Everyone. Post here only once.

[sweetnpetite]

I don't know why, but I thought it would be cool if everyone who hangs out at the AH just posted to this thread 1 time. (sort of like a roll call I guess.)

Post anything you like. Just make it good. You only get 1 shot!


This is the last time you will see me here.

 

[matriarch]

I'm such a nervous, twitchy individual, no self-confidence, I have a hard job putting a few words together, let alone a whole post that is supposed to indicate the calibre of my person, and character, but I guess if I sat here for a while and thought I could probably come up with something that would indicate to you all what an erudite, perspicacious, witty, charming, intelligent, sensitive, compassionate, humorous individual I am, someone who can use three thousand words to say something that can be said in a few, because it makes me look clever and interesting if I use convoluted sentences, full of asides and parenthesis, which cut the content up so much that its impossible to read and get any sense from it, and having thought about it for all of 30 seconds I came up with my answer:


Hullo. I'm Matriarch.

 

[tolyk]

Hi Matriarch, I'm Tolyk and I had much the same thought as did you. Now, I could go on and on but I'm really not that interesting a person. So I shall say: Everyone check out my pic thread *chuckle*

(I'm also completely shameless)

 

[Liar]

Ain't it grand? Here I have this one shot to bestow my wit upon this thread, and all I can come up with is this bithing about my lack of wit. Well, that's about it. Hello from an AH freeloader, who haven't been an author in months, but still hangs around.

#L

 

[she_is_my_addiction]

"You make me wanna La-La in the kitchen on the floor. I'll be your french maid where I meet you at the door. I'm like an alleycat...drink the milk up I want more."

 

[Kassiana]

This is one of my personal favorite short stories. The title is a blatant crib from a movie I haven't seen.

My Own Private Antarctica

Story notes: I dislike what Marvel did with their "let’s have Rogue leave Remy to die" plotline about Antarctica, so this is my own take on what happened in my X-universe instead.

After the trial, Rogue rose into the air with Gambit, took him outside, then dumped him in the snow and stayed airborne. She looked at her gloved hands, and he slowly picked himself up from the cold hard ground, feeling tears well up from his soul. "What’d you do that for, chere?" he said, bitter, miserable, cold outside and in.

She shook her right hand out. "I just couldn’t take it any more."

"Take what?" Take him? She had defended him! She understood, didn’t she? What was wrong?

Distantly, she said, "I couldn’t take having you so close. You’re in my head, under my skin. And what you did…I’m having a hard time dealing with it."

SHE was having a hard time with it? He gave a bitter laugh. "Try living with having done it, chere."

She turned a hard gaze at him. "I am. Thanks to you," she bit out, forcefully.

Oh. That was different. His heart ached for her. "Chere, I’m so sorry you have to…"

She turned and faced the sun, moving a short distance away from him, and he was gripped with fear. She wouldn’t just leave him here to die, would she? "Rogue, you not goin’, are you?"

She looked at him again. He saw disgust in her gaze and wished he could sink through the snow to avoid it. "No," she said slowly. "Not without you. Even though on some sick level, you want me to. That’d be doing what you did to them. I’m not a killer any more."

He felt queasy. He knelt and vomited into the snow. She watched him, not helping or hindering him. He wiped his mouth and got up again afterward, shaky and ill. Then she lifted him from the ground and flew steadily away.

She didn’t say one word to him for the entire flight.

He tried to get her to talk. He would have preferred anger, loathing, shouting, anything but this frozen silence from her. He needed passion, something to hold on to. All she gave him was quiet, and the cutting frost of the wind. He told her he was sorry. He said he loved her deeply. He railed against his own weaknesses, gave her his feelings, and she flew on without showing any concern for his pain. Finally, he gave up.

Back at the mansion, she put him on the ground, then walked away. She didn’t even look at him. "Rogue?" he called desperately after her.

She didn’t react at all, not even breaking her stride as she swiftly walked away.

The others had seen his trial…apparently Magneto had been "kind" enough to broadcast it to all of them. Wolverine clapped him on the back and took him to a slimy little dive later that night, where they played pool, drank the time away, and got into a few fights. Storm gripped his hand and asked him to trust the group more, that he was a valued team member despite this one mistake from his past. He thanked her. Charles sent a brief telepathic message of support. Some of the others were more diffident, but none of them rejected him outright.

None, that is, but Rogue.

