Dirty Language in dirty stories

[BigTexan]

In a couple of the feedbacks I have received on my story, the comment has come up about my language.

I use the word "Fuck" in narrative and in dialog in my story. Apparently to excess. One person even went so far as to say, "Think about the children reading your stories, do you want them reading language like that?"

Of course my first response was: Children shouldn't be reading my stories. And if this had been the only person mentioning it I would have blown it off. However others mention it too.

How do the rest of you feel about "dirty" language in the erotic stories we post on Lit? When is it too much? How do you know when to draw the line?

If this has been discussed before then I missed it and I'm sorry.

BigTexan

 

[ronde]

The language used by a character should fit the character, be it dialogue or 1st person narrative. The author needs to be careful here; it is disconcerting to read "fuck me in the ass, hard" from the Sunday school teacher who a paragraph ago was an angel incarnate. There should be some indication in the character development that she might not be all that innocent.

In 3d person narrative, the choice becomes more difficult. I believe the generally held opinion is that the narrative should fit the "tone" of the story. I don't usually use vernacular in this POV because I tend to write romantic themes, and it doesn't seem to fit well.

 

[Pookie]

Its like anything else I guess. "Too much of a good thing ...". I'm not sure if you used too much without re-reading your stories. But sometimes a little at just the right time can be very powerful. If it is overused, you also de-sensitize your readers to it.

The "fuck me in the ass, hard" from the Sunday school teacher becomes very powerful to the reader if their has been little use of that language up to that point as well. But it definately needs to fit the character, as developed up to that point, unless it is an intended "surprise plot twist" to the reader and handled very carefully so the reader is not insulted.

Some stories I have read have been very arousing without the use of "dirty" language. I tend to use it frequently during sex scenes and sparingly throughout the rest of the dialogue. It depends somewhat on the characters and the situations they are in.

 

[Erlikkhan]

"Fuck me in the ass" by the Sunday School teacher is exactly what most readers of erotic stories are seeking, but I agree with Pookie, it can be overdone. I wrote a story called "The Letter" where a college freshman girl writes her boyfriend a Dear John and slowly reveals how she got caught up in a night of sex. The first half of the letter she is prim and proper, but as she gets deeper and deeper into "trouble" she starts using dirty words and admits to him it turns her on to do so. In "A Piece of Heaven" I keep all the dialogue clean until the woman asks him to "fuck me hard." Then I switch to a different dialogue. In "Two Very Nasty Girls" the dialogue starts out nasty and goes downhill from there.

I think it is much more situation and environmental... depends on the affect you are trying to achieve.

 

[Quasimodem]

I'd say using 'dirty language' is something like using caps.

USE IT ALL THE TIME AND IT BECOMES BACKGROUND NOISE.

Use it occasionally to make a POINT and it becomes useful.


Pretty much like rond, Pookie_grrl, and Erlikkhan have said before.

 

[deliciously_naughty]

I think that it's porn, and so the word "fuck" is almost avoidable...but as they've said...it's certainly possible to overuse.

Edited to add...I did read your story. I would say that perhaps there is an overuse of the word fuck...there are plenty of other adjectives you could use in plenty of place. Hump, screw, ride, etc...you really only use fuck consistently...just a critique.

However, I did really like your story and I thought the plot was creative and sexy.

 

[Madame Manga]

One person even went so far as to say, "Think about the children reading your stories, do you want them reading language like that?"

Of course my first response was: Children shouldn't be reading my stories.

No...fucking...duh. ;-)

Damn, I haven't laughed so hard all day! What, did this genius think it was OK for a child to read a story about lesbian incest and a threesome (not that there's anything WRONG with that) if it just didn't use too many dirty words?

MM *gasping for breath*

http://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=146334

 

[BigTexan]

Thanks ya'll.

I'll certainly keep all of this in mind on my next story. (Brows nitted... "He copulated in a forceful manner with her, no ... he participated in frantic sexual intercourse with her, no ... he ...)

BigTexan

 

[Pookie]

BigTexan

Just remember to keep the bedcovers over them in case the children are reading.

