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CarolineOh

Newbie Phase Two
Joined
Feb 12, 2002
Posts
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Zipman posted on another thread that he likes to plan all the details of a scene in advance. That had me wondering , how common is this? I'd like to know if the dominants prefer to pre-plan as much as possible, or mostly "wing it", and I'd be curious to know what you feel the advantages and disadvantages of each approach are.
 
good question

Hi Caroline
funnily enough, I was talking to K about this recently. Now , whilst I do think that to write too rigid a script would be detrimental, I also plan a lot of things in advance.

So, whilst, to me, there has to be space for doing whatever seems right at the time. I will be working to a preplanned framework. The positions I want her in...how to smoothly segue from one to another.....ensuring all props are to hand so as to avoid an unwanted pause and that kinda wilting feeling as you panic and search for the item you wanted. If an outdoors scene VERY careful checking and finding the right location.

If it will be a very intense scene, I will have planned rest periods..as well as reading the situation minute by minute.

So thats my 'take'. Too involved a script is (for me) rigid and somehow lacks pace and excitement. Too little planning can lead to awkward moments.

I hope I work within a framework and get it just right .

That help for starters?

Dave
 
Re: good question

sir-to-k said:
Hi Caroline
funnily enough, I was talking to K about this recently. Now , whilst I do think that to write too rigid a script would be detrimental, I also plan a lot of things in advance.

So, whilst, to me, there has to be space for doing whatever seems right at the time. I will be working to a preplanned framework. The positions I want her in...how to smoothly segue from one to another.....ensuring all props are to hand so as to avoid an unwanted pause and that kinda wilting feeling as you panic and search for the item you wanted. If an outdoors scene VERY careful checking and finding the right location.

If it will be a very intense scene, I will have planned rest periods..as well as reading the situation minute by minute.

So thats my 'take'. Too involved a script is (for me) rigid and somehow lacks pace and excitement. Too little planning can lead to awkward moments.

I hope I work within a framework and get it just right .

That help for starters?

Dave

I was surprised that my post generated a thread (this is a first for me - thanks Coh), but here goes a fuller explanation.

I agree completely with sir-to-k that there has to be a mix between planning and going with the flow. I also plan out a framework for the exact reason that sir-to-k does, to be able to transition smoothly from position to position. Do I want to spank her ass first, or tie her up spread-eagle to spank her nipples and clit? Do I want to use a crop or a whip? How hard do I want to spank her nipples, because I can't spank them too much and then use clamps on them. etc. etc.

However, no matter how much planning I do, and no matter how good I think the plan is, the most important thing is to constantly assess what is going on, how she is feeling, what is the mood in the room, does she need a rest, is this the night we push a limit etc. etc. and adjust what I am doing to make the experience as enjoyable as possible for both of us.
 
Those guys had good answers and mine is much the same. You want to have a plan but you cant go too much by a script. When I was pro, I would have to do step by step with clients and that was a drag.
heres the thing. Following a script is no fun, but just winging it, you can look like to aint sure and then the sub might lose some confidence in your domming.
So I plan but not too detailed.
 
my first time with Master

not sure that this is really classified as a "scene" however.. Master seemed to have thought alot and planned what He was gonna do with me and also seemed tho to take into account my "nervousness" and excitememt" to the point that I truly loved the "spontaniety " of it all.
I had no such thoughts of Him EVER bein "out of control" as indeed He had all His proper toys,tools,etc EXACTLY where He wanted them including His favorite "accessory=me!!
I feel that a bit of spontanaety really helps keeps the subs level of excitement and peaking "curiousity as to "what's He gonna do next? ,up..:D :devil:
 
Dream has a good point.

The first time with a new Dominant, it is reassuring to me if I get the sense that he has planned fairly carefully, but not overly so.

I need to sense his control as I walk into an unknown.
 
Natural.

A *natural* is someone who knows exactly what he is doing, but makes it look spontaneous.
 
MzChrista said:
Those guys had good answers and mine is much the same. You want to have a plan but you cant go too much by a script. When I was pro, I would have to do step by step with clients and that was a drag.
heres the thing. Following a script is no fun, but just winging it, you can look like to aint sure and then the sub might lose some confidence in your domming.
So I plan but not too detailed.

Wasn't I just reading on another thread how you can say the same things as the rest of us, just using less words MzC? This is a great example of that.

I think you began describing the fine line that a Dom/me must tread in maintaining a subs confidence while at the same time, not seeming too scripted. Of course, most of the time I think this goes unnoticed by a sub, which is the way it should be if you're doing it well. ;)
 
zipman7 said:


Wasn't I just reading on another thread how you can say the same things as the rest of us, just using less words MzC? This is a great example of that.

I think you began describing the fine line that a Dom/me must tread in maintaining a subs confidence while at the same time, not seeming too scripted. Of course, most of the time I think this goes unnoticed by a sub, which is the way it should be if you're doing it well. ;)

Yes thats what I was getting at. Thanks.
The thing is the dom has to be into what they are doing or it isnt domming. Thats what I learned as a pro domme. So you make up a script to the subs liking, you gave up control. But yes, you want to just look like you know exactly what you want to do all the time.
 
Re: Natural.

Lancecastor said:
A *natural* is someone who knows exactly what he is doing, but makes it look spontaneous.

