Hello everyone! Ever written a story that you didn't give your all only to feel like you really don't have what it takes to write??? Can anyone give me advice on how to overcome my doubt. One of my stories didn't make the vote. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
Depressed
- Thread starter Lolita30
- Start date
We all have doubts
You have to step back a bit and ask yourself "why am I writing at all?"
If the answer is something like "because it will bolster my self-worth if people react with great enthusiasm to what I write," then I'm not sure what words to say to lift your spirits. They will rise and fall as the Voting meter dictates.
If the answer is something like "it's a form of hobby/amusement/art, like gardening, singing, dancing, and I enjoy the process of creation," then consider: Few people who sing or who dance or who garden will ever have the satisfaction of receiving more than a few passing comments from friends and acquaintences about their efforts. Though most don't lie awake at night wondering "do I have what it takes?"
Takes to do what? Make a living at it? Precious few can pay the mortgage writing erotica. (Same with singing, art, etc.) Get a male erect? It's probably not too hard to describe a sex scene that will accomplish that much.
In between those extremes lies a vast area where we all struggle to define ourselves as writers. But at some level writing-for-its-own-sake has to appeal to you, because the feedback is often too little and infrequent.
I like to sing, but few people outside my little world have heard me. Here, there's a chance my stories will get read by people from all over the world. That's kinda cool. Even better still, some may like them.
You have to get into that sort of mindset or else this can indeed get depressing.
You have to step back a bit and ask yourself "why am I writing at all?"
If the answer is something like "because it will bolster my self-worth if people react with great enthusiasm to what I write," then I'm not sure what words to say to lift your spirits. They will rise and fall as the Voting meter dictates.
If the answer is something like "it's a form of hobby/amusement/art, like gardening, singing, dancing, and I enjoy the process of creation," then consider: Few people who sing or who dance or who garden will ever have the satisfaction of receiving more than a few passing comments from friends and acquaintences about their efforts. Though most don't lie awake at night wondering "do I have what it takes?"
Takes to do what? Make a living at it? Precious few can pay the mortgage writing erotica. (Same with singing, art, etc.) Get a male erect? It's probably not too hard to describe a sex scene that will accomplish that much.
In between those extremes lies a vast area where we all struggle to define ourselves as writers. But at some level writing-for-its-own-sake has to appeal to you, because the feedback is often too little and infrequent.
I like to sing, but few people outside my little world have heard me. Here, there's a chance my stories will get read by people from all over the world. That's kinda cool. Even better still, some may like them.
You have to get into that sort of mindset or else this can indeed get depressing.
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G
Guest
Guest
Lolita, I swing between periods of doubt, insecurity and utter worthlessness; and states where I feel I'm great and my ego knows no bounds. I guess its natural. I don't think anyone is ever satisfied with themselves.
My latest story was trashed by some people and for some time I felt really depressed. Then I submitted it anyway and stopped caring what people thought of it. Its my work and even if its bad, its a part of my creation. I cannot be good all the time. I'm sometimes mediocre and its ok.
Of course it hurts when we do not get acceptance. Other people's appreciation is important. When we don't get it, we feel bad. But you have to learn not to rely on other's comments. Someone out there might be voting 1 cos he's envious of you.
So what I was trying to say is that this phase will pass. Just hang on in there and keep writing. That's the only way to get better.
-DP.
My latest story was trashed by some people and for some time I felt really depressed. Then I submitted it anyway and stopped caring what people thought of it. Its my work and even if its bad, its a part of my creation. I cannot be good all the time. I'm sometimes mediocre and its ok.
Of course it hurts when we do not get acceptance. Other people's appreciation is important. When we don't get it, we feel bad. But you have to learn not to rely on other's comments. Someone out there might be voting 1 cos he's envious of you.
So what I was trying to say is that this phase will pass. Just hang on in there and keep writing. That's the only way to get better.
-DP.
damppanties
Tinkle, twinkle
- Joined
- May 7, 2002
- Posts
- 16,276
the last post...
...was mine. I don't know why it suddenly decided to 'unregister' me.
-DP.
...was mine. I don't know why it suddenly decided to 'unregister' me.
-DP.
the_bragis
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 25, 2002
- Posts
- 389
Chin up!
Lolita,
Ever written a story that you didn't give your all...
I am assuming meant to say...did give you all.
"Didn't make the vote". You mean like it was rejected by Literotica, or it has been accepted but it hasn't had a good response from readers?
If it's been rejected by Lit, there is a reason. It's either too short, too many typos, too something... That is fixable.
If it's a low vote you're referring to, don't be too concerned. There's already been a good deal of discussion on that in here, so I'm not going to reiterate it all. See the threads 'Count me out of voting' and 'The H files'.
Still feeling low? Consider this. Maybe you have a really great story in your head but it's just not getting onto the pages quite right. That's where a good editor can help, and there are over 30 of them listed here in Lit. Better still these good and talented people offer their services free!
Short as your posting was, I got the feeling you write straight from your heart, and you know what? That's a quality money just can't buy.
Have a great day, and good luck with your future writing.
Alex (female variety)
Lolita,
Ever written a story that you didn't give your all...
I am assuming meant to say...did give you all.
"Didn't make the vote". You mean like it was rejected by Literotica, or it has been accepted but it hasn't had a good response from readers?
