Don't Slap The Pope, on Zoom!

[JackLuis]

Jeffrey Toobin, Put Your Pants On And GET OUT

By now you've already died of cringe — but you got better! — reading about the legal commentator accidentally masturbating on camera during a meeting with his New Yorker co-workers. Well, the masturbation wasn't accidental. Apparently Toobin took advantage of a breakout session to get in a little "me time." But he failed to turn the camera off, and in fact seems to have inadvertently angled it toward his crotch in an attempt to get a better look at whatever media inspired him to take out his penis and touch it during work hours.

"I made an embarrassingly stupid mistake, believing I was off-camera. I apologize to my wife, family, friends and co-workers," Toobin told Vice, which broke the story.

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[JackLuis]

New Yorker Suspends Jeffrey Toobin for Masturbating on Zoom Call

How to sink a career with a flesh torpedo!