Even after some time, she still was colder than absolute zero to him. She avoided him and ignored him. He pleaded, he railed, he sighed…he might as well have been asking a brick wall for sympathy. He loved her, and she had said she loved him, yet Storm was more kind to him after his trial than Rogue!

He had a revelation, playing poker with Logan at three a.m. Even a small straight couldn’t distract him. Finally he understood why Rogue didn’t leave him in Antarctica. She didn’t have to. She had brought it here with her.

 

[jamesofthedead]

"You make me wanna La-La in the kitchen on the floor. I'll be your french maid where I meet you at the door. I'm like an alleycat...drink the milk up I want more."

Mmmmm Ashlee Simpson... Oh sorry I drifted off there. Damn now I've forgotten the incredibly witty and hilariously funny post I was going to put here.

Oh well.

 

[Guest]

There are no windows in my cave and the entrance, hidden by spells, is around a bend from my lair. I cannot see out from here. From the entrance, though, I can look out over lush pastures full of tasty livestock and farmhouses. In one of the farmhouses lives a fair young maiden, (no I don't want to eat her) she sings with the sweetest of voices. Sometimes I gide down at night and listen to her song. It melts my old weary heart to hear it. If only the sight of my visage would not frighten her. Oh, to have her sing to me...

Inside, I can see my bed of gold, and gems of all sorts, as well as other treasures collected over the centuries. There are a few piles of bones belonging to several species, (I really need to clean someday) and leftovers from dinner. And the collection of weapons and magic books left behind by those who would dare to invade my home in search of a trophy or fame and fortune, or both.

And me. Old and lonely, the brilliant color of my scales fading, from Amethyst to dull grey. I am not much longer for this world, at least not by my time but most of you will be dust before I am gone.

Just one more song...

Just one more....

 

[domjoe]

This morning, I stripped to the waist and serviced our old washing machine. I was sucking the soapy, stagnant water out of the overflow pipe, when my wife told me that she admired men who could suck on something as filthy as that without gagging. I was quite taken aback.

 

[minsue]

I dreamed I saw a tree full of angels up on Primrose Hill
and I flew with them over the great wen 'til I had seen my fill
of such poverty and misery sure to tear my soul apart.
I've got a socialism of the heart.

- Billy Bragg

 

[rgraham666]

I'll simply post my favourite saying, although I doubt you've heard me say it before. It says too much about me, almost like my True Name.

Long live freedom, and damn the ideologies.

 

[carsonshepherd]

I'll post my favorite saying as well. It has many uses in many contexts.

The proper tool for the proper job.

 

[Evil Alpaca]

On the drive out to Georgia, I was driving through northern Louisiana. It was about 6:30 a.m., and the sun was rising and decorating the under-clouds of the horizon with orange, pink and red. A song by Johnny Cash came on on the cd I was listening to . . . It was "Ghost Riders in the Sky," and I listened to the master crooner as the sun got chased up into the sky.

It was definitely a moment.

 

[rikaaim]

Rollcall...

So, rollcall eh? Well, let's do this one a Strongbad style.

Now, we must first start witha the scrollbuttons song...

S to the C, R, O double L. My name is not Norman but still I Rockwell.

Then select a Strongbad email # 128...

Then, the email song...

I met her in the summertime...her name was...EMAIL. (soft high pitch tone)

strongbad_email.exe *click*

*reads email*

Dear Strongbad,

Why is it that you never take rollcall for all of the members of Strongbadia?

Your something,

someone


*answers email*

Well something, why don't you go back to your parents and ask them to give you a freakin real name?!

So, rollcall eh somone? I think I'ma gonna call you Ed. For Erectile Disfunctional someone. Yeah, Ed. So, rollcall, eh Ed?

Well, there is the good 'ol popultion: Tire sign out back, but yeah. It might be nice to gather upa my 'ol minions, er...citizens... and see just what kinda high class people I have here.

Let's see, there is Homsar...yeah like that guy brings a lot to the table.

Then there's the Poopsmith, one word...underpaid.

Then there's my main man a The Cheat. Can you say a The Cheat? *beckons for The Cheat* *kicks The Cheat*

The King of Town, Coach Z, Bubs, and Pom Pom. The obscure ones.

Strongmad, with the IQ of a potato not fully baked yet, and Strongsad, 'ol dumpyface himself.

