Does anyone have any tips for me about chewing my food?

[Malachi]

It keeps falling out of my mouth, or going up my nose. Help me. I'm desperate. Should I be taking it out every now and then to check my progress? My tongue keeps getting in the way, too.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

Here you go:

Open, close, open, close.

 

[Shaq]

It keeps falling out of my mouth, or going up my nose. Help me. I'm desperate. Should I be taking it out every now and then to check my progress? My tongue keeps getting in the way, too.

Concentrate...and tilt your head back a little til you get the hang of it...

 

[Cerberus666]

Just swallow.

 

[Minkey Boodle]

Get rid of the pesky tongue, for starters.

 

[Shaq]

It keeps falling out of my mouth, or going up my nose. Help me. I'm desperate. Should I be taking it out every now and then to check my progress? My tongue keeps getting in the way, too.

Why are you chewing anyway? Blend your meals and pump em intraveinously...

 

[Minkey Boodle]

Also, don't put food in your nose, it won't get chewed there.

 

[Rambling Rose]

I'll chew - you swallow. I saw this done in National Geographic so I know it works!

 

[Shaq]

I'll chew - you swallow. I saw this done in National Geographic so I know it works!

Birds do it right?

 

[Rambling Rose]

They don't do it wrong.

 

[Shaq]

They don't do it wrong.

Dodos are extinct for a reason.

 

[Rambling Rose]

Not that reason. Now scoot and let me help this poor man with his dinner!

 

[Malachi]

Wow, Thanks!

Hey, you guys. I've been trying out some of your suggestions and it's really helping.

I want to thank Minkey Boodle especially for her tip and lucid explanation about not putting the food up my nose: "It won't get chewed there." It's so logical when you put it that way.

Rambling Rose, thanks your offer of chewing assistance. That's so nice! Still, I'll take a rain check for now, as I think I'm getting the hang of it.

Now if I could only learn how to drink out of a cup without a nipple on it (and a WeebleWobble-esque device on it to keep it upright)...

 

[Minkey Boodle]

Not a problem. Anything for a kid in need.

Mastication is cool!

 

[Angel]

Mastication

I once said something to my younger brother about mastication, and he turned beet red, said he didn't do that and ran into his room and hid for an hour.

I'm such a retard, it took me a full 5 minutes to realize he'd thought I meant masturbation.

Now whenever we actually all sit down and have a meal together, I ask him if he needs any lube to chew with.

 

[sunstruck]

Now whenever we actually all sit down and have a meal together, I ask him if he needs any lube to chew with.

He he. I want to have dinner at Angel's house.

 

[Minkey Boodle]

hehehe...is he a masticator?

 

[Guest]

 

[Angel]

He he. I want to have dinner at Angel's house.

Are you sure? Hell, I don't even want to have dinner here. It always turns into a screaming match. We put the fun in Dysfunction.


Thank Gawd I'm moving.

 

[Minkey Boodle]

Are you sure? Hell, I don't even want to have dinner here. It always turns into a screaming match. We put the fun in Dysfunction.

Y'all should partake in more of that mutual mastication.

 

[Malachi]

I thought you all might want to know I've made a lot of progress in the last two years.