Englishman in Australia Confused about which way is up

[MattWolf]

Frisky flirty friendly Englishman, aged somewhere between 42 and 44, in a hotel somewhere in Australia.

Imagining a warm smooth body slipping between my sheet - virtually, really, actually, fictionally, figuratively, deliciously. Mmmmm... pardon me while I pause to imagine that...

 

[MattWolf]

I'm half asleep (jet lag?) and feel a lifting, a slight coolness, a moving of the mattress and then.... mmmmmpff... that soft, sensual warmth of skin upon skin as a body slides in beside me.

 

[MattWolf]

I close my eyes and luxuriate in the feeling alone as I feel her hand run slowly and delicately along my body, over my hips, onto my arse.

I wonder what this stranger looks like.

 

[MattWolf]

I roll over, heart thumping with anticipation to see you, only for you to laugh and reach out and cover my eyes

 

[BootieKittie]

I like how you're telling yourself a story.

 

[MattWolf]

I like how you're telling yourself a story.

Indeed, well, nobody else was joining in so I had to make it up all on my own. But you are very welcome to follow along Kittie.

 

[MattWolf]

Oh dear, I'm stuck telling myself stories...

 

[ashesatwork]

this one time at band camp...

 

[MattWolf]

this one time at band camp...

That is probably a reference to something I don't get....

 

[ashesatwork]

That is probably a reference to something I don't get....

ugh english men cant watch funny american movies... ??

 

[MattWolf]

ugh english men cant watch funny american movies... ??

we can, but we need to get permission from the foreign office first

 

[ashesatwork]

we can, but we need to get permission from the foreign office first

ok so maybe you wont find it as funny as americans maybe? but total comedy classic for sure.

 

[MattWolf]

Back home but body clock all weirded out, so awake toooo early. Anyone like to keep me company?

 

[Ashley81]

I like your sense of humour.

 

[Ashley81]

Maybe I'll just start talking to myself too.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Up? If you're west of Alice, it's directly to your left.

 

[MattWolf]

Maybe I'll just start talking to myself too.

I think it is underrated. You spend more time with yourself than anyone else so it is always good if you can get along

 

[Ashley81]

I think you're right. I've had some great conversations with myself. You?

 

[MattWolf]

I think you're right. I've had some great conversations with myself. You?

Sure. I've also had conversations with myself that I've walked out on in a seething mess, slamming the door and such like. But have always kissed and made up.

 

[Ashley81]

Well that's lucky. I imagine it would make things very complicated if you were to stay angry and refuse to be in the same room with yourself.

 

[MattWolf]

Well that's lucky. I imagine it would make things very complicated if you were to stay angry and refuse to be in the same room with yourself.

Indeed. Especially if you were staying in a single room in a hotel or camping or something

 

[Ashley81]

I suppose so. At home you could at least go and sleep on the sofa or something, but in a single room in a hotel you'd be stuck having to share a bed with yourself.

 

[MattWolf]

I suppose so. At home you could at least go and sleep on the sofa or something, but in a single room in a hotel you'd be stuck having to share a bed with yourself.

You paint a complex picture. This metaphor could extend into solo makeup sex with oneself.

I should add I also like talking to other people. Fancy a chat?

 

[Ashley81]

I need to go offline for an hour or two but later?

 

[MattWolf]

I need to go offline for an hour or two but later?

I'll be at work I'm afraid so you'll either have to talk to yourself or find somebody else in the fine land of lit