Denial Versus the Forced Orgasm

[SweetDommes]

~~grin~~ sounds like Your boy is in a win win situation!

heehee, I don't know that he would agree on that ... and of course, it depends on if we want him to "win" or not ...

 

[Shadowsdream]

Would love for this to be a relevant question in my life, but I have serijules' difficulty reaching orgasm, multiplied. I have to force orgasms by myself and I've never had a problem holding back when someone else was stimulating me.

I think it would be an amazing rush to be forced into that against my will. I'd probably express many of the same emotions others have before me, but being the humiliation slut that I am, I'd love it on a deep level. Especially in context to certain scenes where it's just not right to come, yet here I am doing it...

I like denial, for the most part. Well, "like" doesn't really apply. It's a good kind of frustrating, the sort where a.) I am constantly aware of my bond with T, and b.) I'm *pretty* sure my patience will outlast his. Sometimes it hasn't; again, those skin-surface-harrowing experiences are some of the most satisfying on the more permanent level.

Arg! I want it all!

Hello quint..

you bring up an important aspect of the Forced Orgasm...the humiliation aspect....a submissive that is kinked to humiliation can be taken to an orgasm against their will even quicker and harder when a disinterested, calm and distinct mode of humiliating verbal content is incorporated along with the physical torment...even a submissive that generally has a very difficult time orgasming can be driven over the sexual edge fairly easily. In actuality the submissive generally orgasms much more easily being forced than any other way.

 

[Shadowsdream]

I tend to use denial, and rather than force I also like this:

"I'm getting bored. You're on my schedule. You have 20 seconds to finish this the fuck up or you don't get off."

Sometimes works, sometimes doesn't. Not my problem either way, and either way is thoroughly enjoyable. It's a heady power trip to be very blase about something that the other person is completely in the throes of.

Hello Netzach and welcome to the conversation!

Another interesting point *blase* I agree 100% on its use!
Works perfectly with denial..and the *you had your chance O well! *attitude is one that I adopt without remorse as well....
Ahhh the life of a Dominant!
*blase* is a wonderful add on to humiliation is it not?

 

[Shadowsdream]

hmm...of course, I have to disagree with the majority, but i have to say osmethign first...

I don't orgasm with a partner, it has only happened with one person (male or female...and yes, it was the first dom I ever had) I think it is a deep seeded mental isse., but that is neither here nor there...
I have to masturbate at least once a day, and I have to have multiple orgasms, or I will be on edge the rest of the day...I don't know why this is, it just is...and yes, I do go through a lot of batteries...lol

with him, I am not allowed to play with my toys, adn so I go a little nuts...so he enjoys torturing me by restraining me with my arms bound straight above my head (so I won't bite myself in trying to stop an orgasm) and my legs spead wide...and forcing me to have multiple orgasms, until my whole body is shaking...and I love the way he just plays me like a fiddle...he so enjoys the looks on my face when he tells me not to cum, and I can't help it, cause it has been days...so he punishs me by putting a nice vibrating toy right on my overly sensitive clit until I do it again...I knw maybe it doesn't sound like punishment, but I assure you it is...and I love it even as I am wishing he would stop soon...so as far as the debate goes...forced orgasm over denail anyday in my book...

Hello hurtme and welcome

The sexual make up of each unique submissive is what makes it particularly interesting for Us Dominants...no two will react the same to Denial or Forced Orgasms...*playing you like a fiddle* is a very apt way to describe exactly what is happening and who is in control. A delicious agony which often creates one of those love/hate relationships with the acts being performed.
your Master is very kind to bind you so tightly..I am of the evil persuasion that likes to watch the submissive bite themselves....something about it always makes Me laugh that deep throated laugh that is better avoided...

Thank you for discussing the pros and cons for you....

 

[zipman]

Hey Pretty Lady! Long time no see!


I have always derived an immense pleasure in making a woman orgasm, and therefore, denying one goes against what I want to have happen.

I love the forced orgasm, or actually, multiple forced orgasms. My fiancee orgasms incredibly easily, so it is not unusual for her to have between 4-8 orgasms in a session. There are times that she has begged me to stop because the nerves in her pussy were so sensitive that she couldn't take it. I always make her have at least 1 if not 2 more after she begs like that!

One technique I enjoy is to make her fantasize out loud about something "shameful" she may or may not desire and then force her to have an orgasm, while blaming it on the fantasy and not on whatever physical stimulation I was providing her.

The results are always very intense, and she has admitted things and screamed out things that both surprised me and pleased me greatly!

Good topic, btw!

 

[Shadowsdream]

Hey Pretty Lady! Long time no see!


I have always derived an immense pleasure in making a woman orgasm, and therefore, denying one goes against what I want to have happen.

