Crying out for it.

[Quoll]

I was going to get some info on the cathartic effects of crying, but apparently the jury is still out on that and I don`t really want to wait another ten years or so for the results.

Is crying cathartic for you?

Is there good crying and bad crying?

Can you cry?

Should you cry?

What makes you cry?

How do you feel after you have cried?

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?

 

[Seduce]

I cry only when I am really angry at someone, and it feels miserable.
I dont like crying.

 

[bisexplicit]

I hate crying, but I am a pretty frequent crier. Mostly, I find it embarassing. However, usually after crying things end up feeling better...although mid-cry things usually feel pretty damn bad.
Usually I cry over things involving people...someone is upset with me, I'm upset with someone else, etc. Although, I do also cry because of stupid things I make up in my head.

Yeah, okay, add that to the things-you-wanted-to-know-about-bisexplicit book.

 

[DelicateFlower]

It seems that I cry at the drop of a hat.

It happens when I'm reading a book, watching a movie (especially Steel Magnolias) or even when listening to some songs.

My father has been seriously ill for the last 5 years and everytime he has a doctor appointment whether it's good or bad news I cry.

It's strange because I HATE to cry, but it's very cathartic.


DF

 

[rcuhljr]

Not as often as I should, but I think it is helpful, usually by the end all the emotion associated with the original issue is drained and you feel a lot calmer about the subject. It just seems like a good way to vent a lot of pent up emotions.

 

[MarchOfTheWee]

I didn't cry when my son was born. I didn't cry when I lost my grandmother.
I didn't cry on 9/11, even witnessing it in person working on the Brooklyn waterfront.

But show me a replay of the 1986 World Series on ESPN Classic and I'll bawl like an infant.

I have NO clue what it is but anytime I watch old sports tape I cry

 

[Eilan]

Is crying cathartic for you?Yet, it can be.

Is there good crying and bad crying?I believe so, but I'm not sure I can explain why.

Can you cry?Certainly.

Should you cry?Yes. Crying can be a good tension reliever.

What makes you cry?I don't tend to cry when I'm really happy, but I cried almost uncontrollably when my kids were born. I cry when I'm sad, like when my grandfather died. I cry when I'm under way too much stress; it doesn't happen very often, but I always feel better when it does. I also cry when I'm really angry.

Occasionally I'll cry because I'm in pain, but it depends on the pain. If it's a headache, then no. However, if I somehow manage to rip half my big toenail off when I'm vacuuming (which I did a couple of years ago), then I will most definitely cry!

How do you feel after you have cried?It seems to depend on why I've been crying. If it's a response to stress, then I tend to feel physically drained afterward.

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?See previous question.

**Edited to mention that I also cried when my oldest daughter started kindergarten. I have another one starting kindergarten this fall. We'll see what happens then.

 

[EJFan]

i think crying can be cathartic... anything that's an emotional upwelling can be.

personally, i haven't cried since 1983... that was when my grandfather died and he was the first close relative i lost; it was my first exposure to death really.

i can't really answer the other questions because i keep my emotions inside a lot. it's not healthy though... it just makes it that much more volatile when the come out. to that end, i think crying (or any other emotional expression) should be a regular activity. as long as it's appropriate for for the situation, i say let 'er go.

 

[Ricwilly]

I'm in favor of crying, it's one of the reasons we have tear ducts. It's also a healthy outlet for emotions that if kept inside may result in climbing a tower with a high powered rifle.

 

[AppleBiter]

I'm a highly emotional person, so I cry quite a bit. Crying sucks. It clogs up my sinuses and usually gives me a raging headache. Sometimes, I guess it's good to get out all that you're feeling. Other times, it's just an annoying part of life.

 

[Munachi]

i feel the urge to cry quite often, particularly whenever i see/read/hear some really cheesy stuff, like some silly tv commercials... as for real crying, it has been a while, i think i do that mainly of anger... but yes, i think it can help... sometimes i feel a strong wish to cry just to release stress - there have been times when i deliberately watches sad movies i knew will make me cry, because i felt better afterwards, but was unable to cry for the reasons tht really stressed me...

 

[SlyKitten]

I can count on one hand the number of times I cried.

I cried when I failed a history test in high school.
I cried for days when I split up with my first boyfriend.
I cried for weeks when a passionate lover of mine left the country.
I cried for hours when I saw Bridges of Madison County.
I cried when I almost lost someone close to me.

I guess I cried too when I was a child, but I don't remember.

I don't like crying. Feels awful when the tears come up, when my chest is so crushed I wish I'd just die instead of suffering this, and when every spasm and whine hurts like... well I can't compare the pain to anything else but it hurts.

I feel liberated once I'm done crying though.

