Do you really want to know?

[SlidingInSilk]

As I sat here writing this afternoon I remembered something that happened to me recently and wanted to ask the men out there, and the ladies too since this can go both ways. When you ask a woman how many lovers she has had do you really want the true total or are you happier thinking that she has only had a couple of lovers?

I ask because I tend to get a straight faced reaction with either answer I give.

 

[Sixth]

I'd want the truth - for the truth. It's not a question and answer situation that I can see myself fussing about; there's no 'wrong' answer. That said, I can imagine that some people might care.

 

[michaelmt1]

Who would relly ask that question in any case. I dont care and I dint want to know its as simple as that.

 

[juicygirl]

Not really a question you should ask unless you can handle it. Still, I am really not sure why you would anyway. The girl's with you so why would you care?

 

[SlidingInSilk]

Not really a question you should ask unless you can handle it. Still, I am really not sure why you would anyway. The girl's with you so why would you care?

Well, in the case I was speaking of, the guy wanted to know for STD reasons, and I know it would have made more sense for him to ask if I was clean but he wasn't the first one to ask. I don't like to lie even like something silly as a number. His reaction or lack there of brought the question to mind.
Silk

 

[juicygirl]

That is a good reason to ask, and if he didn't like it screw him. I thought it was a different sort of worry. Always reasonable to insist on condoms and wait before any bareback riding. Sorry I didn't think of that. I thought the question was aimed at something else. For STD's an important must, these are still the plague years.

 

[Sixth]

That is a good reason to ask, and if he didn't like it screw him. I thought it was a different sort of worry.

Actually. No. If he didn't like the idea and ran off on you then screwing him would be the very thing you're not doing.

 

[SlidingInSilk]

Actually. No. If he didn't like the idea and ran off on you then screwing him would be the very thing you're not doing.

LOL very funny and too true!

 

[juicygirl]

LOL, fair point Sixth.

 

[Khadgar]

hmmm.... how many partners is it before you have the risk of STD's?

oh, and i'd want the real answer. if it were a serious relationship, then i'd be hoping it wasn't anything crazy, or it might make me think, but if it was a serious relatioship then whi cares?

 

[juicygirl]

Oh come on, you have to know that it is exactly once. Unless you guys know that you're both virgins its once. If its a serious relationship, and the interest is health, I can't see any reason not to ask -- if its out of some weird fantasy that the other person is learning more from you than they could have possibly known before, then its a question you really shouldn't ask unless you know you'll be comfortable with the answer.

 

[Khadgar]

lol i know i know once, but i was wondering if it bacame a serious risk at some number.


other than that, yep i agree

 

[juicygirl]

It really just depends on how many lovers the other person has had. Now if that's the concern, of course you should ask.

 

[SlidingInSilk]

lol i know i know once, but i was wondering if it bacame a serious risk at some number.


other than that, yep i agree

The thing is I suppose one could lie and say three partners and I'm clean versus say oh 30 partners and I'm clean. I'm curious as too how many people are more comfortable thinking that their partner hasn't been around the block (whether they have or not).

 

[juicygirl]

Love the avatar sliding, though I like you too. I think most people would prefer to think their lovers are learning all this great new stuff from them. So most people probably want to think that their lovers haven't been around the block. Me, I'd prefer to lay down with an acknowledged slut and wake up satisfied.

Kisses

 

[SukMyBg1]

How Many?

Me, I'd prefer to lay down with an acknowledged slut and wake up satisfied.

Kisses

I agree totally, I would rather be satisfied than not. I would naturally assume that I'm not the first, so I would just grab a condom and and use it until a time when we both can feel comfortable with each other sexually.

 

[SlidingInSilk]

Love the avatar sliding, though I like you too.
Kisses

AWWWW....thanks JG. As to the Av I drew her I thought she has this I'm a tease quality to her.

 

[juicygirl]

Very pretty drawing Sliding . . . and you are always welcome.

 

[LauraSG]

That is a wonderful drawing. I have zero artistic talent, except when it comes to writing screenplays and such. But obviously I can't post one of those as my avatar

 

[juicygirl]

You could try to post the title page. The Laura of the Rings. Laura the Barbarian. You can count on Laura. The Third Laura. Being Laura SG. I wouldn't count the idea out. You could probably proposition someone to do one for you. I still kind of like the screenplay idea, but I am a very silly person.

There's always literary Laura. The Catcher in the Laura. Tender is the Laura. Leaves of Laura.




lol. I've been too silly.

 

[hilltopper]

doesn't

to me that doesn't matter to me that was in the past and doesn't bother me ,as long as my lover is with me nowand giving me loving

 

[MizRaven]

I am the kind of person who tells the truth. Even if it hurts. I figure if you didn't want to know the real answer to the question, you never should have asked it in the first place.
When it comes to your partners partners, I gotta know. You know how they say you sleep with every person that person slept with. I would like to know it I am sleeping with 2, 20 or 80...
Honesty in this case, is definitely the best policy.

 

[Sixth]

You know how they say you sleep with every person that person slept with. I would like to know it I am sleeping with 2, 20 or 80...

I hate that expression. You're not sleeping with my ex, you're sleeping with me. I don't think it's right (fair nor wise) to measure someone's effect on you based on the number of people they've slept it - although it is possible to get a greater understanding of that person through the number of people they've slept with.

I think the expression relates only to not-safe sex. It's a poor way to try and have Joe Public come to grips with the idea that you can catch something your partner caught off someone else.

 

[stupidbastid]

NUMBER?

I think it is an insensitive bastid to even ask such a question. The main and ONLY point is the Lover you are with right then and there. The past can't be changed and doesn't matter except for the experience you bring to the present. The future can't be predicted but can surely be enhanced by the experience you are getting right now.

The correct answer is...... NONE OF YOUR DAMNED BUSINESS!!!

 

[Kelson]

Well, to a degree it is their business. If you've slept with 500 partners...the chances are very slim that I would sleep with you because, personally, I don't like the idea of taking medication for the rest of my life because of that STD you gave me. That said...it still is a crappy question. You can sleep with no one and have STDs or sleep with 1 million and have none.

There are other reasons, of course. I am a naturally curious person about almost everything, thus my calling to research. When I get to know people, I want to know like everything about them. Of course, I'm not judgemental like some who ask the question or using it for any purpose other then understanding my partner, but some would think it a bad reason.

If someone were to ask me right now how many people I've slept with I'd answer truthfully. I have nothing to hide. I'd rather they know, in fact. At this stage in my life, I have a slight chance of being the first (though with younger and younger sex amoung teens this isn't a developing trend) and very slim chance of being the last lover of any person. They don't want to catch anything from me and, I'd hope, they wouldn't want to give me anything.

The problem stems from people who think that they have to measure up to everyone else you've fucked. In that case, their egotistical and probably deserve a bit of ego-bashing. Honesty is the best policy. Or, just don't answer. If you aren't comfortable giving the answer, don't give one. Especially since you may now know what your partner wants to hear (they will always say they want the truth, well...almost always).