Down the Rabbit Hole

[jeff_is_smiling]

Second one:

The outside world will never understand that submission is not subjugation to another person. It's letting yourself be free of all those things that hold you back from experiencing the greatest sexual pleasures.

Michelle Hughes

 

[LucianaGrace]

My small contributions.

First one:

"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."

Howard Thurman

This one is so…it hits home. Thank you for contributing, Jeff. It’s always a delight to see you.

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

This one is so…it hits home. Thank you for contributing, Jeff. It’s always a delight to see you.

Thank you, Luciana. it is also enjoyable to see you posting.

 

[LucianaGrace]

Second one:

The outside world will never understand that submission is not subjugation to another person. It's letting yourself be free of all those things that hold you back from experiencing the greatest sexual pleasures.

Michelle Hughes

This is interesting. I’ve taken some time to ponder it. It’s very true, for me at least.

What I’ve found is that the roles can be too strictly upheld. ‘I’m the Dom, I always have to be this way’, or ‘I’m the sub, so I always have to be this way’. But that is so far from the truth for me. Sometimes those roles need to be flexible. Sometimes a Dom needs to be nurtured, supported, allowed to break in the arms of their sub. And sometimes the sub needs a space to be brave, to say what is true for them, and to have the dynamic where their word is final.

We ebb and flow, that is true for all. And when we’re free to accept and express this within all relationships, but for this context the D/s, THAT is true freedom. Well, for me anyway.

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

This is interesting. I’ve taken some time to ponder it. It’s very true, for me at least.

What I’ve found is that the roles can be too strictly upheld. ‘I’m the Dom, I always have to be this way’, or ‘I’m the sub, so I always have to be this way’. But that is so far from the truth for me. Sometimes those roles need to be flexible. Sometimes a Dom needs to be nurtured, supported, allowed to break in the arms of their sub. And sometimes the sub needs a space to be brave, to say what is true for them, and to have the dynamic where their word is final.

We ebb and flow, that is true for all. And when we’re free to accept and express this within all relationships, but for this context the D/s, THAT is true freedom. Well, for me anyway.

Smart women are yummy...

 

[LucianaGrace]

Sarah McLachlan ~ Possession

Listen as the wind blows
From across the great divide
Voices trapped in yearning
Memories trapped in time
The night is my companion
And solitude my guide
Would I spend forever here
And not be satisfied

And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd, wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes dear

Through this world I've stumbled
So many times betrayed
Trying to find an honest word
To find the truth enslaved
Oh you speak to me in riddles and
You speak to me in rhymes
My body aches to breathe your breath
Your words keep me alive

And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd, wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes, dear

Into this night I wander
It's morning that I dread
Another day of knowing of
The path I fear to tread
Oh, into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
Nothing stands between us here
And I won't be denied

And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd, wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes dear

I'll hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
And after I'd wipe away the tears
Just close your eyes

 

[LucianaGrace]

Kelly Clarkson ~ Hear Me
Hear me
Hear me

You gotta be out there
You gotta be somewhere
Wherever you are
I'm waiting (oh)
'Cause there are these nights when
I sing myself to sleep
And I'm hopin' my dreams
Bring you close to me
Are you listening?

Hear me, I'm cryin' out, I'm ready now
Turn my world upside down, find me
I'm lost inside the crowd, it's getting loud
I need you to see, I'm screaming for you to please
Hear me
(Hear me)
(Hear me)
Can you hear me?
(Hear me, oh)

I used to be scared of
Letting someone in
But it gets so lonely
Being on my own
No one to talk to
And no one to hold me
I'm not always strong
Oh, I need you here
Are you listening?

Hear me, I'm cryin' out, I'm ready now
Turn my world upside down, find me
I'm lost inside the crowd, it's getting loud
I need you to see, I'm screaming for you to please
Hear me

I'm restless and wild
I fall, but I try
I need someone to understand (can you hear me?)
I'm lost in my thoughts
And baby, I've fought
For all that I've got
Can you hear me?

