demanding wannabees...need NOT apply

[northstar_d]

no comment

 

[RawHumor]

I'm sorry for your experiences.

Such are the reasons why when a new person comes on here looking for a Master and then, 20-60 minutes later, announces that she's found someone and is now owned, a lot of us just shake our heads in despair.

There are a lot of ass hats out there. Anyone who tells you it's not your place to ask questions should immediately be discounted.

If you can't ask questions, then how can you possibly learn? I mean, especially if there's no physical interaction, 90% of the interaction is mental, and if you can't feel free to ask things, then you're pretty much just being a puppet.

 

[JamieB]

I'm sorry for your experiences.

Such are the reasons why when a new person comes on here looking for a Master and then, 20-60 minutes later, announces that she's found someone and is now owned, a lot of us just shake our heads in despair.

There are a lot of ass hats out there. Anyone who tells you it's not your place to ask questions should immediately be discounted.

If you can't ask questions, then how can you possibly learn? I mean, especially if there's no physical interaction, 90% of the interaction is mental, and if you can't feel free to ask things, then you're pretty much just being a puppet.

Well said.

A D/s relationship is, at its core, a relationship like any other. Both partners have needs, both partners play an important role in the relationship, and both partners deserve respect.

J

 

[northstar_d]

Thank You for Your understanding...while I am not without faults, I truly allow myself to delve into my role of submissive, I truly work in giving and responding to my Master.

 

[northstar_d]

I'm sorry for your experiences.

Such are the reasons why when a new person comes on here looking for a Master and then, 20-60 minutes later, announces that she's found someone and is now owned, a lot of us just shake our heads in despair.

There are a lot of ass hats out there. Anyone who tells you it's not your place to ask questions should immediately be discounted.

If you can't ask questions, then how can you possibly learn? I mean, especially if there's no physical interaction, 90% of the interaction is mental, and if you can't feel free to ask things, then you're pretty much just being a puppet.

Again, I thank You for Your understanding. I feel misplaced in this gendre...I am a fool who let "HIM" in, too far, into my vanilla life...and the expectation was so huge, it jeopardized my vanilla life to an extent that "HE" will never know. my apologies for coming on so harshly, when really, my quest was for the "ONE". Lots of wannabees out there, who, when they don't get their way, lash out and then run from the damage. Where are the STRONG One's? Where are the REAL One's?....

 

[Evil_Geoff]

... Where are the STRONG One's? Where are the REAL One's?....

For the most part, they are anyplace _except_ online.

They are in local groups sharing their experience and wisdom or learning new things.

They are playing with people either in their homes or at public dungeons or play parties.

They are, for the most part, spending most of their time in the real world, living real lives, having real relationships.

Finding decent Doms on line is tough. Why? Because in the BDSM lifestyle, Dominant Males are the 2nd smallest demographic group, the only smaller group are the Dominant Females. The largest group is submissive males followed closely by submissive females.

Depending on which survey you want to believe, the ratio of Dominants to submissives is anywhere from 1 to 5 to as bad as 1 to 10. But in online forums you will often find what appears to be a damn near 1 to 1 ratio out there. Doing the math we then see that anywhere from 4 out of 5 to as high as 9 out of 10 people claiming to be Dominants are NOT. Hello, as a basic number you can write off 80% of the bozos who claim to be Dominants.

Spend a little time educating yourself, and WATCHING people. You will begin to discern who is actually a Dominant and has a clue, and who the cyberDom pretendabe's are.

Good hunting!

 

[phenomenal]

Good post. The title intrigued me so I had to come read this.
I hope you find the real deal.
Online fakes suck.

So, my post today is ...has anyone ever began a relationship and given a lot of themselves, in hopes that the person they shared with, really valued what they had? I'm talking about, the sincere folks that strive for contact in the D's world, while living a completely separate, vanilla life otherwise?

Why is it that the wannabee Masters demand such huge amounts and give little back? submissives are to "understand" that their place is to not ask questions and to just sit back and take orders. Sure, as a submissive, I strive to please my Master, within the confines of a vanilla life style...so when you ask for pictures so unreasonable, what do you really expect,unless you are there to take them, yourself?

