Deleted for the sake of my own mental health
- Thread starter BushR
- Start date
Michaelcat17
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2017
- Posts
- 1,039
Good luck well written
sallysparrow23
Dirty birdy
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2023
- Posts
- 6,530
Kiddy pool filled with Dawn dish soap and water should do the trick. Maybe offer snacks to get them in. Otherwise, good luck with your search!
Michaelcat17
Literotica Guru
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- Feb 5, 2017
- Posts
- 1,039
Lol
Daisy_Love
Classy Smut
- Joined
- Aug 24, 2019
- Posts
- 19,585
Kudos!! That title is hilarious.
Cheshire_cat71
Epitome of unique
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2024
- Posts
- 141
Being a sarcastic smart ass is the only way to beOK - admit it - that got your attention, didn't it?
I'm sorry to disappoint you if you really do have a naked dwarf fetish. I'm probably not your guy. In fact, I'm pretty tall.
And in case you haven't figured this out yet, yeah - I'm a smart-ass.
I'm in my forties, self-employed - and let's be honest, I'm bored. Bored and pondering misbehaviour, but let's be honest again - if we weren't misbehaving, we wouldn't be on Literotica, would we?
If you want someone to trade flirty notes with, I'm your guy. If you want to delve into deeper fantasies, desires and hidden dreams, I'm your guy. If you want to be driven to the edge of orgasmic bliss time and time again, I'm your guy.
If you want someone to pull your hair, call you a bitch and demand that you make me a sandwich while I watch the monster-truck rally on TV... I'm so totally not your guy.
I'm literate, I know the difference between to, two, and too, and I believe women are to be admired, not used.
Physically, I'm tall with blond hair and blue eyes. While that may sound attractive at first glance, I'm rockin' the Dad bod. (Just being honest.)
Are you out there? Even if you think you MAY be out there, hit me up. I don't bite unless requested.
positiveflirt
Taken, not stirred
- Joined
- Sep 14, 2022
- Posts
- 3,604
10/10, would read again.
Good luck!
(you should listen to @sallysparrow23, she helped me get my oily dwarf safely down from the roof)
Good luck!
(you should listen to @sallysparrow23, she helped me get my oily dwarf safely down from the roof)
MindYaBitness
🤓Dork w/Nice Boobs
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2014
- Posts
- 11,653
This is the only personal ad I've ever read that I made it to the end without a thermonuclear eye roll. Good luck to you, sir!
Hey - now I feel bad. I don't like the idea of stopping a woman from a good eye roll.
Eyes rolling back in her head, toes curling, a good gasp... all of the things.
10/10, would flirt again. (Bows in appreciation.)
I usually just poke the dwarfs with a stick and let them jump on to a trampoline. It worked well until one day I poked two off at the same time... the resulting rebound meant Blinky cleared my backyard fence and I had to fish him out of the neighbours koi pond. That was embarassing.
Come on Sally... how many situations in life can be cleared up by a kiddy pool full of dish soap!?
Oily dwarfs? Soapy pool.
Tax dispute at City Hall? Soapy pool.
I'm sensing a trend.
Yesok1
My ?? is taken!
- Joined
- May 18, 2021
- Posts
- 5,963
Lol, saw the title and thought this is perfect for @Oldermom935 based on her fetishism for dwarves she accidentally admitted to.
sallysparrow23
Dirty birdy
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2023
- Posts
- 6,530
I think you need to invest in small pools and soap. This could be your niche.
Rule 34: If it exists, there's porn of it.
As much as I'd like to test that theory, there are some terms I'm afraid to search for...
TryinToFigureItOut84
Virgin
- Joined
- Jan 21, 2024
- Posts
- 67
That, sir, was a genius introduction!
But….. do you know the difference between there, they’re, and their?
But….. do you know the difference between there, they’re, and their?
KimAwakened
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jan 14, 2024
- Posts
- 164
Tut, tut.
Surely you knew that the plural of dwarf is now dwarfs... in Dumbeddownworld..? All the wifes around will tell you so as they cut leafs from the trees with their nice, sharp knifes.
The problem is they probably don't tell their other halfs...