 

[Quoll]

Is crying cathartic for you?

For me, most times yes, mainly because by the time I actually cry, things have built up so much that there is nowhere else to go.





Is there good crying and bad crying?

Definitely, when my kids were born I bawled my eyes out, at first I thought it was because the birth of our first child was fairly traumatic (well for me anyway) involving ambulance trips and hospital transfers being, separated from my wife, overactive imagination ( I know, I found that surprising too) and nearly missing the whole damn thing.
When number two came along, things were a lot calmer and under control but I stilled bawled anyway. There have only been one or two other occasions when I have felt so relieved and happy. Ironically my wife, who can cry at the drop of a hat, never once shed a tear, she just sat there with that smug satisfied look on her face.

Can you cry?

Yeah but it`s not easy.


Should you cry?

I think you should, it doesn`t seem to do a lot of good holding it in.


What makes you cry?

When my parents died I cried, but after that I shut down that part of me for many years, I guess I never found anything comparable to that pain or sorrow. Even at my worst the most I could manage was a few dry sobs, but somewhere along the way it all built up inside and was looking for a way out.
Apart from the occasions I mentioned above the only time I really cry is in my sleep or that twilight area between sleep and waking, I guess my defences are down enough to let it out, but it doesn`t happen all that often.



How do you feel after you have cried?

Empty, relaxed, very tired and generally at peace

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?

Generally not.

 

[Guest]

Is crying cathartic for you? Sometimes

Is there good crying and bad crying? I can take this many ways. But I'll just say that crying is normal, and if held inside for too long could develop into much worse things.

Can you cry?Absolutely!

Should you cry? Absolutely!

What makes you cry?I'll keep that in my diary.

How do you feel ater you have cried? My head and my eyes hurt. Argh! Seriously though- I'd rather fix the problem (what made me cry) so it doesn't happen again.

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after? If I'm understanding this question correctly, I would say no until I can stop what is happening, I'll just cry again.

 

[His_pita]

I think crying can be very cathartic. I am not a huge crier. More like the eyes almost spilling over with tears kind of girl. I am moved very much by my emotions and will cry when angry, upset or feeling mushy.

I don't much like going on major crying jags because my eyes will swell almost shut and last forever. But often feel better once I do.

My Dom told me last night he wants to make me cry so he can kiss away the tears. Now, that is a reason to get the waterworks flowing.

 

[SweetErika]

Is crying cathartic for you? Yes. I don't like cry, but most of the time I believe it's healthy and good for me.

Is there good crying and bad crying?
While I think it all can be good, I tend to deem crying in public, especially out of frustration, bad. Actually, I don't like crying in front of people I care about either because it MIGHT upset them. However, as hard as I try, I'm usually unsuccessful at keeping back the tears, so I just make an effort to calm down and pull myself together. Oddly enough, I've never judged others crying as bad (as long as it's not for something patently stupid like trying to get their way or attention), and that doesn't bother me at all. Good old double standards.

Should you cry?
Yes, you should if it's helpful for you. For me, bottling up such strong emotions leads to far worse things, so crying is an attractive alternative.

What makes you cry?
-Extreme physical or emotional pain and pleasure
-When someone I care about is hurting
-Frustration at myself or something big (an accident, losing something important, the insensitivity of others)
-Feeling really overwhelmed
-Really thinking about or losing someone I love
-Failure (perceived or real)
-Sometimes it's a spontaneous reaction to certain things during sex

Basically, just about anything.

How do you feel ater you have cried?
I usually feel better, more in control and capable of handling things, and exhausted.

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?
Yes, I suppose how 'valid' I feel the reason I've cried is does make a difference in how I feel after. Yet I can usually rationalize negative feelings away by calling it "a necessary and healthy release of emotion" when I don't see the reason as very valid.

 

[cymbline]

Is crying cathartic for you?
I have only recently allowed myself to cry. And I do find it cathartic.

Is there good crying and bad crying?
Good question. This is very hard for me to answer as I keep thinking about the physical aspect of crying. But, I think the emotions behind the reason for crying that determines if it is good or bad. A good cry would be something joyous and a bad would be a tragic event.


Can you cry?
Yes, I will now allow myself to cry.

Should you cry?
Yes. Crying releases endorphin into the system.

What makes you cry?
Many years ago it was the death of my mother and the passing of my dog. Now I will cry with any feeling that comes over me. Kind words from a friend or unwanted memories.

How do you feel after you have cried?
With the bad cry–emotional drained, my head and muscles ache. I have a stomachache. My eyes burn and I am thirsty. There is a sense of relief, as if I have gotten something out of my system. After a good cry I feel good, happy, and loved. I feel at peace.

