Cup size is not an adjective.

MlledeLaPlumeBleu

Literotica Guru
Joined
Jun 9, 2003
Posts
779
I know this has probably been mentioned umpteen times but- I was just writing it to someone in a PM. Pet peeve, I guess. I mean, aside from not being any kind of measurement with a mental/visual correlary, it says nothing about nipples or heft or density or color of texture- why, they could be those fluffy pendulous marshmallow tits, or wandering areolas...
My new band name.

mlle
 
Mlle: no, I'm not stalking you (much). Yes, its' been discussed at length but as another thread on 'show or tell' attempts to 'show', your post does it exquisitelyl.

If that simply luscious prose just comes out like honey dripping from a full comb in a summer's heat, then please post more often.

con brio, Perdita :rose:
 
It's like buying a drink:

There is Regular, Large, Extra Large, Giant, Slushy, and Big Gulp! :rolleyes:
 
Quasimodem said:
It's like buying a drink:

There is Regular, Large, Extra Large, Giant, Slushy, and Big Gulp! :rolleyes:

ROFLMAO...stop! it hurts to much to laufgh so hard early on a Monday.

Your terms are so much better than mere digits and Alphabet symbols.


Many a good story has been ruined for me by the writer not being creative about breast size.

I always figure the measurements are only relevant to the bra sizer, which I'm not. Although...it might make a fun job...or an interesting story. :D
 
deliciously_naughty said:
What about champagne glass?

or shot glass?:rolleyes:

I'll volunteer to lick the salt AND the tequila off:D
 
Nasty party games. Pick a random story. List the adjectives.

I went to Group Sex and got a one-pager. Here are all the adjectives in it:

disappointed, alone, hottest, excited, first, first, white, 36C, short, hard, ready, crazy, hard, free, hard, small, 9in, hard, fat, 8.5in, little, other, 8 inch, sweet, shear, rested, hard, last, good.

And that's a perfect precis of it.
 
you could always go to the "fruit" comparison:

Her knockers were as big as watermelons, dangling heavily from her tortured body.
 
Rainbow Skin said:
. . . I went to Group Sex and got a one-pager. Here are all the adjectives in it: "disappointed, alone, hottest, excited, first, first, white, 36C, short, hard, ready, crazy, hard, free, hard, small, 9in, hard, fat, 8.5in, little, other, 8 inch, sweet, shear, rested, hard, last, good."

And that's a perfect precis of it.

I admit to having difficulty writing truly errotic stories, so I am not above using someone else's structure.

Threrefor:

"Short Efficiency"


Disappointed and alone on the hottest day of the summer, still I was excited the first time I knocked, first with my hand, then with my shlong, on the door to apartment 36C.

A short man gave me a hard look, that made him appear to be ready and crazy enough to hit me hard with his free hand, while maintaining a hard grasp on a small woman’s breast.

With 9in1 oil he savagely lubricated the lock. Meanwhile, I was hard pressed to think of any use for more than 8.5in1of his lubricant's ingredients.

Little did he care, other than sliding the 8 inch dead bold back and forth, with sweet efficiency. A pose that proved enough to shear the protuberance in my pants down to its rested size.

That hard on was the last good one that I have ever had.

I blame that short efficient man with his 9in1 oil for all my problems.
 
Isn't it nice when the standard laundry-list is duly provided i.e. blond, 18, long legs, tank top, shorts?

Oh, and then there's the spontaneously enjoyable first-time anal sex!

"He slamed his man-bat up my ass, and I was like "Ow ow ow" and it rilly hurt, but then it didn't and I was all like "uhhh" and "I'm cummmmming" and I totaly loved having my virgin ass plowed by a real man like
daddy/uncle/Coach Johnson/Tarzan/Trucker Bob/my middle-aged neighbor/Walt Whitman/that creepy guy I met at the mall!!!!!!!!

and now I'm his litle fuck-slut pussy-kitten and I'll never go back to high-school boys again!!! Cause everybody knows they don't know how to fuck- only 'older' guys do- like Daddy/uncle/Coach Johnson/Tarzan/Don Quixote/Trucker Bob/Al Bundy/Don Alfonso/Boxcar Willie!!!

