Dawn's Anal Awakening Saga

[kinkbugs]

Hello, I'm Kay.

I'm a tired university student who started out writing fanfic and semi-serious stuff, but am now too tired and anxious to write plot and want to live vicariously through the characters in my stories.

So yes. I'm writing utter porn with little to no plot, that focuses wholly on people getting sucked and fucked in numerous ways.

Follow the sexual escapades of 18 year old Dawn Simmons who discovers and nurtures her inner anal-slut. With the help of her older neighbour Eric Sherburn, and her college roommate Kennedy Harper, Dawn sucks and fucks her way to complete anal submission.

You can find all the parts here:
Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7​

[Excerpt 1]

Dawn looked out of the window at the bright sunny sky. It was a beautiful day. Maybe she should go for a jog? Or she could catch the bus and go to the mall?

Her eyes slid down to the neighbour's yard and she choked on thin air.

There, in the backyard, was her neighbour Eric Sherburn, his basketball shorts around his knees, eyes closed behind his sunglasses, his hand moving up and down his large cock as he enjoyed the sun.

Dawn couldn't help herself, leaning out the window to get a better look.

[Excerpt 2]

Eric lined up his cock and slid it slowly into Dawn's pussy. Her mouth parted and she exhaled softly with a moan. Eric ground his cock into her repeatedly, gently fucking her cunt and using her juices to lube up his cock. When he felt his cock was sufficiently lubricated with her pussy cream, Eric pulled his dick out of Dawn's cunt, then slid it all the way to the hilt into her cute little derriere.

Dawn moaned softly, her hands still massaging her tits. Eric bent his head down to suck on her nipples while his hips never stopped their incessant invasion of her tight anus. He reached down to toy with her pussy and clit, teasing her G-spot and love nub in the way only he knew how, but Dawn pulled his hand away.

"Make love to my asshole, Eric," she panted "Make sweet anal love to my hole, make me cum from anal love-making like you made me cum that first time!"

(I deliberately kept Dawn's description a little more vague so you could imagine your fave blonde in her place but it appears that's not for everyone)

I'm quite shy in the sense that I never know what to say to comments, but I still love reading them and they give me life. However, it seems that my stories aren't getting many comments even though they're highly rated. Is this a thing? Am I doing something wrong? I'm not entirely sure if I'm committing some kind of faux pas or not, but I would love it if people commented to tell me what they liked, or what concerns them, or even telling me they got off reading it.

Um so, I'm here, in the forums, hoping for advice on

1. How to improve the series in terms of ideas and/or writing style
2. How to get more comments on future installments
3. If I should compile and release the whole thing as a free ebook
​

 

[Salacious_Scribe]

Welcome to the dark side...

 

[kinkbugs]

Welcome to the dark side...

This is my happy place shhhhhhhh

 

[Salacious_Scribe]

This is my happy place shhhhhhhh

hey I never said the dar side was bad. After all we have orgasms....

 

[yukonnights]

kinkbugs, I read one of your standalone stories, Eleanor the Cougar, just to get a feel for what you're doing.

Comments are one of the more elusive donations we who publish here receive. I just took a look at my most recent story and the stats are; 6.9k hits, 18 favorite story, 4.74 rating with 127 vote — and 8 comments.

(Eleanor the Cougar; 28.2k hits, 15 favorite story, 4.57 rating — 1 comment.)

In my time here, I've noticed that comments do seem to grow in number when the story is of the type that readers get invested in. It can be a one-shot standalone or a series but the characters tend to be well developed, the storyline tends to be more complex and not built around the erotic content, but the erotic content enhances the overall story. Also, the number of comments can also be a factor of the story Category (audience).

In the situation of a more lighthearted story the comments too become less informative or in-depth. There's just not as much to comment on.

Thus, the main thing is to write what makes you happy. If reader feedback is important to that goal, you can solicit is at the end of the story (don't expect a huge uptick in comments). You could change to a more in-depth story (but is that worth it?).

Probably, you shouldn't worry too much about the comments unless they are a main focus for why your writing (feedback to help you improve, etc.)