I thought it was a guy who's spontaneous, but looks like he knows exactly what he's doing?
 
Re: Re: Natural.

Sandia said:


I thought it was a guy who's spontaneous, but looks like he knows exactly what he's doing?

No, that's a poseur.
 
I write for a living so I avoid writing in my day to day existence.

I just get out a few of my toys and put them on a table, and I use this to "inspire" me. I also look around the house to see what needs attention.

Eb
 
Ebonyfire said:
I write for a living so I avoid writing in my day to day existence.

I just get out a few of my toys and put them on a table, and I use this to "inspire" me. I also look around the house to see what needs attention.

Eb

EB,

I don't actually write it out. I just get the order straight in my mind.
 
MzC

MzChrista said:
Following a script is no fun, but just winging it, you can look like you aint sure and then the sub might lose some confidence in your domming.
So I plan but not too detailed.

I agree. I always have a plan, sometimes it is looser than at others, due to circumstances, tools and/or equipment available, but the plan is there.

I take a lot of pride in building TRUST between the sub and myself. *FUN*,...is when I can TOTALLY surprise her,...in a way that gives her pleasure.

I love *shock* value, sometimes it involves pain,...sometimes not. When she is EXPECTING that "Whack" on her raised buttocks, is when I love to slip my tongue UNEXPECTEDLY through the wet groove of her heated sex. "Oh yeah,...hell yeah." :rose:
 
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Re: MzC

artful said:


I agree. I always have a plan, sometimes it is looser than at others, due to circumstances, tools and/or equipment available, but the plan is there.

I take a lot of pride in building TRUST between the sub and myself. *FUN*,...is when I can TOTALLY surprise her,...in a way that gives her pleasure.

I love *shock* value, sometimes it involves pain,...sometimes not. When she is EXPECTING that "Whack" on her raised buttocks, is when I love to slip my tongue UNEXPECTEDLY through wet groove of her heated sex. "Oh yeah,...hell yeah." :rose:
__________________

oh yesss it was the UNEXPECTED things that turned me on the most!! hell yeah!!:devil:
 
CarolineOh said:
Zipman posted on another thread that he likes to plan all the details of a scene in advance. That had me wondering , how common is this? I'd like to know if the dominants prefer to pre-plan as much as possible, or mostly "wing it", and I'd be curious to know what you feel the advantages and disadvantages of each approach are.


I cannot really (or rather, perhaps I shouldn't?) comment on this - but am pretty sure that Robuck has things semi-mapped out in his mind before we begin to play.

However - saying that, He is also adaptable if I run into a temporary problem.
 
It seems like most people have basically the same approach, and for good reason, because it makes a lot of sense. Thanks for all the great replies.
 
Sometimes I plan the beginning and the ending. There is a lot of leeway in the middle.
 
I run the details through My mind..all of the variations of what could be amazing..what could go wrong and which instruments of torture...oooops I mean of pleasure...I will need from start to finish...I guesstimate the time involved and the privacy that will be available.

I will make the toys available but not all of them visible to the sub as I believe that the imagination and surprise are paramount to passion.

I prefer to take a play through more than one room and more than one mood and in many directions if I am in the serious mood to enjoy my power. The directions are never predictable.
 
the reason i hesitate to call what we do "scening"

sometimes i have it mostly figured out.
sometimes i completely wing it.

i often have an idea in the back of my head, much like Ebonyfire, deciding what needs played with... sometimes digging through the toybox to find a toy i haven't played with in awhile. mostly i jump from one idea of what i want to get into and let my toybox and her reactions inspire me from there. i wing it the same as i wing every presentation, every preformance in life. the only thing i like to plan before showing off is if my story if i'm going to lie about something. i don't lie to my girl, and if i do, itz to keep surprises. so i wing it when i dom.

perhaps a little more planning would help me, but i've alwayz found planning a preformance makes me too anxious. i get hung up over details. so i just go... and run with my ideas. but i'm far from experienced or professional. and i think i might as well mention that my bondage experiments oft don't work as well irl as they do in my mind the few seconds before i put them into action.

hum... maybe i should think about this.... then again, that would break my style... okay maybe i could try incorparating a little more planning sometimes. and i'll add the qualification that even if i haven't planned something, anything on the potentially dangerous side, like candle wax, i've tested before.
 
OKAY ALRIGHT I'LL TRY PLANNING SOMETIME!!!!!

my girl asked what i was doing. i told her i was adding to my addiction, posting to the board... whichever she cared to call it.

she asked about what.

i told her.

she told me, under the guise of "hinting" that i should try planning.

i'm going to, in my ever optomistic attitude, decide that she means that planning can only improve my skills.

yes i hear the snickers. oh go blow yourself. *grin*

thank you for this thread. it opened up yet another topic for communication.
 
I would have to agree with Art and Miss Eb. I do have a plan in my mind, but like to go with the spontaneity of the situation.
 
As a student of military history

All the great Generals had a plan; but knew when it was time to ashcan it. The poor Genrals fought their plan out in detail step by step regardless of the needs of the present situation.

I would say the same would apply to Dom/mes.

I always formulate a plan and this applies to anything. I am also quite ready to chuck the thing if a better oppertunity presents itself.

Perhaps this is why I like to sub from time to time as this is something in my nature that I can switch off for a little while.
 
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