Dungeons and Revelations

Dixon Carter Lee

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Nov 22, 1999
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My wife let slip to a neighbor, a nice, young woman, about 28, who teaches piano to kids, living alone, that I'm an atheist. They were just chatting, and it came out as an off-hand comment, and this poor thing looked at me VERY confused. She wasn't quite sure what an atheist was, but she knew it was something like "agnostic".

"So, it means you hate God?" she asked me.

My wife suddenly remembered that this girl is very Christian (Catholic, even), and thisclose to being born again.

"No." I said. "It has nothing to do with hate."

Later she told my wife that I'm now just one more person she has to pray for. She seemed so, um, sympathetic towards me (like most faithful do), as if I just hadn't heard the word LOUD enough, poor dear.

My wife is Christian, but has big problems with the Pope, and with the Catholic assertion that you can't get into Heaven without embracing Jesus. "What about people in a South American forest who just haven't gotten a copy of the Bible, yet? They go to Hell?" she asked this girl. "They'll have their chance at the Second Coming", the girl replied.

I have to tell you, as much as I respect people of faith, I still can't get around anyone seriously believing in the New Testament version of armagedon and apocalypse, outlined in the Gospels and in Revaltions. I understand that to have faith it helps to go for the whole package, but Revelations just reads like a Problem Child satire of Nostrodamus -- brilliant, evocative, but, really, just hysterically funny. As much as I respect faith I just can't take anyone who thinks a lamb with seven eyes means anything seriously.

To me it's like that old Tom Hanks movie where he starts thinking Dungeons and Dragons is real. Talking to this girl is now going to be like talking to that guy. I just can't get past people who talk about the Rapture and the Seventh Seal with such earnestness. It's like reading a role playing thread.

PROPHET: "Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six."

DRAKO THE WIZARD: "I invoke the Invisibilty Charm and escape the Beast."

O.O.C.

I forget, does the Anti-christ carry the Golden Shield of Wisdom, or did he lose that in the Doomed Forest?

Are you Christian? How do you reconcile Revelations?
 
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You've just gotta have faith, DCL.

I'm praying for you, man.
 
Rona Jaffe's Mazes and Monsters , btw. The book was only slightly better.

My sympathies on your mythologically bound neighbor. Wait 'til she expresses surprise that you celebrate Thanksgiving. That's always my favorite.
 
I'm used to that same reaction... I actually almost gave my Gramma a heart attack when she found out I'm atheist.. it was kinda sad
 
Nora said:
Wait 'til she expresses surprise that you celebrate Thanksgiving. That's always my favorite.

Or that I have a Xmas tree. Or that I read Bible stories to my kids. Or that I have morals.

Or that I don't have a cloven hoof.
 
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PROPHET: "Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six."

DRAKO THE WIZARD: "I invoke the Invisibilty Charm and escape the Beast."

O.O.C.

I forget, does the Anti-christ carry the Golden Shield of Wisdom, or did he lose that in the Doomed Forest?


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Ok that was hysterical.

Ok Revelations honestly scared the shit out of me as a child. I looked for the mark of the beast on everyone I met. I had nightmares about armegedon until I was 10 because I thought half my family was going to burn in hell for enternity, at which point my father decided that expecting me to embrace two different faiths at such a young age was rediculous and gave me a choice between CCD and Hebrew School. I jumped on Hebrew School.

As I got older I started to see all the contradicitions and I got over it. But I still have the occasional nightmare.

I could never embrace a religion that encompased so much fear.
 
I had one little girl with whom I used to walk home from school tell me that she couldn't talk to me anymore because I don't believe in Jesus and therefore I'd be going to hell.

We were um...11-ish at the time.

I think a cloven hoof could come in handy, although not as much as horns would.
 
Are you people......
ATHIEST......or
AGNOSTICK

Do you fight against the fact that there is or could have ever been a God.

Or are you the type that doesn't feel you have enpugh proof to say there is one,,,,but not enough proof to say therw isn't either????
 
