Does anyone else miss Flagg? Hell, yes I do!!!

Am I the only guy here who uses A LOT of personal hygiene products during their daily toilette? I doubt it.

The Reverend Horton Heat. Poser or RockaBilly messiah? Definitely, poser.

Can someone please explain to me why I love watching Coronation Street and the BBC version of The Antiques Roadshow? You're on your own on this one, babe.

Wouldn't CNN's Bobbie Batista and Laurin Sydney be tremendous in a lesbian porno scene with a lotta' oil? Oh God, yes!

What are you having for lunch? I don't know, was that an invitation?

Paper or plastic? Neither, what muffin said. [/B]
Click to expand...
 
re. Personal Hygiene Products etc.

In order;

Toothpaste, Anti plaque rinse,floss,Shampoo, conditioner, Apricot facial scrub (yes thats what I said), anti-bacterial soap, moisturizing body wash, shaving gel, after shave gel, face protector cream (sesame oil and cocoa butter), Polo Sport body splash, deoderant,cologne (Boss). hair gel or mousse

I smell like a whore on payday. LOL

I have been up far longer than normal due to the fact that this burg does not have enough "ice surfaces" and the team I coach is forced to practice at 05:30 once a week.

BTW. Your grin is infectious and now I am horny and hungry.;)
 
Re: re. Personal Hygiene Products etc.

Expertise said:
I smell like a whore on payday.
Click to expand...

Hey! I resemble that remark! I am a glutton for cosmetics/face products in whatever shape or form! Give me a mongo department store and a fleet of helpful enthusiastic sales people and I'm as close to heaven as one could get on this cruel planet. And better yet, give me buckets of dough and I'm the messiah for ugly and cosmetically challenged people everywhere. Come let me minister to you! Here's a fun link for ya, EXP, you girlie man!
http://www.cosmeticconnection.com
Heather might be the second coming......I'm waiting to see what she thinks of some Benefit stuff.
 
Re: re. Personal Hygiene Products etc.

Expertise said:
In order;

Toothpaste, Anti plaque rinse,floss,Shampoo, conditioner, Apricot facial scrub (yes thats what I said), anti-bacterial soap, moisturizing body wash, shaving gel, after shave gel, face protector cream (sesame oil and cocoa butter), Polo Sport body splash, deoderant,cologne (Boss). hair gel or mousse

I smell like a whore on payday. LOL
Click to expand...

Hooolllly fuck Batman.
 
re. Holy Fuck Batman

But you could safely eat off any part of my body and have a pleasant olfactory experience while you're there.

Nothing is over done. You have to be damn close to me before you get even a whiff.

I think its a result of a couple of situations in the field where I was forced to go a couple of weeks without a shower. I like to feel clean and fresh. If that makes me a girlie man...... oh well.
 
Re: re. Holy Fuck Batman

Expertise said:
But you could safely eat off any part of my body and have a pleasant olfactory experience while you're there.
Click to expand...



OOOoooooooooooooooooooooooo could I really???? Please????

*licking lips and droooooling*
 
I like drooling "muffins"

For your dining pleasure would you prefer me on my back or on my stomach.;)
 
Mmmmmmm decisions decisions....

On your back. You're a more *wink* tasty dish that way.
 
I like girlie men...they're lickable from head to toe with their
Run your fingers through kind of hair
Necks waiting to be sniffed
Soft cheeks made to be caressed
Lips have never felt the sting of chappedness
Skin has never been rough or callused

I could continue down your body, but it's seems a bit redundant at this point, and besides I need to go do something.....yeah that's it
 
Minor excursion on a tangent KM

Which reminds me of one of the funnier pick up lines I was ever confronted with.

A girl approached me at a club and asked "How tall are you"?.

I replied "I'm 6'2""

She comes back with "I meant on your back"

Even though I am normally loathe to, how could I refuse her request to dance after a line like that.
 
I think Marilyn Manson's real name is Brian Warner & he is NOT Paul from the Wonder Years, at least not according to his parents interview on VH1 awhile back.
 
Marilyn Manson. Is he, in fact, "Paul" from The Wonder Years? No, he's the love child of Alice Cooper and Shelly DuVall.

Latina, when is Franks birthday? I wanna' know when to celebrate christmas this year. Some say the birth was actually in April, but we celebrate it Dec 25th because the early Christians were attempting to supplant the annual druid winter festivals. I hope that helps. Let me know if you want me to start looking for eastern stars.

Does anyone else miss Flagg? I am Flagg you big knucklehead.

Am I the only guy here who uses A LOT of personal hygiene products during their daily toilette? Yes. Fag.

The Reverend Horton Heat. Poser or RockaBilly messiah? Poser. Bill Clinton is the Rockabilly Messiah.

Can someone please explain to me why I love watching Coronation Street and the BBC version of The Antiques Roadshow? For the same reason you love the stiff, clean bristles on a new toothbrush and sit in your living room for hours reading after it's just been dusted and vaccumed. The elegance of creature comfort minutia. Either that or they just turned off your HBO.

Wouldn't CNN's Bobbie Batista and Laurin Sydney be tremendous in a lesbian porno scene with a lotta' oil? Are they chicks? Then yes.

What are you having for lunch? Boston Market swedish meatballs. Mmmm.

Paper or plastic? Here in LA Vons Supermarkets now requires their bag-boy drones to ask "Do you need any help taking your groceries out to your car today?" (They always say "today", like I'm going to say "No, but tomorrow I'm cleaning out the trunk. Are you free?") The last time I got asked this I was buying a bottle of soda. "Do you need any help taking your groceries out to your car today?" "Uh, yeah. Better double-bag it first and get the dolly." It's like the way Blockbuster forces their employees to say "Hello! Can I help you find anything today?" (again with the "today") every freakin' time a customer enters the store. We're living in an age of mandated manners and facades of corporate congeniality. Paper or plastic? Neither, I say! Hand them a Fed Ex phone number and say "Ship it!". Then go over to Blockbuster and tell them you need help finding your goddamn dog. "Today!" Bastards.
 
Too fucking funny.

Jesus Dixon you had me almost pissing myself I was laughing so hard.

Always an honor to be your strait man, sir.
 
no Marilyn Manson is not Paul from Wonder Years...I think I'm the only one on the whole board who actually likes him though.

Teresa, you are right about his name though.
 
Thank fucking God! I've been wondering who our Sexual Messiah was going to be and know I finally know! Just tell me why the fuck does it have to be Frank? Even in the gold turban and breakaway Rudolph Valentino sultan pants, I'm left with a vague ill feeling.
 
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