Does size really matter?

[MisterSir]

OK, hands up all of you who thought this was going to be about penis size. I'm talking about height, nothing more, nothing less.

Every so often, I'll pick a big city and look at that city's Craigslist entries for the relationship section (women for men, men for women, erotic services and such and such) because it's actually quite entertaining. Aside from the few entries made by people who are either absolutely nuts or utter liars, it's proven to be rather enlightening because I'm seeing trends in what crops up - you get a lot of "good sense of humour", "good personality" (which is fairly misleading anyway) and "attractive", but "tall" is quite a common request as well and that's what I'm making this topic about.

So tell me, does size matter?

 

[Shalrath]

As a, errr, male (*looks down*, yup, male), it definitely doesn't matter to me. I could do tall or short or similar. Cuteness, curves, and a high level of deviance are much more important.

I know it matters to a lot of chicks. Personally - although I can see biological reasons, male animals as big strong protectors - I don't really like this, I find it a bit offensive being so specific with height.


P.S. Like the polll. An important addition.

 

[harrlequin]

*raises hand*

Oh - tall men?

I have to admit to a fairly primitive sexual response to a man. I like them taller, larger, with lots of hair.

Actual penis size? There I have no preference. Each size has it's own delightful uses.

 

[00Syd]

I'm probably more likely to be attracted to a guy who is taller than me. I'm only 5'4 and if a guy is even just 5'5 I'm probably more likely to be attracted to him then someone shorter. But the specific height doen't matter much. If a guy is anywhere from 5'5 tp 6'10, it doesn't make much of a difference, I'm more likely to be attracted to him than someone who is my height or shorter.

It's the looking up at him that gets me, even if its only looking up a little.

(When seb is wearing his work boots it adds a few inches and it always makes me melt a little to have to look up at him that much. [not to mention his big heavy boots!])

 

[BiBunny]

Yes. I'm between 5'9" and 5'10", which is rather tall for a girl. It makes me feel awkward to be taller than the guy. I need a man to be at least 6', so I don't feel like Gigantor.

 

[Raisin7734]

I am short, but I am rather round. I don't like being with smaller guys because I'm afraid I'll hurt them. Also, it makes me feel all girlie when a big bear of a man has me in his arms.

I mentioned a bear, but that may be misleading. I am certainly not into hairy.

In the end, though, the man inside makes the biggest impression. Treat me like a lady, open my car door, and let me cum first. These are the real turn ons.

 

[be_ignited]

I prefer a man to be taller than me, but I'm rather short (5'1-5'2), so it's not hard to find someone who fits the bill.

Alternately, I prefer not to date someone too tall. When I was in high school, I dated someone who was 6'5. We went to prom together and I spent most of the night naval-gazing.

 

[lilly85]

I love tall guys. Size does matter to me. I can't date guys who are shorter than me or my height. I dated a shorter guy in high school...and it was just weird. Only lasted 2 weeks....of course that was because I found out he raped an 11 year old not because of his height...but still.

 

[MisterSir]

Alright, at least you're all honest.

Why?

 

[graceanne]

Eh. I definitely prefer a guy to be taller than me, but since I'm 5' tall. . .

Every guy I dated, other than K, was REALLY tall. (6'2" was the shortest guy, 6'4, the tallest.) K's only 5'8ish (depends on the ruler). (In other words still almost a foot taller than me.) So, while I like big guys, it's not a 'must have' for me to be attracted.

Why do I like big guys? They make me feel feminine. Don't know why, just that they do. Probably some primitive instinct. *shrugs*

 

[00Syd]

Alright, at least you're all honest.

Why?

And I quote:

It's the looking up at him that gets me, even if its only looking up a little.

Being forced to look up at someone is really... hot.

 

[Netzach]

I like big girls as a rule. There's nothing as hot to me as an amazonian or big ol' cushiony or both gal getting on her knees in front of me and being all shy and cute.

I mean I don't mind looking at ballerinas, I'd still do one, but I don't mind being smaller than a girl at all in either height or width.

The scariest male tops I've seen in action are frequently diminutive and gay, so that combination is more likely to call to me in a fascinated/slightly submissive/voyeuristic way.

I love a guy I can stand on, but I also like one I can dress in my own clothes. Really it doesn't matter much. They have their charms, all. I'm kind of the lyric rather than epic lover.

 

[rida]

Shallow as shallow it gets ... I like my men taller than me. And being 5' it is an easily achieved goal.

However, I'm so used to look up that anything less than 5'7" or 5'8" feels around the same height

Why I like them tall? probably a very basic genetic drive. As for a rational reason, I like to feel them wrapped around me, I like to feel as if they can carry me with one hand (or crash me with one ...).

