Deception

[lavender]

 

[Fenix]

I don't know how to deal with it, but I agree so many people lie about themselves on the net. I hate it!! Hopefully people here don't

 

[PacificBlue]

I'm dealing with this issue right now...I've recently begun chatting with someone via the net and within the first week and a half I caught him in 2 different lies...he gave half way decent reasons for both but there's a part of me that wonders if I can believe him at all. He swears up and down that he will never lie to me again that he really likes me...but still??? Maybe I'm just being a fool. I've been reading through old threads of people who've been deceived by others via the net and I'm sick to my stomach thinking about it.

As far as people that I see on a face to face basis...I find it difficult to get over lies especially if they profess to honestly care about or love me. It belittles everything they've said. I'd much rather have the truth and have it hurt than to be lied to.

 

[Desert Amazon]

 

[beckbabe]

Of course the closer the relationship, the more the lies would hurt. I'd rather be punched in the face than lied to, unfortunately, a great number of people lie all the time. I think that doubles on the Internet where people feel "anonymous." I feel it's an issue of self esteem, no one is big enough to make me lie.

 

[Morden]

I despise open betrayal. I find it leaves a bad taste in everyones mouth. I try to never decieve. There are of course times that I unfortunately do. It is usually only on matters that are best left hidden. This ones are simple things such as no I didn't drink the last bit of milk <crosses fingers>. hehe. Anyone who out and out decieves those who he cares about or those who would be in a position to be hurt by the news should reconsider thier choices. It can be a dissastorous choice to make and one that paints you as nothing more then a pathetic human being.

 

[Laurel]

Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy, but discretion is the better part of valor. Always tell the truth, but that doesn't mean you should necessarily tell your boss you think her dress is ugly. Unless she asks, of course.

And am I the only one who feels there must be a wild story behind the making of this thread.

 

[Demian]

I am not one that gives my trust out lightly, by an means. Therefore, when I am deceived it is a very big ordeal for me. Deception is such an ugly thing. To cause another human to trust you under a false pretense, I find revolting?

Do you feel deception is such a grave thing?

Would you feel more deceived by the lies of a casual lover or the lies of a trusted friend?

For me, the lies of a trusted friend get under my skin and remain with me far longer than those of a casual lover.

I understand why people feel the need to deceive at times. However, I think the truth may always be better. Because eventually, the truth rears its ugly head.

I'm not talking about little white lies here, I'm talking about significant details.

I guess trust/deception are issues that are on my mind a lot lately. Deception in RL and on the internet are issues we deal with frequently. Moreso on the net than in real life.

How do you cope with these things?

You're not one of those who Believes rap videos, are you?...

 

[registered "^^"]

we have

all been and have deceived, at one time or another.....

 

[Cheyenne]

And am I the only one who feels there must be a wild story behind the making of this thread.

Nope, you're not.

I just hope it wasn't someone from here who she had a problem with. I like Lit being like Ireland- no snakes.

 

[Svedish_Chef]

I am not one that gives my trust out lightly, by an means. Therefore, when I am deceived it is a very big ordeal for me. Deception is such an ugly thing. To cause another human to trust you under a false pretense, I find revolting?

Half believe... and add up details inside your head till it fits properly

I dont decieve, I dont lie, I may be a bastard but at least everyone knows where they stand with me

And if you want to be friends with me not lying would be good...

 

[p_p_man]

That's the trouble with the net...

I'm dealing with this issue right now...I've recently begun chatting with someone via the net and within the first week and a half I caught him in 2 different lies

...it lends itself so easily to lying.

That's why I am categorically stating now that I AM NOT SEAN CONNERY!

 

[p_p_man]

or James Bond...

 

[*bratcat*]

Re: we have

 

[Siren]

ok, who deceived my Lavy?

 

[lavender]

 

[morninggirl5]

I'm guessing you're feeling deceived once again.

It's amazing how some people are so self-centered that they use the most tragic of times to gain the attention they crave.

 

[april-wine]

remember lavender, those same people who have deceived may have been deceived themselves....people protect their hearts in different ways....unfortunately, playing that game you may end up hurting someone who really cares....double edged sword i guess....

all you can do is be as honest as safety allows....and go from there....

 

[Angel]

What's wrong Lavykins?

 

[lavender]

 

[morninggirl5]

Actually morninggirl, I'm not being deceived. But I've watched my friends being deceived. I'm not trying to gain attention. I'm sorry you feel that way.

I wasn't saying you were trying to gain attention. I was referring to those who have been using tragedy in deceptive ways to gain attention.

 

[beckbabe]

I'm confused. What brought this back?

 

[naudiz]

People who intentionally deceive, especially to make their lives seem more interesting or significant, are pretty pathetic. I mean, my life isn't one dashing tale of adventure after another, but I'd like to think it's interesting enough I don't have to invent a different, better version. Besides, that careless regard for others' feelings will come back and bite you, sooner if not later.

How I cope with betrayal is pretty simple. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Everyone gets one shot. Honest mistakes notwithstanding, if you blow it, you blow it. I may not treat you like something I peeled off the bottom of my shoe, but I will take everything you say with a big grain of salt, and the line, "I won't ever lie again," will simply be grounds for peals of giddy laughter at your expense.

To quote Ani Difranco:

They say that alcoholics are always alcoholics
Even when they're dry as my lips for years,
Even if they're stranded on a small desert island
With no place in two thousand miles to buy beer.
And I wonder, is he different? Is he different?
Has he changed what he's about?
Or is he just the liar with nothing to lie about?

p_p_man: Great. Now I'm going to be thinking of older men with British accents all night. *whine*

 

[Debbie]

I believe honesty is the best policy. It is sad to find out that people portray themselves to be something they are not. But people also don't want to see sometimes they are being deceived preferring to accept the illusion of reality, I am who I portray myself to be on the web. Warm, caring and helpful. I trust too easily and am deeply hurt when people misrepresent themselves and I fall for it.

Quote
"A person's mystery on the net lies in the imagery of a nonexistent illusion or perception of their physical likeness, one that is formed in your mind but sight unseen"
By Debbiexxx

I am who I say I am, unless I state otherwise.

 

[beckbabe]

Geez the guilt factor people. I'm confessing! A lie of omission. I have crooked teeth. You really can't see it right in pictures. There, now I feel better.