If it's been rejected by Lit, there is a reason. It's either too short, too many typos, too something... That is fixable.
If it's a low vote you're referring to, don't be too concerned. There's already been a good deal of discussion on that in here, so I'm not going to reiterate it all. See the threads 'Count me out of voting' and 'The H files'.
Still feeling low? Consider this. Maybe you have a really great story in your head but it's just not getting onto the pages quite right. That's where a good editor can help, and there are over 30 of them listed here in Lit. Better still these good and talented people offer their services free!
Short as your posting was, I got the feeling you write straight from your heart, and you know what? That's a quality money just can't buy.
Have a great day, and good luck with your future writing.
Alex (female variety)
vic450
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jun 17, 2002
- Posts
- 636
Lolita30,
As NCmVoyeur's reply states, we all have doubts.
I've learned the hard way that counting on votes and stats is useless. Enjoy what you write, write what you enjoy. Let the exhibitionist in you share what you're enjoying and those who share your vision of pleasure will come to you.
NCmVoyeur is correct. It depends on why you're writing. I find that when I write, I'm really writing to women. To turn them on. How do I do it? It comes down to writing style. It took a couple of smacks from NCmVoyeur to make me realize this.
Oh, don't get me wrong. It's nice to get feedback and see the votes push your ratings up. But even if a story I've written does not have high stats, I enjoy getting the occassional email telling me why the reader enjoyed it or why they didn't like it. *Those* are the ones I use to judge my story's worth.
I've written pieces that took me three hours, half asleep, that people absolutely love. I've also written pieces that took me weeks to write that people thought was 'okay' at best. And sometimes that's not true either. So, giving something your all and getting nothing of worth back is the norm.
As Bragis said, getting rejected by Lit doesn't mean anything except technically there's something that hasn't conformed with their guidelines. I've gotten two items that were rejected. Usually doesn't take that long to fix and resubmit.
My advice? Keep writing. Write short things, write long things. Write funny things and write sad things. Let people see. Let people comment. Don't feel sad if they didn't like it. Ask them why they didn't like it. It hurts but in the end, it helps your writing in the future.
Besides, you can always edit and resubmit.
Good luck.
Be well and safe,
Vic
As NCmVoyeur's reply states, we all have doubts.
I've learned the hard way that counting on votes and stats is useless.
Enjoy what you write, write what you enjoy. Let the exhibitionist in you share what you're enjoying and those who share your vision of pleasure will come to you.NCmVoyeur is correct. It depends on why you're writing. I find that when I write, I'm really writing to women. To turn them on. How do I do it? It comes down to writing style. It took a couple of smacks from NCmVoyeur to make me realize this.
Oh, don't get me wrong. It's nice to get feedback and see the votes push your ratings up. But even if a story I've written does not have high stats, I enjoy getting the occassional email telling me why the reader enjoyed it or why they didn't like it. *Those* are the ones I use to judge my story's worth.
I've written pieces that took me three hours, half asleep, that people absolutely love. I've also written pieces that took me weeks to write that people thought was 'okay' at best. And sometimes that's not true either. So, giving something your all and getting nothing of worth back is the norm.
As Bragis said, getting rejected by Lit doesn't mean anything except technically there's something that hasn't conformed with their guidelines. I've gotten two items that were rejected. Usually doesn't take that long to fix and resubmit.
My advice? Keep writing. Write short things, write long things. Write funny things and write sad things. Let people see. Let people comment. Don't feel sad if they didn't like it. Ask them why they didn't like it. It hurts but in the end, it helps your writing in the future.
Besides, you can always edit and resubmit.
Good luck.
Be well and safe,
Vic
Dolma Kalem
Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 7, 2002
- Posts
- 48
Lolita30
You have what it takes to write, otherwise you wouldn't be here. I largely agree with the feedback above. Take all the feedback as positive, even the stuff that hurts a little.
Most of the writers understand what you're going through. It's part of the process, even Douglas Adams, of Hitch Hikers guide to the galaxy fame., had his problems. I thought that HHGG was the most imaginitive story I'd ever read.
Look for stimulation. And don't be too critical of your self. Reflect on the best bits of your writing. All you need to do, is get the other bits to that standard.
For me, the most important bit is to enjoy the process. As someone said before, stay in the area that turns you on. You'll write better, and if it turns you on it will turn other people on.
I love your name. Very sexy!
Dolma Kalem’s stories
Office games
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=40866
Contract End
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=40872
Please feel free to help me write, through your feedback, or share your ideas and experiences.
Whatever, have a great day. And may your god go with you.
You have what it takes to write, otherwise you wouldn't be here. I largely agree with the feedback above. Take all the feedback as positive, even the stuff that hurts a little.
Most of the writers understand what you're going through. It's part of the process, even Douglas Adams, of Hitch Hikers guide to the galaxy fame., had his problems. I thought that HHGG was the most imaginitive story I'd ever read.
Look for stimulation. And don't be too critical of your self. Reflect on the best bits of your writing. All you need to do, is get the other bits to that standard.
For me, the most important bit is to enjoy the process. As someone said before, stay in the area that turns you on. You'll write better, and if it turns you on it will turn other people on.
I love your name. Very sexy!
Dolma Kalem’s stories
Office games
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=40866
Contract End
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=40872
Please feel free to help me write, through your feedback, or share your ideas and experiences.
Whatever, have a great day. And may your god go with you.
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