Do you relate a "high maintenance" person
- Thread starter Cath!
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seXieleXie
trouble
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high maintenance people need a lot of attention. it's not necesarily doing something or buying something, they're just extremely needy.
[edited for typos]
[edited for typos]
Shy Tall Guy
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I have spent a lot more money on my daughter than on my ex-wife, but my wife is a nuisance.
To me, it is not how much attention or money you spend on a person, but what kind of attention they require. I like giving a person a lot of attention, but if they are hard to get along with, and they are constantly a nuisance, then that is a high maintenance person.
To me, it is not how much attention or money you spend on a person, but what kind of attention they require. I like giving a person a lot of attention, but if they are hard to get along with, and they are constantly a nuisance, then that is a high maintenance person.
ksmybuttons
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For me a high maintenance person is someone who takes more energy than they give back.
Draco
2bOrNot2b
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I relate it to the things you have to do for them.
I once lived with a woman who was such a "clothes-horse".
The first thing she did each morning was her make-up and hair. I dont mean a quick brush to get rid of 'night-hair", I mean the full style and set. She would spend at least 45 minutes each morning before the mirror, just to come down for breakfast. She was attractive and didn't need make-up, but in the 18 months we lived together, the only time I saw her without it was in the shower/bath. I realise now that she had issues with her self-image. (She even "re-did" her face and hair before we made love)
I once lived with a woman who was such a "clothes-horse".
The first thing she did each morning was her make-up and hair. I dont mean a quick brush to get rid of 'night-hair", I mean the full style and set. She would spend at least 45 minutes each morning before the mirror, just to come down for breakfast. She was attractive and didn't need make-up, but in the 18 months we lived together, the only time I saw her without it was in the shower/bath. I realise now that she had issues with her self-image. (She even "re-did" her face and hair before we made love)
Lady Violet
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ksmybuttons said:
I totaly agree.
I live with one.
Its HELL
save me? PLEASE!!???
She never shuts up!! aaahhh shes talking right now!!! HHEEELLLPPP
I needed to vent. Thanks
*hugs everyone* im ok, really...
on_the_verge
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I need to pee, BBL!
on_the_verge
agent pro·vo·ca·teur
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High maintenance is relative if I must state. I go to a salon and spend over $40 bucks on a haircut, I get manicures every week, I buy expensive clothes to the point I purchase $145 pair of jeans and etc. Yet, can I change the oil of a car after that manicure? Yes! Do I want the best foods and finest things, maybe…I would rather run in the forest and be myself beyond it all, but I accept the small pleasures in life. Food, shelter, love and safety.
Somebody smack me! Ugh!
I just want what touches my heart and soul, no matter if it's miniscule or extravagant.
Somebody smack me! Ugh!
I just want what touches my heart and soul, no matter if it's miniscule or extravagant.
sandman9106
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all people are high maintenance in thier own way in my opion.
horny_giraffe
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I agree with ksmybuttons, more or less, in that the balance of giving vs. recieving needs to be reasonably even.ksmybuttons said:
For me, the biggest part of maintenance is attention. Some high-maintenance people seem to need to be the center of attention most of the time, and they want you (or their S/O) to be thinking of them all of the time. They want to spend more time with you than you are willing to spend with them, and ignoring them is a mortal sin. I guess that a relationship with a high-maintenance person (in this respect) could work just fine if you were obsessed with them.
The other big thing that makes a person high maintenance, for me, is unpredictability. People who don't do what they said they would do--for whatever reason. Some people always have an excuse. "Sorry I'm late. My car broke down." or "I had to get this bill mailed today so I had to miss our appointment." Excuses are for the weak. A strong person just apologizes and takes responsibility for their own actions.
tigerjen
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a little of both
I think that a high-maint. person is a bit of both.......
the individual spends money on themselves to make
theirselves look good (the "image" factor) with
the "right" makeup, designer clothes, designer shoes.....
in terms of "needing".......its "gotta have the BMW or
Mercedes"......"honey, I want you take me out to the
Rainbow Room (in NYC) for dinner and dancing"........
in my opinion, and I know quite a few around where
I live......they call a super high-maint. girl/woman a "JAP"
(Jewish American Princess)........and yes, that includes
being spoiled and not holding down a job and living
off a trust fund (for some gals).
tigerjen
Cath! said:
I think that a high-maint. person is a bit of both.......
the individual spends money on themselves to make
theirselves look good (the "image" factor) with
the "right" makeup, designer clothes, designer shoes.....
in terms of "needing".......its "gotta have the BMW or
Mercedes"......"honey, I want you take me out to the
Rainbow Room (in NYC) for dinner and dancing"........
in my opinion, and I know quite a few around where
I live......they call a super high-maint. girl/woman a "JAP"
(Jewish American Princess)........and yes, that includes
being spoiled and not holding down a job and living
off a trust fund (for some gals).
tigerjen
plasticman33
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High maintenance and selfish sometimes go hand in hand! My ex was like that, required only the best for herself and the hell with everyone else.
lovetoread
hello daddy
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High maintenance to me is not always a selfish thing. I have someone who is a bit demanding,but it fits with our relationship.
He cares for me very much and is very unselfish in dealing with me. If it takes doing things to make him happy then its not a bad thing.
He cares for me very much and is very unselfish in dealing with me. If it takes doing things to make him happy then its not a bad thing.