I love the forced orgasm, or actually, multiple forced orgasms. My fiancee orgasms incredibly easily, so it is not unusual for her to have between 4-8 orgasms in a session. There are times that she has begged me to stop because the nerves in her pussy were so sensitive that she couldn't take it. I always make her have at least 1 if not 2 more after she begs like that!

One technique I enjoy is to make her fantasize out loud about something "shameful" she may or may not desire and then force her to have an orgasm, while blaming it on the fantasy and not on whatever physical stimulation I was providing her.

The results are always very intense, and she has admitted things and screamed out things that both surprised me and pleased me greatly!

Good topic, btw!

Hello My Friend!

I have greatly missed Your voice here and welcome You to this conversation.

I had not considered the idea of making the object of My attention confess or fantasize aloud while I torment physically and vocally. BUT now of course I may just have to do that this evening...yahooooo.com!
Begging even when allowed can be a very good reason to torment even further...I certainly am in agreement with that thought where My slutty slave is concerned.

Thank You for adding this dimension to the thread..and hey! Stick around for awhile....

 

[FungiUg]

Forced Orgasms are also very entertaining for the Dominant are they not?

Well, in the one occasion where I used it, the submissive had been trained to orgasm by voice command, and I simply repeatedly instructed her to cum... and cum... and cum... and cum...

She essentially lost all control of her own body, and it was complete physical domination, but through mental control. Interesting... but very much a punishment from her point of view, since she didn't get to enjoy the orgasms.

I think it's just kinda cool how pleasure can be used to punish...

 

[catalina_francisco]

LOL..well we are not in sync with this issue!! I personally prefer denied/withheld orgasm, while naturally he prefers (though does love both) the anguish I go through when he decides to force orgasm. He loves the added power of pushing me through that when I am all orgasmed out, and the fear I go through that after a series of multiple orgasms under his talented direction, I will fail to please him and be unable to achieve that point he is demanding. Of course if it causes physical pain, though not in the extreme which can have long lasting effects, he loves it more.

Catalina

 

[Shadowsdream]

Well, in the one occasion where I used it, the submissive had been trained to orgasm by voice command, and I simply repeatedly instructed her to cum... and cum... and cum... and cum...

She essentially lost all control of her own body, and it was complete physical domination, but through mental control. Interesting... but very much a punishment from her point of view, since she didn't get to enjoy the orgasms.

I think it's just kinda cool how pleasure can be used to punish...

Too much pleasure is as bad as not enough it would seem ~~grin~~

 

[Shadowsdream]

LOL..well we are not in sync with this issue!! I personally prefer denied/withheld orgasm, while naturally he prefers (though does love both) the anguish I go through when he decides to force orgasm. He loves the added power of pushing me through that when I am all orgasmed out, and the fear I go through that after a series of multiple orgasms under his talented direction, I will fail to please him and be unable to achieve that point he is demanding. Of course if it causes physical pain, though not in the extreme which can have long lasting effects, he loves it more.

Catalina

Nice to have this point of view catalina!

Being out of sync on such issues is actually the point! LOL
I would be interested in hearing about the physical pain and how it is experienced by both the male and female submissive in the Forced Orgasm scenerio. It would seem that this pain is more physical while the Denial is more emotional?

 

[catalina_francisco]

Nice to have this point of view catalina!

Being out of sync on such issues is actually the point! LOL
I would be interested in hearing about the physical pain and how it is experienced by both the male and female submissive in the Forced Orgasm scenerio. It would seem that this pain is more physical while the Denial is more emotional?

For me, physical pain in this circumstance seems to relate to an over taxing of internal muscles which result in extreme pain over a number of days or couple of weeks. That naturally inhibits some of my abilities to please and serve without an unexpected gasp here and there, so therefore unfairly intruds on his ability to enjoy his possession to the full potential and desire.

Catalina

 

[Kajira Callista]

I think overstimulation in any way makes the body react in a negative way. then you have to use your mental abilty to bring yourself to where you are being told to be and the combo of the physically irritating and mental forcing makes it painful all around but truly fulfilling in the end...when you get the "good girl" if i had a tail i would be wagging it right now

 

[Shadowsdream]

I think overstimulation in any way makes the body react in a negative way. then you have to use your mental abilty to bring yourself to where you are being told to be and the combo of the physically irritating and mental forcing makes it painful all around but truly fulfilling in the end...when you get the "good girl" if i had a tail i would be wagging it right now

Welcome Kajira Callista!

I must say I do like the tail wagging image ~~grin~~

Overstimulation....good way of putting it! The too much of a good thing driving one to hell from heaven and back again with a simple two word statement!

A very simplistic thought come to from a very complex angle. I am going to enjoy having your voice in My conversations...