And anyway, high school boys never do it in the butt!!! And that's my favorite way to fuk now- it rilly rilly is!"


yeah...Southern renaissance, look out...
 
Mlle and Quas:

you two win my blue/bleu literary wit ribbons for today (and it's not yet noon).

Perdita :rose: :rose: *


*well, roses will do; no ribbon smilie.
 
M & Q,

I'm at work and was trying to keep from bursting into laughter, but did it anyway.

good show...

lol

BS
 
I think Mlle can expect a call from the Durtgrl group. She's violating their copyright.:D
 
Svenskaflicka said:
I'm a size "T" when it comes to breasts. T as in T-shirt.:(

i don't understand? each breast is like a t-shirt?
 
hiya

yea i see what you mean mlle honey, i mean you wouldn't write a resume for a new job application like that would you.

hi i'm lorri; i got a pair of 38c cup's with nipples like truck wheel nuts.

i got a lovely flat firm stomach leading down to a huge protruding belly mound with a bush of pube's that look like the rainforest on a sunny day.

as you part my rainforest and gently ease my massive twat lips apart you will reveal a huge soaking wet man cream filled orifice that looks for all the world like a freshly filled wallpaper hangers bucket.

oh and by the way i always shag the boss.

lorri
 
LorriLove: I'd like to see you and Quas collaborate on a story, or a really good personals ad.

I love your style, Lady; couldn't write like you or Q or Mlle to save my life.

hug, Perdita
 
Chicklet said:
i don't understand? each breast is like a t-shirt?

T-shirts are flat, Chicklet...:(

OK, maybe I exaggerate. I've got a B-cup. But to me, it seems like every freakin teenager has got twice the breast size I have.
 
Flicka, stop thinking about that. You know 100 times more what to do with what you've got than any teen.

Don't think size, age, etc. Think, "I am such a goddess."

coach Perdita
 
MlledeLaPlumeBleu said:
Oh, and then there's the spontaneously enjoyable first-time anal sex!

"He slamed his man-bat up my ass, and I was like "Ow ow ow" and it rilly hurt, but then it didn't and I was all like "uhhh" and "I'm cummmmming" and I totaly loved having my virgin ass plowed

This "How to..." was pointed out in another thread some while ago. It is completely and usefully instructive and anyone thinking of writing a detailed anal sex scene should definitely read it. Quite gruesome if it's not your 'style'. It's by sweetsubsarahh and this is where it is. .

Enjoy.

Gauche
 
Speaking of sex education for young people, as is going on in another thread, I am grateful for the sex education for older/mature/senior/midlife/etc. persons too (especially those who have teenagers still clawing to get out and run rampant).

MG's pussy shaving piece is great; I will now read the above noted by Gauche.

A Persian friend once told me how she was educated in anal by a Persian/Frenchman. I could not believe we were talking about anything similar to the boring experiences I had up to then known.

Always looking to educate myself in anything I need or require; Lit. has been a treasure chest in that respect.

Perdita
 
Copyright?!

If they held the copyright on bad erotic writing, they'd be rich indeed....


You know...while I'm here I feel like I need to say- I also really hate the word "boobies."

Sometimes, you'll be getting carnally amiable with a (presumably) sexy guy, and then he goes and whips out that word- and suddenly, you're not sure whether to fuck him or suckle him, and powder his ass...


Lorri dearest- *laugh* Holy shit. Truck wheel nuts...oh my god. I'm so *hot* right now!!!
 
'morning,all. BS, you're a cutie (though you need not feel the need to prove it).

Mlle, I loved the nuts image too, and the wallpaper hanger's bucket (yum yum, Lorr). Yeah, gurrl, I too protest boobies. I like 'tits', right up front. Amazing how one word or line can sometimes end a scene (even a marriage, haha), and the hombre never even has a clue.

Lorr and Mlle,

:kiss:'s from carnally amiable Perdita
 
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