That said ... there is something I like about being able to stand in front of a guy and look straight into his eyes instead of his Adam's apple

 

[sunandshadow]

I prefer guys who are not too tall because I find tall guys intimidating unless they are really thin, and I don't find dominance attractive so I don't like needing to look up or knowing that if we got in a fight I would lose. I'm 5'4" so there really aren't many guys shorter than me, but I wouldn't really care if a guy was a few inches shorter than me. I don't really notice a height difference between myself and another person unless it's more than 4 inches.

 

[Tawny_Temptress]

I have dated men of all heights, some shorter than me. It isnt an issue.

 

[Dosxx82256]

It's sad how many girls miss out on really great guys because they are not very tall.

BTW, it's not always genetic. I'm only 5'6'' but I hurt my knee in 6th grade playing volleyball and it stunted my growth. It doesn't mean I have bad genes. Problem is girls don't know that and immediately dismiss us shorter guys because height is right there on the cover of the book.

 

[Corylea]

Height matters not

I'm a woman who's 5' 10" tall, and my first serious boyfriend was 5' 2". He was a wonderful guy -- smart, funny, thoughtful, and treated me like I was precious. I thought those were the things that mattered, but everywhere we went, people felt compelled to point out that he was shorter than I was.

Oh, damn, is he really? How come I never noticed? *rolls eyes*

Complete strangers would stop us on the street to ask how we kissed, even though they didn't stop a 5' 10" MAN and a 5' 2" WOMAN to ask how THEY kissed. Well, it's the same way, don't you know -- the taller partner leans over, the shorter partner stretches up, and they meet slightly below the middle. Or the shorter one stands on a step. Or they kiss lying down. Really, it's not that difficult.

I think this is terribly relevant to the topic of this board, though, because all of the people who thought the man SHOULD be taller didn't seem to think that because the average man is taller than the average woman. No, they were assuming that a certain amount of male dominance was necessary and appropriate (though they didn't use that phraseology, of course). Women are socialized to expect and to eroticize male dominance -- perhaps not quite as extreme as the sorts of things we talk about here -- and it makes people visibly uncomfortable when the man is "too short" to be the dominant partner.

*snort* There are so many things wrong with that that it's hard to know where to begin.

The most dominant woman I've ever met was 4' 10". My 5' 2" boyfriend was a lot more dominant than my 6' 4" husband. Height might give one a bit of an advantage when dominating someone, but personality counts for a heck of a lot more.

And while I'm happy for people to play male dom/female sub games if that's what floats their boat, the idea that all heterosexual or bisexual people MUST fall into male dom/female sub pairs is ludicrous. But it's the underpinning of most of our heterosexual social and sexual customs, from the man being expected to make the first move all the way up to the missionary position.


Oh, and how did I end up with such a tall husband? I was flirting with a woman at a party, and he came over to talk to me. He told me later -- much later! -- that he came over to talk to me because I was so tall. His last girlfriend had been quite short, and interacting with her hurt his neck. So if you see a tall woman with a tall man, it isn't necessarily HER height preference that's at work.

 

[graceanne]

Oh, and how did I end up with such a tall husband? I was flirting with a woman at a party, and he came over to talk to me. He told me later -- much later! -- that he came over to talk to me because I was so tall. His last girlfriend had been quite short, and interacting with her hurt his neck. So if you see a tall woman with a tall man, it isn't necessarily HER height preference that's at work.

My cousin is 6' tall, her husband is . . . 6'4"? 6'6"? Somewhere around there. He introduced himself to her, because she's so tall. They were at a wedding for a mutual friend and she was the only girl that was tall enough for him to dance with without hurting his back. They've been married twelve years now.

Man, we're getting old.

 

[Shalrath]

Basic genetic drive...

You'd have thought we'd have grown out of that by now, especially on a forum where there's a lot of sexual and relational interaction described that has nothing to do with basic genetic drives. If we can progress from straight sex purely for procreating onto wax and spanking and genital piercing and dominating and whatever, surely we can progress from "men must be taller to be the protector etc etc" to something more....modern.


Edit: P.S. I am extremely disappointed about the lack of votes for the "I'm a spambot" option *shakes head*

 

[Adakgirl]

If we can progress from straight sex purely for procreating onto wax and spanking and genital piercing and dominating and whatever, surely we can progress from "men must be taller to be the protector etc etc" to something more....modern.

Perhaps you can show us exactly where the posters above regressed. or what in their posts made you think they have not progressed to "something more...modern". I do not see what has made you come to such a conclusion.