Hear me, I'm cryin' out, I'm ready now
Turn my world upside down, find me
I'm lost inside the crowd, it's getting loud
I need you to see, I'm screaming for you to please
Hear me
Hear me, hear me, hear me
Can you hear me?
Hear me, hear me, hear me
Can you hear me? Oh, oh no

Hear me
Hear me
Hear me

 

[LucianaGrace]

Alan Watts ~ Falling in Love.

 

[LucianaGrace]

Brent Morgan ~ The Fixer
She's a fixer with no one to fix her
She's a lover who won't love herself
She's a heartbreak away from a horrible place
'Cause fixers never fix themselves

She's a fighter with no one beside her
In a corner alone on the ropes
She's a let down away from a terrible place
She'll fix every scar but her own

Oh, she fixes the lonely, fixes the broke
But tends to forget who needs fixin' the most
Buried in bandages, hiding the hell
'Cause fixers never fix themselves

She's a liar, a calm to the fire
Shamed when we all follow suit
She's a whisper away from a dangerous place
'Cause lies aren't a fix for the truth

Oh, she fixes the lonely, fixes the broke
But tends to forget who need fixin' the most
Packed with prescriptions, disguisin' the hell
'Cause fixers never fix themselves

She's a handful
A whole lot to handle
But worth every thorn in my side

She's a sunset away from the darkest of days
No fix for the fixer tonight
She's a sunset away from the darkest of days
No fix for the fixer tonight

 

[LucianaGrace]

…

 

[Mtnmike]

You go lady, let it all out !!!! I know where you're coming from, even though I've been married forever, all I do is give & give but when I need a kind word or an ear to listen, you think their there, O No, their do busy of could care less. So yeah I understand & if you ever need a shoulder to cry on or someone to vent to, I'll be here for you.

 

[LucianaGrace]

There’s got to be more to life.

There must be.

It has been over 3 years since I have stopped. Life ran away from me, as it did with most. I was forced to silence who I am to simply get by with social pleasantries and expectations. Work became everything. I lived to work. It was what I could control. It’s what I needed to keep up. And I’m not ashamed to say I lost myself to it. In the craziness of everything, I fell head first into the numbness that allowed me to survive.

Survive, yes. I have finally stopped long enough to see that for what it is…I was surviving.

And with this pause, my entire being is thawing. And I look around with my eyes connected to my soul, and don’t recognise my reality. I don’t recognise where I am…who I am.

I am not foolish enough to claim I know more than most. So, I listen, observe, and slowly tune in to the frequencies of this new place, this new version of myself. I listen to the honest knowledge whispered by all. Some say that life is purely for living. The simplicity of it unnerves me.

How?

How?

How can one achieve that? In a world where I have found myself having to bury who I am simply to make sure funds meet social demands.

Is that life? Being numb?

In the deepest parts of myself, I simply can’t accept it. I am a being of passion cursed to numb oneself simply to get by. Cursed to suppress the core of myself…passion…to live purely within my mind with the inability to express it. But surely, if that passion exists, life must also include a means to allow it to be free?

I have always called it my longing…a psychic version of myself that exists within my dream state. Where it is free to live as love incarnate. The energy of love entwining to create the purest light.

Then I wake to an existence where it is wrong to feel that way, let alone be that way.

What is life if I cannot love freely? Or be loved freely in return? To allow that passion to exist in the manifestation of adoring…allowing myself to be vulnerable to adore someone, and be adored in return. To be the kings and queens of ourselves...the gods and goddesses…who we authentically and undeniably are.

Life surely can’t be about denying that aspect of myself, because…well, why else does it exist so strongly within me? It is no longer willing to be suppressed, ignored, numbed…and yet I can’t find a way for it to exist in tangent with this life I have currently.

Or perhaps the dream state is where it must exist, only to reach out to phantom memories of touches, whispers, and undeniable creation. There is a school of thought that one cannot imagine anything they have not experienced. And I am surely not intelligent enough to ‘make this up’.

So here it is, the meanderings of a lost, fractured soul. Perhaps phantoms can become reality. One hopes so, at least...for what else is there?