 

[Shadowsdream]

For me, physical pain in this circumstance seems to relate to an over taxing of internal muscles which result in extreme pain over a number of days or couple of weeks. That naturally inhibits some of my abilities to please and serve without an unexpected gasp here and there, so therefore unfairly intruds on his ability to enjoy his possession to the full potential and desire.

Catalina

Thank you catalino for answering this question that has had My nosey side peeked with interest!

 

[enigma nocturne]

Very good points enigma and welcome to the conversation!

May I ask if either scene causes you to feel more or less submissive at the culmination? Does either possibility make your desire for permitted Orgasm more or less intense?

Thanks for the welcome.

Forced orgasm makes me feel more submissive, I think. I am not sure why. I have a few ideas, like maybe it is because I really enjoy your basic interrogation scene and your blackmail type force scene. Not a rape scene, those leave me cold. But something like "Fuck me, or I will destroy your family, the evil bad computer files will hit the local televsion stations, I will sell your puppy to the gypsies, or you will never graduate from this esteemed intstitution..." works for me. And then the response is "okay, but I am not going to enjoy it!" sort of thing. Which makes it into a situation where I am going to be forced to have fun.

The other thing is, if I am told that I am not going to be allowed to orgasm, my focus changes and it becomes not a priority of the scene. I scene a lot where The Big O is not the final culmination. For instance, last Christmas I played with a Domme who is really into needleplay. Her goal was to turn me into a Christmas Tree, which she did, but again the goal was not The Big O, so it did not bother me. If you came to me and said "I am going to tease and tease and not let you come." something in my head would change this to an endurance thing. My mindset changes and I focus on NOT lettting it happen. My goal becomes not letting THe Big O happen, I am working with the Dom/me to achieve control over over my body.

It is weird how some people's mind works, no?

 

[jpschust]

i have a passion for both- i love long long long denial. something very sexy about having to beg for it. there is also something great about being forced to orgasm time and time again, to the point where its almost painful!

 

[hurtme]

the reason he binds my arms like that is so that I won't bite myself in an effort to stop myself form having an orgasm...which of course doesn't really work, since I enjoy being bitten, it excites me, but it goves me something else to focus on...
he likes to make me beg during forced orgasm as well as denial...I am an issue with my pride, sometimes (ok, a lot of the time) I have wayyy to much of it, and he is trying to get me to let go of it, for my sake, as well as his pleasure...so he takes every chance he can to make me beg, to reduce me to a quivering pile so that I can't even begin to think about having any pride, all I can think about it my most base desires...and the fact that I will do anything to please him...

 

[astralkiss]

Let's see...First of all to clarify I am not a live-in slave or sub or something like that, not yet at least. I am merely a submissive woman playing and exploring with her dominant partner.

I do not enjoy orgasm denial at all physically. My body cries out for fulfillment, and he reminds me verbally not to let it go over the edge, and inside I am flying because I know he is in control, and I feel my submissive "need" being fulfilled and I am happy that I can make him happy. Physically my body is crying out and being rebellious to what I want it to do, and to have to control it for him, to me, is almost serving him in a way that breaches to the core of who I am. And the moment he says that I can cum, if he decides to let me, or the look on his face as I fight it, makes it all the sweeter.

As far as forced orgasm, it's hard for him sometimes to do it because I am extremely multi-orgasmic. But when he did it almost becomes physically painful, and I know he is not really sadistic, more often dominating, so he prefers the former, instead of causing me physical pain.

Just my two cents!

 

[JoseIsWild]

I've never had a forced orgasm, nor do I think I like it much. However, I have been denied orgasms on many occasions which sometimes ends up being physically painful (blue balls). If my tormentor doesn't stop when I'm ready to cum, I usually can't hold it back for long at all and end up cumming anyway.

 

[TulaneCowboy]

I've found the most useful combination with Matthew is to bind and gag him, then deny him orgasm for a number of hours. Depending on his mood and level of tiredness, this can be anywhere from 1 to 4 hours. Once he's beyond mewling, begging, attempts at self-satisfaction and crying, his will is broken. I'm then ready to move on. He's then given a number of orgasms, the later ones forced, until he screams and often passes out. I gather him into my arms and cradle him until he wakes, then we sleep. The next day, he positively glows from satisfaction and has the most adorable "peek from under his lashes" shy boy look.

Matthew, I know you'll read this and I know you'll be embarassed and excited. Blush for me beautiful boy. Blush for me.

 

[hurtme]

I know pain with a forced orgasm has been mentioned several times...the only "pain" that really really bothers me is when he ties me up and uses some sort of vibrating toy...after I orgasm my clit is really overstimualted, and if he doesn't let up, my body will shake and twitch almost violently because of the intense sensations...I try not to think of it as pain...and he doesn't do it often, but if I have been especailly misbehaved, like cuming before I was told to...

 

[Shadowsdream]

Thanks for the welcome.