 

[Quasimodem]

Just keep picking those jewels from your brain,
those pearls from your mouth,
and them nits from your brow.

And don't forget to use 128 bit encryption
to keep those precocious little buggers
from learning more about sex
than their uptight parents.

 

[BigTexan]

I just went through my latest story. Sort of a new form of procrastination

It is 3866 words long at the moment and only 289 of them are the word "Fuck".

I don't think that is too many, do you?

Just kidding. Okay, I've got some editing to do.

BigTexan

 

[Quasimodem]

Did you count the 'fucking' title?

 

[BigTexan]

Nope, so the ratio is 289 "Fuck"s in 3871 words. Even Better

BigTexan

 

[wildsweetone]

(thanks for the giggles )


a couple of ideas perhaps:

a) grab a thesaurus or try whispersecret's thread (though 'fuck' specifically isn't there, other synonyms may trigger different words/thoughts for you) on Erotic Synonyms: http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=39742
i recall a thread somewhere in the Hangout a while back, but i've been unable to find it through the search function...

b) use the 'find and replace' feature - i used mine the other day on a whole story to get rid of '...ly' words (i forget their name, are they adverbs?) saved me a ton of time.

have fun

 

[jon.hayworth]

I certainly do not write stories for children to read.

The thought of a kid reading some of my stories fills me with horror.

I think that it is the tone of the story that dictates the language.

If you are using first person narration, or third person narrative that is biased to looking into one character's head more than the others - then the language must be dictated by that character's language.

If you are using the omniescent third party narrator, then it may be you want to opt for using other terms than the raw anglo-saxon terminology.

Finally I would say that it is important to be consistant. Don't change halfway through from coy latin terminology to explicit Anglo-Saxon colloquialisms.


Watch out for a my latest historic - it should be up in the next couple of days and will HORRIFY some people its called "A ROYAL SCREW"

jon

 

[JAYCE73]

Who the fuck? What the fuck?

The f-word is in my book a super word. Many people use it in many different ways. But if you use it constantly, people will tend to think, that you have no fucking other word in your fucking vocabulary.
It also makes a lot of people squirm when used too much.
I use it in my stories, but only when the caracters are upset, or in the heat of passion. And even then, I try to curve it's use.
So, when writing, try to use other, more socialy accepted words. It will make your story more articulate, and more pleasurable to read. Get my fucking drift?

 

[TheEarl]

There are some supreme erotic thesauruses out there and I am considering taking a story, replacing some of the words with the most ridiculous terms I can find, then submitting it to humour. Anyone got a story they'd like to offer up for ritual disembowelment?

The Earl

 

[SlickTony]

As you might remember, I did write a story that had hardly any dirty words at all in it, and it can be done, but damn! it got to be hard work.

By the way, those of y'all that have a link to your stories in your signature line, how do you do it?

 

[NaughtyMike]

Fuck those stupid prick assholes, Tex.

If you are like me, your main character swears. This makes my yankee character real.

 

[PoppingTom]

I begin to understand, that from the American view, the word "fuck" is something to avoid. From another - in my case, german - view, the American tries (and fails) of not using the f-word is kinda funny to look at. The "Explicit Lyrics" sticker became something of a quality symbol. Sometimes you ask yourself, if America got no other problems than the f-word, which increases the meaning of it.

 

[jomar]

2002?

What the fuck?

 

[Dragonlipz]

No telling what is on the mind of the reviewer....

 

[Guest]

2002?

What the fuck?

I know. I blinked when I saw a Quasi post.

This is that same person with a dozen alts all posting ridiculous shit.

Guess they figured so many people had them on ignore they had to bump old threads to be heard?

I suspect they are underage, posting when the parents are out of the house.

 

[sr71plt]

Some nice avatars, though.

 

[jomar]

I know. I blinked when I saw a Quasi post.

This is that same person with a dozen alts all posting ridiculous shit.

Guess they figured so many people had them on ignore they had to bump old threads to be heard?

I suspect they are underage, posting when the parents are out of the house.

So, did you like my use of the word fuck? I thought it quite appropriate and humorous on a couple of levels. But then again, it's late and I had just got back from the Superbowl party.

And I agree.