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

You are a most interesting, thoughtful, and articulate woman. This was brilliantly written. I have no answers for you except to say that, perhaps, you are trying too hard? In sports, sometimes players are coached to, "let the game come to them." I wonder if it is possible to let life just come to you?

Like the saying "a watched pot never boils," perhaps a focused longing never materializes - at least while focusing on it?

I'm no sage and have no wisdom that can help. This is just a musing of mine after reading your moving and fascinating description...

 

[LucianaGrace]

A focused longing never materialises…thats quite a profound observation. Almost divinely cruel, in a way. To imagine is to breathe life, but to focus is to hinder.

I may need some time to ponder this.

Sincerely, thank you Jeff.
https://media.giphy.com/media/bLTswogayW1Ne/giphy.gif

 

[Deleted member 1306910]

A focused longing never materialises…thats quite a profound observation. Almost divinely cruel, in a way. To imagine is to breathe life, but to focus is to hinder.

I may need some time to ponder this.

Sincerely, thank you Jeff.
https://media.giphy.com/media/bLTswogayW1Ne/giphy.gif

For what it might be worth, you know how deep my longing was. How heavy my loneliness. I gave up Lucy. I decided to let go of everything and drift away. But then, she found me. Not a tribe, but a single person who see's me and doesn't reject me or run away.

Only when I had become content to let it all go.

 

[LucianaGrace]

For what it might be worth, you know how deep my longing was. How heavy my loneliness. I gave up Lucy. I decided to let go of everything and drift away. But then, she found me. Not a tribe, but a single person who see's me and doesn't reject me or run away.

Only when I had become content to let it all go.

I always knew you’d find your tribe. And yes, a tribe can consist of 2.
I‘m so happy for you, Nev…truly.

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

A focused longing never materialises…thats quite a profound observation. Almost divinely cruel, in a way. To imagine is to breathe life, but to focus is to hinder.

I may need some time to ponder this.

Sincerely, thank you Jeff.
https://media.giphy.com/media/bLTswogayW1Ne/giphy.gif

You are very welcome. I hope you find comfort...soon...

https://64.media.tumblr.com/de3a4ce128fbc2a1ba1ddaa260c2763e/94a7d138fe1e9fa2-7c/s540x810/9a21cc2f36f3adc804dfa6fc9858595ed4577fa1.gifv

 

[LucianaGrace]

Phantom Lover


There is bliss to be found in this moment between dream and dawning consciousness. All is well, all is peace, all is light. My soul sighs in its joy, expanding to fully embrace this moment...freedom…it reaches further as I feel myself becoming lost within it, willing it to encompass me. Freedom…freedom of self.

It is you that pulls me back from the bliss, your arm wrapping around my form and pressing as close as you can. It was your touch that brought me back, but your energy that floods me with a need to stay. Safe, nurturing…you are my home, my mirror, my deepest soul connection. Your hands grip around me tighter, and I smile…warmth caressing my heart as I push back against your naked form, delighting in your innocent, unmasked, unconscious state. I attempt to peer over my shoulder to catch a glimpse of you. All I can see is the tuff of hair pressed against my shoulder. Your deep, even breath cascades across my skin as you nuzzle into me. My smile broadens…with all your tough and ruggedness, you can’t keep your gentle nature masked as you sleep. You are adorable in your need for me, though I’d never admit that word choice directly to you.

Poets attempt to describe the need for closeness, yet few capture its intensity. It’s not a need to be close, but a demand to be one. You overwhelm me…everything you are intoxicating and enrapturing. I spin in your grip to face you, my fingers smoothing away the stray follicles that cover your face. I take this moment to allow myself to be lost in you…in your everything. Do you feel this way? Does your need for me overwhelm you as it does me? Do you…no, you don’t overthink as I do...that is my burden.

The need for unity burns gently within my soul, my thigh rising to shift across you as if on instinct. My fingertips trail across your skin: down your cheek, stubbled jawline, neck, and along the expanse of your broad shoulder. My very being shivers in delight at merely touching you. And my eyes close as I allow myself to drown in this moment, in you, in us. I offer a silent prayer to the universe along with my heart filled with gratitude.