Forced orgasm makes me feel more submissive, I think. I am not sure why. I have a few ideas, like maybe it is because I really enjoy your basic interrogation scene and your blackmail type force scene. Not a rape scene, those leave me cold. But something like "Fuck me, or I will destroy your family, the evil bad computer files will hit the local televsion stations, I will sell your puppy to the gypsies, or you will never graduate from this esteemed intstitution..." works for me. And then the response is "okay, but I am not going to enjoy it!" sort of thing. Which makes it into a situation where I am going to be forced to have fun.

The other thing is, if I am told that I am not going to be allowed to orgasm, my focus changes and it becomes not a priority of the scene. I scene a lot where The Big O is not the final culmination. For instance, last Christmas I played with a Domme who is really into needleplay. Her goal was to turn me into a Christmas Tree, which she did, but again the goal was not The Big O, so it did not bother me. If you came to me and said "I am going to tease and tease and not let you come." something in my head would change this to an endurance thing. My mindset changes and I focus on NOT lettting it happen. My goal becomes not letting THe Big O happen, I am working with the Dom/me to achieve control over over my body.

It is weird how some people's mind works, no?

Thank you for mentioning that the Big *O* is not always the primary function of a good scene. If it is always the primary function there is little mystery in the end result.
Focus change begins in the mind and of course it is the mind that must control or betray the body. Denial causes the mind to use will power to stop an orgasm...but the Forced Orgasm causes the mind to focus on simply surviving the sensations.
Forcing physically with toys or the hand compounded by the voice and humiliation can take the mind and hence the body into chaos. Denial seldom causes chaos!

 

[Shadowsdream]

i have a passion for both- i love long long long denial. something very sexy about having to beg for it. there is also something great about being forced to orgasm time and time again, to the point where its almost painful!

Hello jpschust and welcome to the conversation!

Passion for or against are valid points. Some submissives can crave either control and others dread one or both types. A combination of dread and passion truly is the ultimate love/hate relationship in My world!

Thank you for participating in this conversation.

 

[Shadowsdream]

the reason he binds my arms like that is so that I won't bite myself in an effort to stop myself form having an orgasm...which of course doesn't really work, since I enjoy being bitten, it excites me, but it goves me something else to focus on...
he likes to make me beg during forced orgasm as well as denial...I am an issue with my pride, sometimes (ok, a lot of the time) I have wayyy to much of it, and he is trying to get me to let go of it, for my sake, as well as his pleasure...so he takes every chance he can to make me beg, to reduce me to a quivering pile so that I can't even begin to think about having any pride, all I can think about it my most base desires...and the fact that I will do anything to please him...

~~grin~~ it would appear that your Master knows the very best ways to send you in directions that He finds most beneficial to your growth and His ultimate pleasure!

Biting ones self does give you that new focal point for a certain amount of time and in actuallity will also simply delay the eventuallity of the orgasm. Adding bondage also gives one something (resistance) to fight against and has a temporary resistance mode as well. BUT as you have pointed out...even resistance does not stop eventuallity! ~~grin~~

 

[Shadowsdream]

Let's see...First of all to clarify I am not a live-in slave or sub or something like that, not yet at least. I am merely a submissive woman playing and exploring with her dominant partner.

I do not enjoy orgasm denial at all physically. My body cries out for fulfillment, and he reminds me verbally not to let it go over the edge, and inside I am flying because I know he is in control, and I feel my submissive "need" being fulfilled and I am happy that I can make him happy. Physically my body is crying out and being rebellious to what I want it to do, and to have to control it for him, to me, is almost serving him in a way that breaches to the core of who I am. And the moment he says that I can cum, if he decides to let me, or the look on his face as I fight it, makes it all the sweeter.

As far as forced orgasm, it's hard for him sometimes to do it because I am extremely multi-orgasmic. But when he did it almost becomes physically painful, and I know he is not really sadistic, more often dominating, so he prefers the former, instead of causing me physical pain.

Just my two cents!

Hello and welcome astralkiss, thank you for your thoughtful addition to this conversation!

First of all I will address the live in live out submissive/slave issue. I doubt the sensations, desires or end results realy give a rats ass damn where you live or for how long ~~grin~~

Orgasms have a way of not caring about location as much as they desire a possibility of occurring or not.

Accepting Denial truly is a powerful sign of service, devotion and obedience. When the suffering is genuine and does not cause any negative feelings towards the Dominant causing said discomfort but an appreciation for the reasoning behind it. Of course the reasoning will be different in each relationship or training.

Yes you little multi orgasmic toys do pose a bit more of a dilemma in the Forced Orgasm scenerio which We have found can be over come as you mentioned so eloquently...by Forcing beyond the natural culmination that the body desires.

Thank you for the insight through your own experiences astralkiss.