This post is to announce that I do NOT see any value in a demanding wannabee...you want our minds, Masters out there, but what do you give back in return? fantasy lifestyles, mystery and intrigue...all the crap that YOU have made up in your minds...and hope that unsuspecting, naive woman will fall for.

Trust is a huge word. being nothing, with no rights for expectations...is an awful lot to ask of someone.

Are there any REAL Dom's out there? Ones who value the gift of a submissive soul? Ones who are compassionate, REAL and trustworthy?

It is with truth and honesty I post here...those who "wannabee Masters" need not apply.

The Ones that are truly a mockery of the lifestyle KNOW who they are.

 

[JamieB]

Depending on which survey you want to believe, the ratio of Dominants to submissives is anywhere from 1 to 5 to as bad as 1 to 10. But in online forums you will often find what appears to be a damn near 1 to 1 ratio out there. Doing the math we then see that anywhere from 4 out of 5 to as high as 9 out of 10 people claiming to be Dominants are NOT. Hello, as a basic number you can write off 80% of the bozos who claim to be Dominants.

Spend a little time educating yourself, and WATCHING people. You will begin to discern who is actually a Dominant and has a clue, and who the cyberDom pretendabe's are.

Good hunting!

I do most of my Domming online these days, but I completely agree with EG's post. if I had a nickel for every time I saw a post on these boards from a "Dom" that made my skin crawl....

Be careful and take your time. The guy you're after won't be in a hurry.

J

 

[northstar_d]

Thank you J...again, I am very appreciative that there are people that care. I have learned some very very valuable lessons.

northstar

 

[northstar_d]

For the most part, they are anyplace _except_ online.

They are in local groups sharing their experience and wisdom or learning new things.

They are playing with people either in their homes or at public dungeons or play parties.

They are, for the most part, spending most of their time in the real world, living real lives, having real relationships.

Finding decent Doms on line is tough. Why? Because in the BDSM lifestyle, Dominant Males are the 2nd smallest demographic group, the only smaller group are the Dominant Females. The largest group is submissive males followed closely by submissive females.

Depending on which survey you want to believe, the ratio of Dominants to submissives is anywhere from 1 to 5 to as bad as 1 to 10. But in online forums you will often find what appears to be a damn near 1 to 1 ratio out there. Doing the math we then see that anywhere from 4 out of 5 to as high as 9 out of 10 people claiming to be Dominants are NOT. Hello, as a basic number you can write off 80% of the bozos who claim to be Dominants.

Spend a little time educating yourself, and WATCHING people. You will begin to discern who is actually a Dominant and has a clue, and who the cyberDom pretendabe's are.

Good hunting!

E.G.: Thank you..and you are absolutely right...I did have to occaission to meet a wonderful Master online, met Him real time and given the circumstances of every day life, it was a wonderful match.

Recently, I took into confidence someone who I respected and was learning from.

I think I will just sit back and reflect on this past year.

be well, and thank you again.

northstar

 

[northstar_d]

Good post. The title intrigued me so I had to come read this.
I hope you find the real deal.
Online fakes suck.

phenom: Thanks for your support.

northstar

 

[GentleSub_Ivy]

northstar,

Good luck in your search. I do believe we can find what we are looking for if we take our time. For me, I had to step back to reevaluate what I really wanted.

As EG said, online is difficult, but I do believe it is possible to find someone "real."

Take care of yourself and don't give up.

 

[Hotat21]

Are we only talking about male Doms? I'm a female dom. And I'd rather pleasure my slave then vice-versa. Knowing that they like what I'm doing turns me on something fierce. I encourage questions. I want to make the experience as good as possible.

 

[GentleSub_Ivy]

Are we only talking about male Doms? I'm a female dom. And I'd rather pleasure my slave then vice-versa. Knowing that they like what I'm doing turns me on something fierce. I encourage questions. I want to make the experience as good as possible.

I'm sure the thread can apply to both, and you sound lovely.

 

[Hotat21]

I'm sure the thread can apply to both, and you sound lovely.

Ok. I juust wanted to make sure.

 

[Lord Crimson]

post no longer needed

 

[wetwanda]

[COLOR="Red"]Words cannot convey the lessons learned. Being of no value and personally compromised is not worth it. Definitely not ever worth it. the choice of what to lose and when to lose it was never an option. No subbie should ever feel the FEAR , not ever. [/COLOR]