And in all your divine cheekiness, you interrupt me...your smile pressing against my breast as you nuzzle closer still, your sleepy eyes twinkling to reveal the mischievous intents that dance within your mind.

 

[LucianaGrace]

Just wanting to get this wondering out of my head…

Non-sexual PTSD and submissives:

• Does the inherent nature of submissives impact the healing process of PTSD? Hmmm, not worded exactly right. The nature of submissives, their tendencies and needs, does that support or hinder PTSD recovery?
• If so, how?
• Can the dynamic of D/s relationships help submissives recover from PTSD, including non-sexual PTSD?
• If so, and a submissive doesn’t have a D, does that hinder recovery?
• Fuck, is recovery even possible?

If you have any thoughts on the above, please feel free to share here or in a DM. I’ve been trying to nut this out for so long and don’t seem to be getting anywhere.

Thanks.

Lucy

 

[cascadiabound]

Just wanting to get this wondering out of my head…

Non-sexual PTSD and submissives:

• Does the inherent nature of submissives impact the healing process of PTSD? Hmmm, not worded exactly right. The nature of submissives, their tendencies and needs, does that support or hinder PTSD recovery?

I think it can support recovery, but it is not a given that it can/will.

• If so, how?

If submission is one path to feeling safe and seen and having a partner (D/PYL) who has taken care to know you and hear your past traumas and then take the next step to learn with you what enhances the submissive's sense of safety and reduction of anxiety - that combination seems highly likely to reduce symptoms related to PTSD. D/s dynamic may also be a framework for management of symptoms and having tools/techniques to address moments of heightened PTSD symptoms.

• Can the dynamic of D/s relationships help submissives recover from PTSD, including non-sexual PTSD?

See above. Yes, I think it's possible.

• If so, and a submissive doesn’t have a D, does that hinder recovery?
• Fuck, is recovery even possible?

I think that symptoms can be reduced. Maybe think of managing PTSD to be akin to working on pushing cancer into remission. It doesn't go away, but it becomes much less front and center and in the best cases the symptoms rarely re-emerge.

If you have any thoughts on the above, please feel free to share here or in a DM. I’ve been trying to nut this out for so long and don’t seem to be getting anywhere.

Thanks.

Lucy

Good luck puzzling this out Lucy.

 

[13Fantasies]

Just wanting to get this wondering out of my head…

Non-sexual PTSD and submissives:

• Does the inherent nature of submissives impact the healing process of PTSD? Hmmm, not worded exactly right. The nature of submissives, their tendencies and needs, does that support or hinder PTSD recovery?

• 
  
  I would say it supports recovery, especially with a Dom that understands the trauma. Someone who can help offer comfort and guidance...maybe more mentor but respected enough by the submissive to allow for a firm approach when necessary.
  
  

  [*]If so, how?

  
  I think that every dynamic should have the base of friendship. Even if it started sexual/romantic, the building blick of any success should be in a friendship model. By gaining trust ans knowledge outside the bedroom or context, it allows for growth and recovery.
  
  

  [*]Can the dynamic of D/s relationships help submissives recover from PTSD, including non-sexual PTSD?

  
  Without a doubt.
  
  As long as both parties understand how this needs to function and what specifically the submissive needs for recovery and growth. Understanding will be the main key here, especially on the part of the Dominant
  
  

  [*]If so, and a submissive doesn’t have a D, does that hinder recovery?

  
  No. It might take longer and feel less achievable, but the fact that the submissive knows they have PTSD and needs help will always be a good first step. Then, when a good Dom enters the picture, the submissive can interplay them into the recovery plans.
  
  

  [*]Fuck, is recovery even possible?

  
  Always, but the person has to both want and believe it is possible.
  

If you have any thoughts on the above, please feel free to share here or in a DM. I’ve been trying to nut this out for so long and don’t seem to be getting anywhere.

Thanks.

Lucy

Any time you need to talk, hun, you know where I am.

Ive been there before because even Dominant personalities have PTSD issues and need help.

I also have a friend in a similar predicament currently trying to overcome some trauma. And though shes submissive, shes managing without a Dom.

Best of luck, hun.