Every Dollar Bill, another FIGHT.

[Guest]

I would like to know if anyone's male sig. other is a TOTAL MISER about money. Mine has insane expectations about money and it is ruining our relationship.He believes that all Indian families here and in the USA-have NO debt and they they live perfect lives. He is on a track to compete with these so called "perfect" people. He believes that Americans are NOT perfect, and that we like to have debt. He was recently disgraced at work, when after he bought a new car-the indians there found out he did not pay CASH$$ for the car, but got a loan. They were horrified, and also put him down and laughed in his face.

It doesn't matter that he is paying on a HOME LOAN back in India for his parents, and that he also bought a home here as well. But see, he thinks that he will not be happy until BOTH homes are paid off completely. It is like he won't sleep well at night for the next 30 years. I don't understand this. And I am tired of being told I am a bad-debt loving fool. When in fact I never ask him for ANYTHING but food, shelter and some shampoo to wash with. I am trying to finish my degree. He doesn't seem to have much consideration for this though. I also thought that Indians regard education as a GOD. But when it comes to my OWN edu, he doesn't make it a high priority. He just gives me grief about the small things I need, while making it hard for me to concentrate on my studies.

IF he wants to have 2 incomes, why isn't he investing in me, so that I can get to that point one day???

any thought???

Wonder

 

[KillerMuffin]

Wow.

A new rant from Yoyotwat.

I'm impressed! Creativity! Originality! I almost thought it was someone else for a moment.

*golf clap*

 

[SweetCherry]

Someone find this guy a hobby please? I thikn he needs some serious help.

 

[Nora]

I dunno, KM. I kinda miss the angst of the evil mother-in-law angle on this one. Gave it more drama, less whine.

 

[KillerMuffin]

You're right, Nora. The evil mother-in-law definitely would add a certain tension filled drama to round it off.

I think this one rates a 7 out of 10 in Yoyotwat Rants.

 

[Guest]

I have been with this person for working on 3 years. I am very used to the differences in cultures. We have lived together for 2 years. He would be very happy if I had my own money and worked-but as long as it is not of his expense. And his thing with money is EXTREME-I only listed a few points, but there are hundreds more. When he wants something-he miraculously has money for it. When I need something-he doesn't have the money and he is insulted that I could fathom he might.

Here is a stupid example, but it shows how petty he is. When we go to a store, and while we are waiting in line-if he is hungry or thirsty-he doesn't mind throwing down 2+ dollars on a bag of chips and a coke, that is right next to us in the aisle. I rarely go for the aisle foods, but once I wanted a MILK. It was 98cents. He got really mad and asked why I needed it? Because there was milk in the far back of the store for 87cents. The point is-that when it is convinient for HIM-its ok to spend.

Since I am a student, I rarely have 2 bucks in my pocket-but countless times when we are out-he will ask me for it-because he wants a coffee or ice cream, and he doesn't want to stop at an ATM. (he never carries cash) I never act selfish, or hesitate I always give it to him. But the man can see no significance in this.

And I do think that saying americans are debt ridden etc...is a generalization. There are plenty of people working hard, saving and building. Since I am NOT the stereotype-I do not need to be treated like this-especially since I have been with this person 3 years. I do not believe that a person should ever have to adjust to another persons selfishness.

 

[Nora]

I'd give him 8 outta 10 if he'd change it from being disgraced at work to having his mother be shamed in the eyes of the community by his car loan and then blaming it on the wife's desire to live above their means.

 

[KillerMuffin]

I think, additionally, he'd have to remove the word "selfishness" and work around it to get an 8. He's getting preachy now and he's losing his original message. I'm feeling a little less sympathy with him. He's sliding back into a low 6.

If he could work in realistic examples, that would certainly help. Perhaps if he could use the ethnic colloquialisms?

 

[Siren]

 

[Nora]

6.5 just for using the expression "bad-debt loving fool" though. It's the stuff hokey country songs are made of.

But you're right. It's definitely missing the charm and whimsey that the ethnic colloquialisms add.

Actually, Rupi's story sounded more like a genuine Yoyo Production than this one. Hrm...

 

[Siren]