So, I think we're down to our final two contestes Ed.

Marzipan and Homestar.

I think tonight I'll steal away Marzipan with my incredible awsomeness and then tie her up to my couch, lacking a real bed so it seems, and have my way with her in ways only you Erectile Dysfunctional someone could imagine. Let's just say this flogger I got from the gypsy carnival last year will finaly have a use.

Now for *shudders* Homestar. I swear I've been trying to kill that guy for years. He's just to damn dumb to die. Run him over witha my car. Set 'im on fire. Nothing works. He even failed at trying to kill 'imself. I don't get that guy. No arms. I mean, what's up with that?!

Anyway, that's a everbody Ed. I hope you're happy now. 'Cause I'm not. Paper, bring this train wreck to a close...

*preeeoooowwwwww*

*email strong bad here at strongbad@homestarrunner.com <strongbad@homestarrunner.com> *

 

[nikkijames]

Hmmm. What to say?

I guess the right thing to say in a role call is 'HERE'.




Funny that I was listening to Ashlee Simpson as I ran across SIMA's post.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

This is me, posting on your thread. I've got nothing to say, I've got nothing to do...wait, isn't that a Bad Religion song?

 

[Guest]

I'm a slut, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

I'm a slut, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way

(Edited to add: Taken from "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks. But, I am no bitch. )

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Rolling on the bed, her muscled loins pushed up at him, higher, lifting her ass off the bed and fucking back at him with all her female strength, taking him deep into the tight clutch of her hungry pussy and screwing her hips around to force the head of his cock against every inch of her fevered feminine flesh. She reached up, her nails clawed to scratch his face, but he grabbed her wrist and bore it down; bore her down, his hard male strength slamming her ass into the bed, making her take it, making her lose control till she had no choice but to spread her thighs wide, her back arched as the ineluctable orgasm thundered down upon her and her mouth opened in a soundless scream, her eyes rolled back into her head, and she felt the deep insistent throb of his cock inside her, jetting his thick streams of scalding masculine essence into the darkness of her need with all the irrestible force of raw life itself.

“Did you remember to take the garbage out?” she moaned.

---dr.M.

 

[LadyCibelle]

Too new to have anything to say about anything....too young to care about saying anything....too old to care about what people will think of me....in a word....it's ME

 

[LadyJeanne]

"And, as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."

Nelson Mandela


And a quote from one of my favorite feedback messages:

"P.S. You are no lady - thank God!"

 

[Guest]

 

[cantdog]

If, as seems likely, life is pretty easy to come by, given a good water soup and some energy input, then I suppose we must allow a chemical open door to its formation. A force in the universe is a large assumption, by contrast. I don't ascribe the open door to any such force.

That's personal on my part, but you did ask. I like the open-ended life in the Cambrian seas! So diverse! Whole phyla which have since lost out in the evolutionary struggle. An incredible variety. Life started in so many ways, exuberantly, variously, deliriously.

And it does, as your question implies, depend upon so much serendipity, if you want to look at it that way. Beginning with the gravitational constant which allows an expanding universe which is yet dense enough for population II stars to form, continuing through the ideal temp range for water oceans, and the benign moon, the double planet thing.

But for me, it doesn't look so much like serendipity. I see the immense number of possible planetary and stellar configurations. Maybe it is a rare thing after all. But we, of course, are on a "fortunate" planet in a "fortunate" place, in a "fortunate' sort of universe. We could hardly be otherwise and still be here, if you get me.

How biased the cosmos is toward life depends on how rare our situation is. Whatever the answer to that question may be, it still doesn't imply a force in the universe, much less a benign Providence or any intention in the process.

That's the short answer.

cantdog

Only about five people read that when I posted it earlier. amicus said it was a good answer, even, so I felt it had passed some high water mark for quality bullshit.

your purveyor of quality bullshit

cantdog

 

[impressive]

Yikes! Stage fright. Can't think of anything witty to say, so I'll just post my latest ...

Exit 7
by impressive ©

driving from desire to duty
vision obscured by the distortion
of liquid hope as it again
escapes
softening the crust of dried futility
and the salty taste of tomorrow
on unkissed lips
holding on to life
by nothing stronger than the
surface tension
of a tear

~ ~ ~

 

[BlackShanglan]

One gender-confused horse reporting as called.

Shanglan

 

[Quiet_Cool]

Post where?

Here?

Q_C