TigerClaw
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Well, I was going to quote....
the first post I agreed with. Then I was going to add a second, then a third and a forth. Hmmm, Didnt want to go through all the work. I agree witm most of the posts here. But I would modify one. The one by:
ksmybuttons: For me a high maintenance person is someone who takes more energy than they give back.
I should think that there would be something that is given back that would make the high maintenance worth it. I dont think I would survive a high maintenance woman. Unless, the benefits were well worth it. Luckily, I dont have to worry about that now. Presently, the relationship with my woman (LTR) is taking up a lot of my energy but it is not because of her. It is becuase of her environment. I dont consider her being High Maintenance because of it. She is regular or low maintenance. She often tries to do too much on her own where I feel I should be helping her.
In my relationship with her I feel I am the "high Maintenance" person. I tend to react to the environment she is in and she has to work around it. That should change once June rolls around.
the first post I agreed with. Then I was going to add a second, then a third and a forth. Hmmm, Didnt want to go through all the work. I agree witm most of the posts here. But I would modify one. The one by:
ksmybuttons: For me a high maintenance person is someone who takes more energy than they give back.
I should think that there would be something that is given back that would make the high maintenance worth it. I dont think I would survive a high maintenance woman. Unless, the benefits were well worth it. Luckily, I dont have to worry about that now. Presently, the relationship with my woman (LTR) is taking up a lot of my energy but it is not because of her. It is becuase of her environment. I dont consider her being High Maintenance because of it. She is regular or low maintenance. She often tries to do too much on her own where I feel I should be helping her.
In my relationship with her I feel I am the "high Maintenance" person. I tend to react to the environment she is in and she has to work around it. That should change once June rolls around.
Lady Violet
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Hi, me again.
Im venting.
Now that I think of it, i dont think my problem is high maintenance. I think she was just dropped on the head to many times as a child.
hehe.. sorry, that was mean.
Im venting.
Now that I think of it, i dont think my problem is high maintenance. I think she was just dropped on the head to many times as a child.
hehe.. sorry, that was mean.
lovetoread
hello daddy
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Lady Violet said:
Ohhh so that is what must have happened to him...it all makes sense now!
ksmybuttons
Push and Pull
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Re: Well, I was going to quote....
I will stand by my post even in light of what you are saying.
I have people in my life that take my energy. I walk away from them feeling depleted. I spend no money on them and maybe not even a great deal of time. I have to spend time replenishing myself from what they have taken. I consider that high maintenance.
I have other people in my life, although they may require large portions of my time and my attention, that I walk away from innervated, ready to take on more and emotionally fulfilled. They make me better. I don't consider that high maintenance.
I can spend money and attention on my 6 year old son and I never consider him high maintenance. He returns to me much, much more than I can ever give back. I get a great deal of pleasure in all that I give to him.
It seems that you and luvtoread give each other energy. It pops out of the screen when you meet in a thread. What can be high maintenance about that? It seems to be given freely and returned freely and it certainly makes you both feel better. It always makes me feel good when I see it...
My fish tank is high maintenance. I don't get much return from it...
Tiger_n_NJ said:
I will stand by my post even in light of what you are saying.
I have people in my life that take my energy. I walk away from them feeling depleted. I spend no money on them and maybe not even a great deal of time. I have to spend time replenishing myself from what they have taken. I consider that high maintenance.
I have other people in my life, although they may require large portions of my time and my attention, that I walk away from innervated, ready to take on more and emotionally fulfilled. They make me better. I don't consider that high maintenance.
I can spend money and attention on my 6 year old son and I never consider him high maintenance. He returns to me much, much more than I can ever give back. I get a great deal of pleasure in all that I give to him.
It seems that you and luvtoread give each other energy. It pops out of the screen when you meet in a thread. What can be high maintenance about that? It seems to be given freely and returned freely and it certainly makes you both feel better. It always makes me feel good when I see it...
My fish tank is high maintenance. I don't get much return from it...
Lady Violet
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lovetoread said:
Ohhh so that is what must have happened to him...it all makes sense now!
hee hee
Im venting again
She never shuts up, i mentioned that. Even if Ive heard the story shes told me before, not to mention that I tell her Ive heard it before, she tells me again.. whats strange is that even though the story has the same basis, its never actually quite the same story twice.
AAAHHHH
thank u
TigerClaw
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Re: Re: Well, I was going to quote....
Thank You,
I dont think High Maintenance is always bad. I should hope not. I do believe as far as LTR I am High Maintenance. I make up for it by my generosity and caring. She has mentioned other things too. I can only hope I continue to satisfy her needs or become less demanding. She her self is not high maintenance at all. But the environment she is in is very high maintenance.
Once we are together I expect things to calm down abit. She will no longer have the demands placed on her and I will be in a better position to help her with taking care of the kids and daily life. I will be calmer knowing she is in a better environment, therefore I will less maintenance.
The energy and delight you see are some of the benefits we offer each other. They out weigh any high maintenance issue to date.
ksmybuttons said:
Thank You,
I dont think High Maintenance is always bad. I should hope not. I do believe as far as LTR I am High Maintenance. I make up for it by my generosity and caring. She has mentioned other things too. I can only hope I continue to satisfy her needs or become less demanding. She her self is not high maintenance at all. But the environment she is in is very high maintenance.
Once we are together I expect things to calm down abit. She will no longer have the demands placed on her and I will be in a better position to help her with taking care of the kids and daily life. I will be calmer knowing she is in a better environment, therefore I will less maintenance.
The energy and delight you see are some of the benefits we offer each other. They out weigh any high maintenance issue to date.