That said, I prefer men taller than myself also, I am 5'8" & 1/2 and I have dated men both shorter and taller. I like when I am standing and a man has the height to hover over my shoulder and see what I am doing, or to share in it. I like when a man has the height to get things down out of the cupboard for me that I can't reach. I like dancing with my cheek resting on a man's chest. I love long legs wrapping around me and tangling me up. I like to have to step lively to keep up with a tall man's stride. And yes, I like looking up into his face and I like him looking down into my face.

None of those preferences have to do with whether a tall man is Dominant or not. Nor did anyone say anything about short men not having the ability to be Dominant men. Not that I read anyway.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

I prefer a man to be taller than me, but I'm rather short (5'1-5'2), so it's not hard to find someone who fits the bill.

Alternately, I prefer not to date someone too tall. When I was in high school, I dated someone who was 6'5. We went to prom together and I spent most of the night naval-gazing.

What she said.

Master is 6ft and that's about as tall as I'll comfortably go. In mitigation, we met in a chatroom so it wasn't his height (or other measurements) that first impressed me. My ex is Portuguese and was only a few inches taller than me. I have never dated a guy shorter than me but to be honest, one hasn't really crossed my path as a romantic prospect. I'm not sure how I'd feel about submitting to a shorter guy but if the dominance was there, I'm sure my submission would follow. I wasn't sure about submitting to a younger guy until I met Master and he has proved himself more than mature and capable enough to deserve my respect, trust and ownership.

I think people are getting over the whole F taller than M thing. Sophie Dahl has been flying the flag in blighty for tall women dating shorter men. For those that don't know, Sophie is the 6ft tall model grand-daughter of legendary kids author Roald Dahl. Jamie Cullum, her partner, is a 5ft4 jazz/blues singer. They've recently got engaged. They're both in the public eye and clearly couldn't care less.

http://www.nowmagazine.co.uk/imageBank/cache/j/Jamie-Cullen.jpg_e_f3a7c2adba52315d6ab61b83a2cd478e.jpg

And don't get me started on the likes of Rod Stewart and Mick Jagger.

 

[Shalrath]

Perhaps you can show us exactly where the posters above regressed. or what in their posts made you think they have not progressed to "something more...modern". I do not see what has made you come to such a conclusion.

How very serious-sounding that is. BTW, I didn't use the word "regress".

It's not that complicated. Scroll up and look for any posters who prefer M to be taller than F and who make some reference to genetic disposition / animal instinct / whatever. That's what I'm talking about.

 

[00Syd]

A physical attraction to someone taller than oneself is, in my mind, no different than any other physical attraction. Whether its arbitrary, or predetermined by some biological factor, or any other number of determinants, physical attraction is something that you just can't help. Some people like big boobs, some people like long legs, some people like strong arms, some people like a lot of hair, and some people like tall guys. So what? I don't see that as somehow being less modern or "advanced", its just being true to what gets you hot, the way I'm true about all the other much stranger stuff that turns me on.

Taller guys get me hot, shorter guys get me less hot, big deal.

I should go yell at all the guys I've ever met who prefer shorter girls (not to mention girls with giant tits, or long legs, or a thin waist, or whatever) that they haven't advanced beyond their pure genetics (tsk tsk) and that they should be more "modern" in what physically attracts them?

No, that would be ridiculous. You like what you like, and you really can't change it.

 

[Shalrath]

I can see buttons being pushed with this one

Although, Syd, your original post was not one of the "genetic disposition" type ones.

I am assuming, from everything I have read anywhere and heard of from people in general, that there is a greater tendency towards tallM-shortF preference than there is for many other (all?) physical attraction preferences - including the ones you mentioned.

If that assumption is not correct then I'll happily be shown otherwise.

If that assumption is correct, AND a prominent reason for that is genetic / instinctive factors (again I'll happily be shown otherwise), then my point still applies: We as a species have changed many of the ways we interact from their genetic / instinctive / animal origins, particularly in the sexual / relational field *, so why does that one still remain??

I do believe the OP was starting a topic about this issue in general...


(* Edit: not always in good ways admittedly, and there is the whole female body issue here which you're hinting at Syd, hopefully that doesn't have to be part of this thread as it's a veritable vat of worms....although for the record I am 100% for natural body shapes and 100% very hostile to the media promoting unnatural body shapes)

 

[Subbymaybe]

I personally prefer a taller man. My current guy is around 6' and I'm 5'2". I not only prefer a taller guy, but a guy that is larger than I am. I am not extremely over weight but I could lose a pound or 25!! lol I do tend to not even look at a shorter man, and I guess you could call that shallow. I am just not physically attracted to them at first. But I have to say I am not attracted to a tall skinny man either. I do like a muscular and fit man, but then again as a man ages and sometimes tends to get that little stomach,well....I think that's sexy too!

I guess what it all boils down to is I like a man that is strong, dominate, and tall enough to be intimidating.