Dunna

[Starfish]

I know I haven't been around much, so I am obviously not a good friend, but I just want to say I wish you (Beetleboy) and your Queen, the best of luck. I hope that you are aware that the average offspring rate for a weevil is 300 youngens per litter. Maybe you should take out those Gerber grow up plans, just so you can send them to college.

Seriously though, Congratulations!

 

[Weevil]

Baby steps kiddo.

Don't worry about it all at once. If she wants to take your name she does, if she doesn't she doesn't. That's not a difficult one.

Going out with the guys 4 nights a week, well that's up to your relationship.

Don't throw all your worries into the pot in one night. Makes for some evil brew.

Okay but will my Mom be upset if she doesn't? Will her Parents be upset if she does?

I don't actually spend 4 nights with the guys but I theoretically could. I don't suppose that'll happen.

I should probably come down a bit but in one of the two scenarios for my life after tonight I have only about 2 or 3 hours left of being allowed this rumination.

And how can I be a good Dad when I never had one? And

*EBW's puny insect brain collapses, steam shoots from ears*

 

[Weevil]

I know I haven't been around much, so I am obviously not a good friend, but I just want to say I wish you (Beetleboy) and your Queen, the best of luck. I hope that you are aware that the average offspring rate for a weevil is 300 youngens per litter. Maybe you should take out those Gerber grow up plans, just so you can send them to college.

Seriously though, Congratulations!

Shucks, everyone is a good friend as far as I'm concerned. Thanks for the congrats but christ, Woman!!! I don't need to think about 300 kids?? Where will I find the cotton to feed them all?? College??

*Brain collapses again, Steam shoots from every orifice*

 

[lavender]

 

[Weevil]

Sure, thanks Lav. I have an Idea that things'll probably work out for the best.

Yeesh, could you imagine a kid growing up with me as his Male role model??? Or what if it's a girl? How long until I'm the one saying "You touch her and I'll put my foot so far up your ass they'll call you Nike breath"?

I should probably stop before my brain melts again.

 

[Starfish]

Oh shit. Sorry. I will donate all of my old cotton dresses to feed your babies.

No you're a human. You're maxing out around what? 7?

I don't know the record, but it's probably not that bad.

Just relax there guy.

I have a bunch of pets and that is like having a bunch of perpetual infants, and well, no, even though I don't have to carry them ALL to bed, but for usually at least 2 or 3, I do have to guess when their bitching is because they are hungry or they want attention. Hell, I even have to deal with their shit all of the time, just like a baby.


If I can do it, so can you!

You're fine. Smile. You could be a DADDY to be!

 

[Weevil]

If I can do it, so can you!

You're fine. Smile. You could be a DADDY to be!

Oh sweet jesus. Obviously you aren't that close or you'd know I have problems taking care of my Socks!!!!!!!!!

Oh sweet lord.

Hmmmm, should the kids be sent to Catholic school or Aigh! No lets think about other things.

 

[Weevil]

Well goodnight y'all, thanks for those who offered congrats and I'll update you the next time I'm on as to my possible impending fatherhood and Husbandhood. Who knows????

 

[Starfish]

Look, I am even getting stressed. MR. GR is going to rub my back, so while I am gone, BREATH, and listen to the voice of reason. Her name is lavender, and she is your friend. Just chant her name..
Inhale:Say it while exhaling.......
lavender
Repeat: in *lavender* out
Repeat: in *lavender* out
Repeat: in *lavender* out


Think about boobies too! That will help!