I'm an atheist. An atheist doesn't accept the burden of proof regarding the existence of God, just as we don't accept the burden of proof regarding the existence of Giant Pink Sea Snails.
 
Nora said:
Rona Jaffe's Mazes and Monsters , btw. The book was only slightly better.

My sympathies on your mythologically bound neighbor. Wait 'til she expresses surprise that you celebrate Thanksgiving. That's always my favorite.


Just be careful which ones ya read to them. There's big chunks of the O.T. that'll scar 'em for life.

Ever read the whole story of Lot?
 
gotdatmony said:
Are you people......
ATHIEST......or
AGNOSTICK

Do you fight against the fact that there is or could have ever been a God.

Or are you the type that doesn't feel you have enpugh proof to say there is one,,,,but not enough proof to say therw isn't either????

Me people ain't either. (that actually hurt)

I believe in god. I just don't believe in organized religion. It's unecessary. I don't need a human coduit to god. I AM a human conduit to god. Anyone who believes is. Organized religion is about power and money. Nothing more.
 
Whore of Babylon

Hey, the Whore of Babylon is great at pulling trains. You should see it when the Beast with Seven Cocks, each of which comes seven times, fucks her in every orifice imaginable-- and a few which aren't.
:p
 
I've been going through tough times myself, what with being the only atheist at a Christian college.


I gave a speech in class about why I was an atheist. I told them flat out, "I'm an atheist simply because all organized religions believe that they are the only religion that will allow you into heaven, and that all others are hell-bound. Atheism has nothing to do with hating God. Atheism is, quite simply, not acknowleging God's presence."

I then gave them a quote from Stephen Roberts:

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all of the other possible gods, then you'll understand why I dismiss yours."

I've been ostracized ever since. People kept asking, "If you don't believe in God, then why go to a Christian school?"

My answer was simple: "I come here because it's 20 miles from home."
 
REDWAVE said:
Hey, the Whore of Babylon is great at pulling trains. You should see it when the Beast with Seven Cocks, each of which comes seven times, fucks her in every orifice imaginable-- and a few which aren't.

I am not prepared for a funny REDWAVE.
 
Dixon Carter Lee said:
I'm an atheist. An atheist doesn't accept the burden of proof regarding the existence of God, just as we don't accept the burden of proof regarding the existence of Giant Pink Sea Snails.


Great, now I have Dr. Doolitte stuck in my head.

"If we could TALK to the animals grunt and squeak and squak with the animals!"
 
Dixon Carter Lee said:
I'm an atheist. An atheist doesn't accept the burden of proof regarding the existence of God, just as we don't accept the burden of proof regarding the existence of Giant Pink Sea Snails.


Yes, but can you prove there are no Giant Pink Sea Snails?

Maybe they're just really, really small, so you can't see them.
 
I agree with you sunstruck....organized religion for the sake of organized religion,,,sucks....
Thats why there are so many "denominations"....each one is just another mans iterpritation of what he thought he read,,,,then explaining his interpretation to others so that they will see it his way....and help him build a building and so on and a water park and so on and a recording studio and so on and a tv station
 
APhil,

Very lucid post. I've often liked those quotes, and I like the way you use the word "acknowledge" instead of "believe", which so often send the faithful into a tizzy.

Regarding your being ostracized, remember that we are, effectively, calling 98% of the people in the world delusional. That position is often (I think rightfully) seen as arrogant, as well as (wrongfully) antagonistic.
 
Aphil, you're a trouble maker.

All those people want to do is go to college and not have to think; why are you screwing that up for them?

Btw, I liked your quote.
 
No you didn't. I am being antagonistic in this thread to anyone who takes Revelations as prophecy. What I said was my atheism is not, in itself, an antagonistic life choice, which many faithful feel. I understand why they feel that way, but, honestly, it's not about their faith, but my convictions.
 
Thanks DCL and sandia...

I sometimes take a sort of evil pleasure in watching them make a decision based on whether or not the Bible says they can.

Is that wrong?:p
 
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