Dom/mes: Pushing your own limits

[zipman]

Often, discussions of pushing limits views this from a sub's perspective. However, one aspect that is not discussed too frequently are Dom/mes pushing their own limits.

I used to view face slapping as a hard limit. However, I did want to try it and see what the allure was. I have to admit that when I did slap her face, it didn't turn me on as much as when she instantly presented her face for the next slap. Seeing that level of submission was extrememly erotic in that context.

While face slapping is still not something I choose to do frequently, it was great pushing myself past that limit.


How about the rest of you Dom/mes (or Tops so RR doesn't feel excluded). How and when do you push your own limits?

 

[Shadowsdream]

Often, discussions of pushing limits views this from a sub's perspective. However, one aspect that is not discussed too frequently are Dom/mes pushing their own limits.

I used to view face slapping as a hard limit. However, I did want to try it and see what the allure was. I have to admit that when I did slap her face, it didn't turn me on as much as when she instantly presented her face for the next slap. Seeing that level of submission was extrememly erotic in that context.

While face slapping is still not something I choose to do frequently, it was great pushing myself past that limit.


How about the rest of you Dom/mes (or Tops so RR doesn't feel excluded). How and when do you push your own limits?

Actually face slapping was a limit for Me as well...goes way back in My family history of listening too much to My sisters limits....arghhh!
The first slap was done in a soft hesitation but the instant drop to subspace on the face of My slave caused Me to do an instant 360....on this new tool. I have found that I particularly enjoy face slapping (him) when he is blindfolded..a limit has been overcome for the betterment of this particular relationship.
Knife play was also a limit that I have transcended due to the level of trust this slut has in Me..the original NO way..to a Maybe..to a gotta try it...has now become a wonderful addition to edgy play on those extra Bitch Domme days that come over Me.

 

[kayte]

Zipman ~ Thank you for starting the thread.

 

[Quint]

Amazingly, face slapping was somewhat of a limit to T as well--a mental limit. He didn't want to admit that he was getting anything out of it, although he continued to do it because he knew how much I did. He's over it now.

The thought of pissing on me was foreign to him for the first few months of our relationship. Didn't think he'd find anything erotic about it. He's over that one, too.

He also did not particularly want to do any NC, hate-fucking, or serious anger play, for various history reasons--upbringing, previous girlfriends, etc. We're slowly building into that; at present we can start while already in bed and make it NC (hateful, angry) but I'm hoping eventually to get the foreplay involved too. For getting past this limit to work, it has to be slow and gradual, and unfortunately that's a lot harder when we only see each other every other month.

 

[P. B. Walker]

Humiliation used to be a hard limit for me. But with the right person I have no problems with some light humilation, all verbal of course. I still have concerns with some types of humiliation and degradation, but it's not a "no way, no how" type situation anymore.

PBW

 

[Goddess Helena]

Verbal humilation was difficult for me to adjust to. Something that took a solid trusting relationship for Me to become comfortable with.
Face slapping is still something that I am not fond of. However, there is time.


Helena

 

[Netzach]

Urethral sounds were a huge one for me, they were the only scene I ever had to leave a room over. But I felt compelled to go watch again...and watch again....and finally I had a chance to use them on my fiance and I had a great time doing it!

Catheterization has taken the "ew, no way" place of urethral sounds, and who knows I may feel the same way about it, eventually.

I have no porblem peeing on, bitchslapping, degrading, or "hatefucking" someone, as long as I know they will be favorably receptive to it, which makes me kind of a tentative sado.

 

[zipman]

Thanks to all who posted!

I guess the reason that this thought popped into my head was because it was only recently that I began thinking of my limits. So much of the BDSM literature out there focuses mostly on the limits of the sub, as if these are the only limits that need to be considered, or pushed for that matter.

When I did begin thinking of my limits, it really made me rethink a lot of my views.

Anyone feel the same way?

 

[Ebonyfire]

Spitting

as well as face slapping is not high on my list. I now have sub who does not mind these things, so I guess these limits are not limits after all.

I have not worked up to the spitting...yet.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Spitting

as well as face slapping is not high on my list. I now have sub who does not mind these things, so I guess these limits are not limits after all.

I have not worked up to the spitting...yet.

Ah ha spitting!
A limit I never think of but one that I doubt I will push for Myself...even if it were the kink of a submissive under My control.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Spitting

Ah ha spitting!
A limit I never think of but one that I doubt I will push for Myself...even if it were the kink of a submissive under My control.

I know what you mean, I am thinking hard about that one. However, I would rather do that than play with knives. In the neighborhood where I grew up, knives were not toys. If you used one it was for a purpose.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Interesting bump