Do you ever

[Rubyfruit]

... refrain from talking about something because you don't want it to be real?

 

[lobito]

depends on what it is

 

[wicked faerie]

a resounding yes

 

[koalabear]

No.

 

[sexy-girl]

yes its very natural ... hope everything is ok ruby

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

A simple yes.

Probably more than I should.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Thanks sexy-girl. *smooch*

I've noticed that I do this a lot.

I have quite a collection of white elephants in my living room right now.

 

[alexandraaah]

Rubes, I have a little part of my brain where I send these things because for whatever reason they're too painful to bring to the front, let alone talk about.

They usually surface, though, and they don't end up being nearly as harrowing as they once seemed.

 

[wicked faerie]

Thanks sexy-girl. *smooch*

I've noticed that I do this a lot.

I have quite a collection of white elephants in my living room right now.

don't get trampled.

 

[patient1]

I think it's quite human.

We aren't ususally ready to deal with things when they happen.


Sometimes we need to collect ourselves before we can even acknowledge them, be cause admitting a problem, or a loss, means we need to deal with it.

 

[Hamletmaschine]

I think I understand what you mean, Ruby, and SG is right. There is a relationship between experience and expression, such that things we do not or cannot talk about will have an air of unreality and senselessness about them. Sure, the stuff happens, regardless of whether we talk about it or not, but it doesn't become real to us--for us--until we talk about it, express it in some way. Avoiding talking about something keeps it unreal, and so long as it's unreal, we don't have to deal with it or face it.

Hell, this is the whole basis for Freud's "talking cure."

I'm sorry to hear you're having a tough time, sweetie.

 

[Cheyenne]

The most important thing about those white elephants is to talk about them with the other people who are sitting in the same living room.

Good luck, Ruby.

 

[pipercatt]

I generally talk about things to make them more real.

If I don't want to deal with it, I usually shove it out of my brain and try not to even think about it.

Ruby, I hope whatever it is, all is well soon.

 

[Kitte]

a resounding yes

DITTO!

 

[Calamity Jane]

All the time darlin. I finally had to build a pen just to house the elephants. Funny thing is, they eat a lot and tend to take up space other things could be using.

If you need to talk, let me know.

 

[Lasz]

No because I am going to have to deal with it eventually.
If I talk about it ASAP I get it out of the way and over with!

 

[SXCRgirl]

Sometimes I do this. But eventually, it will come out. I find myself going crazy and driving others crazy, so I have to talk about it.

I'm sorry you're having a rough time Ruby. Hope things get better soon.

 

[estevie]

... refrain from talking about something because you don't want it to be real?

Yes, but eventually you have to. It won't go away...no matter how long you ignore it.

I'm sorry you are hurting, Ruby.

 

[Never]

Um. I hardly talk about anything so wanted or not, it doesn't get talked about.

 

[intrigued]

Hi Ruby!

I agree with patient 1 and Hamletmaschine...they said it perfectly.

I have found that if I cannot talk about it, which seldom happens, then it is because I am still processing it...theres no point in even trying to until I can.
The worst thing I do is not dealing with things that others "force" onto me....I just drift away because I don't appreciate being put in the position of having to deal with it. Its not a good thing to do, it only makes it worse.

Give yourself a break, and a little time. And then, you can always just scream.......hope it gets better for you.

 

[SilverVeil]

I don't talk about things much. I let them sit inside me and fester and poison my heart, then something happens that makes it all come out in a HUGE explosion of anger and hurt.

Sucks when that happens.

 

[freakygirl]

I allow things to fester until I blow. Then rather than talk about something.. I yell.. and clean the house. (best time to clean is when I'm mad )

 

[markb325]

I don't talk about things much. I let them sit inside me and fester and poison my heart, then something happens that makes it all come out in a HUGE explosion of anger and hurt.

Sucks when that happens.

I use to be that way just keep stuff inside then explode. 3 years later I don't have to go to see a doctor and my blood preasure stay where it should be for the most part.

Of course I have a very special lady that drags stuff out of me before it gets that far now.