Discworld

[Kepic]

Now, those of you who might know of what I titled this thread, are probably thinking this won't work.

But I'm willing to give it a go anyhow.

For those of you who don't, I can only recommend you look up Terry Pratchett's books. If you like fantasy stories, like the Hobbit, for instance... then imagine such injected with a heavy dose of humour, and you're close to thinking what his stories are like.

I'll start with some quote(s) from the start of one of his books, to set the general scene (and possibly even help his sales, lol)...


Nothing but stars, scattered across the blackness as though the Creator had smashed the windscreen of his car and hadn't bothered to stop to sweep up the pieces.

This is the gulf between universes, the chill deeps of space that contain nothing but the occasional random molecule, a few lost comets and . . .

. . . but a circle of blackness shifts slightly, the eye reconsiders perspective, and what was apparently the awesome distance of interstellar wossname becomes a world under darkness, its stars the lights of what will charitably be called civilisation.

For, as the world tumbles lazily, it is revealed as the Discworld - flat, circular, and carried through space on the back of four elephants who stand on the back of Great A'tuin, the only turtle to ever feature on the Hertzsprung-Russell Disgram, a turtle ten thousand miles long, dusted with the frost of dead comets, meteor-pocked, albedo-eyed. No-one knows the reason for all this, but it is probably quantum.

Much that is weird could happen on a world on the back of a turtle like that.

It's happening already.

Another Disc day dawned, but very gradually, and this is why. When light encounters a strong magical field it loses all sense of urgency. It slows right down. And on the Discworld the magic was embaressingly strong, which meant that the soft yellow light of dawn flowed over the sleeping landscape like the caress of a gentle lover, or, as some would have it, like golden syrup.

 

[Lightman]

woohoo!

Great idea Kepic! I simply LOVE Terry Pratchett's books.

And yes, I can see how one could put some sex into it...have you got any idea where the whole thing will start? Ankh-Morpork?

 

[Kepic]

Ankh-Morpork would probably be the best place to start this, though Lancre has a certain appeal too. OK, I'll settle for the Great Wahoonie:

Ankh-Morpork is the oldest existing city on the Discworld (and known to 'affectionately' by its citizens/denizens as the Great Wahoonie, in a similar fashion that NY might be referred to as the Big Apple - a Wahoonie is a vegetable that grows typically to 20ft in length, is covered in spikes the colour of earwax, and smells like an anteater thats eaten a very bad ant. Its flavour is prized by connoisseurs and makes everyone else want to be sick).
Bisected by the river Ankh (which is so thick with sludge from the city even an agnostic could walk across it), the city is really two cities - proud Ankh, Turnwise of the river (Turnwise being the direction the discworld spins, which helps divide the weight more evenly on the four elephants), and the pestilent Morpork on the Widdershins side, although the pestilence is quite democratic and covers most of the city.
The current form of government is a highly specialised democracy; as they say in Ankh-Morpork, it's a case of One Man, One Vote - - Lord Vetinari is the Man, he has the Vote. In essence the city is governed as a result of the interplay of various pressure groups. Lord Vetinari positively encouraged the growth of the Guilds, of which there are now some 300 in the city. In practice, the city's political structure consists entirely of a huge number of pressure groups plotting, fighting, connivivng, froming alliances, shouting, scheming, intriguing and making plans, in the middle of which one man is quietly doing things his way.

Hmm... I could copy out several pages of this stuff and still only scratch the surface of the backround! There's a veritable arsenal of characters to play. I'm currently considering Captain Carrot for myself (a member of the City Watch, a dwarf - well, at least by adoption!), or maybe CMOT Dibbler ('Cut My Own Throat' Dibbler, a purveyor of absolutely anything that can be sold hurriedly from an open suitcase in a busy street).

Anyone who is interested, let me know, and what kind of character you're looking for or interested in, and I can assign a character to you and/or send some relevant details on background or post them here for you. We've got wizards (though probably students from Unseen University student's would be more suitable to play), trolls, dwarves, zombies, vampires, witches, werewolves, and a host of others. You can e-mail me through my literotica profile.