My comment on Eleanor the Cougar; Well crafted and edited. Fun to read.

 

[Salacious_Scribe]

I had stories posted under other usernames, and deleted those accounts to consolidate everything under a single name. I am editing and reworking some of the stories.

My highest ever comments on one story was 168 over 18 months. It was a father-daughter incest story.

It is about to be resubmitted, I just had a VE go over it, and once I review the suggestions, I will submit it again.

 

[ElectricBlue]

I'm quite shy in the sense that I never know what to say to comments, but I still love reading them and they give me life. However, it seems that my stories aren't getting many comments even though they're highly rated. Is this a thing? Am I doing something wrong? I'm not entirely sure if I'm committing some kind of faux pas or not, but I would love it if people commented to tell me what they liked, or what concerns them, or even telling me they got off reading it.

If you get one comment per thousand views you're doing okay.

Why bother with a free e-book? You're going to get far more views here on Lit than you'll ever get with an e-book. Just write more stories if you want to get followers.

Write exceptionally well and/or write outside the norm and you'll get more comments.

If you're in the middle of the bell curve of writers, neither exceptionally good nor diabolically bad, on the whole you'll not get much feedback at all. Literotica, generally speaking, is light on when it comes to tangible feedback.

 

[kinkbugs]

If you get one comment per thousand views you're doing okay.

Why bother with a free e-book? You're going to get far more views here on Lit than you'll ever get with an e-book. Just write more stories if you want to get followers.

Write exceptionally well and/or write outside the norm and you'll get more comments.

If you're in the middle of the bell curve of writers, neither exceptionally good nor diabolically bad, on the whole you'll not get much feedback at all. Literotica, generally speaking, is light on when it comes to tangible feedback.

One comment per thousand views...... *looks at views* mmmmmmm I guess I have to step up my game.

For the ebook... I sometimes browse Literotica on my phone and it's a little tedious to go next page, next page, etc. An ebook would be properly formatted, and also... not restricted by vpn. I had to get a VPN to get on here (and a host of other sites that have been govern-banned).

Also maybe it's just me but I like to keep stuff I like on my phone with me >.> I have some really hot fanfic smut downloaded and I don't read it all the time, but it's nice to know it's there

 

[ElectricBlue]

One comment per thousand views...... *looks at views* mmmmmmm I guess I have to step up my game.

For the ebook... I sometimes browse Literotica on my phone and it's a little tedious to go next page, next page, etc. An ebook would be properly formatted, and also... not restricted by vpn. I had to get a VPN to get on here (and a host of other sites that have been govern-banned).

Also maybe it's just me but I like to keep stuff I like on my phone with me >.> I have some really hot fanfic smut downloaded and I don't read it all the time, but it's nice to know it's there

Fair enough - but that's you. Doing the extra formatting work for an e-book is tedious and time consuming, so you'd want to be sure other readers wanted your content that way, before spending time on it. I've done it for some of my content, but there's only a tiny demand - mind you, you're proposing giving it away, so your supply and demand equations are different to mine.

 

[lovecraft68]

One comment per thousand views...... *looks at views* mmmmmmm I guess I have to step up my game.

For the ebook... I sometimes browse Literotica on my phone and it's a little tedious to go next page, next page, etc. An ebook would be properly formatted, and also... not restricted by vpn. I had to get a VPN to get on here (and a host of other sites that have been govern-banned).

Also maybe it's just me but I like to keep stuff I like on my phone with me >.> I have some really hot fanfic smut downloaded and I don't read it all the time, but it's nice to know it's there

Its not about stepping up your game as much as the Anal category does not get a lot of traffic, in fact when its occasionally discussed about adding or consolidating categories, Anal is often brought up as one that could be done away with.

Also you're writing an ongoing series.

The way they work is #1 will get the most numbers, but as you progress you will get less and less, and readers not that interested will fall off.

The good thing is though that the readers remaining will tend to always vote high because they like the series.

Last...don't get too caught up in the numbers. I know its hard, especially when you're fairly new, but the most important thing is to write what you want and be happy with it.