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?
Yes, very much so.

 

[pleasteasme]

Is crying cathartic for you?
It can be but, not always is. For me, it depends upon the reason for the outlet of tears.

Is there good crying and bad crying?
Crying is natural, it is a good thing.


Can you cry?
I can but, rarely do.


Should you cry?
I should but I tend to hold in my emotions. In life, I have found it advantageous to hide my feelings. I'm working on it......to be better about just "being" and not worrying so much about what other people think.


What makes you cry?
The last time I had a real big cry was when a very dear teacher & friend of mine was killed unexpectedly.....I bawled like a baby at his memorial service. I held it in until they played the Alan Jackson song "Remember When"....I totally lost it, which created a chain reaction and then my brother and nephew started crying. I guess I am the "strong one" in my family. (no pressure, huh?)

I admit tearing up and weeping when visiting with people (on the phone or the internet), if they tell me something unjust that has happend to them, their friends or their family. I cry because of the unfairness of the world sometimes.

Mostly I cry due to anger and frustration!!


How do you feel after you have cried?

Depending on the "why" of the crying.....it can be draining or just dehydrating.

Other times I cry, it makes me feel weak, drained, and a real raging headache. *ouch!*


Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?

In the case of my former teacher, no. He is still gone and the tears did not help.

In the case of my own anger it does sometimes help and give me a little bit of an outlet for my feelings.

 

[Eilan]

My husband and I ate at a steakhouse this evening (with just the toddlers--the older two are spending the night with great-grandma), and we got to listen to quite a bit of country music. A couple of the songs made me want to cry. In fact, my eyes got a little teary (and I think my husband's did, too).

I don't know the title/artist of the songs because I normally don't listen to country music, but the songs definitely evoked some emotion in both of us.

 

[babydoll2u]

Is crying cathartic for you?
Yes. I don't like to cry, but I generally let things build up to such a boiling point inside, that by the time I break, I really REALLY need the release.

Is there good crying and bad crying?
oh Lord I hate crying in public. In fact I hate crying where/when anyone can see or hear me. Not only is it embarrassing for me, but I'm afraid that the people I'm around may be upset, either at or for me. So I try hard to hold back the tears and cry alone, in private.. but alot of times that leads me to the first question

Should you cry?
Yes, God gave us tear ducts for this reason. We need the emotional release from stress and tension.

What makes you cry?
Oh wow... let's see... deep emotional pain or pleasure, bouts of depression, frustration with myself, feeling really overwhelmed, when someone I care about is hurting.. or worse yet, when I hurt someone I care about; when I think I've failed (whether I really have or not), when I lose or push away a friend; when I feel like I'm being ignored and/or overlooked (makes me feel worthless)... and then there are the times when I just burst out crying for no known reason!

How do you feel later you have cried?
Depending upon the situation that made me cry, I usually feel better... but sometimes, not.

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after?
absolutely...

 

[MR.GGG]

I'm M 50+, lost a lover I'd been with for 21 years a few years ago now. The waves of grief would wash up like a fucking tidal wave somedays. If / when I cried the feeling afterwards, in a weird way, was almost the feeling of relief you get when you've been feeling sick and you finally throw up. There were times when I felt so bad it actually stunned me later that I could feel like a little kid again - THAT kind of "just lose it" release. Over time it diminished and retreated until now it almost never hits. I have a new life and a new wife now and it's a crying shame that US immigration takes so long to decide if I'm a danger or not so I can go join the new wife.

Is crying cathartic for you? Yes it can be - very. See above. Although I hate crying and do NOT think it is very "manly" I had to accept that crying and the pain associated with it truly defined my relationship with the one I lost. If I could go back and do it all again and had the choice of not crying and not feeling that degree of loss I would take a pass. It IS how I felt about losing her and whitewashing those feelings I think would be an assault on the soul.

Is there good crying and bad crying? Yes. Frustration would be bad kind and release would be good one.

Can you cry? Absolutely

Should you cry? Absolutely. I don't mean adults wailing through a mall or something because their tax refund wasn't as big as they thought they deserved but if your emotions neeed that release then I think it can be EXTREMELY UNhealthy to hold it in and act the tuff guy (MorF) - stiff upper lip and all that. It is a good idea to do it in private though or the men in the white coats are liabe to come lookin for ya.

What makes you cry? See above. It probably sounds goofy but you may be familiar with my TRY THIS AND REPORT BACK thread. I have received hundreds of notes from people who've tried this, found that it worked for them and write to let me know that "she has never cum before in her LIFE and because of your thread she's cuming all the time now." THOSE notes are like gold to me. A few have been from couples in their 70's and even 80's and thought their sex life was dead and all of a sudden they are acting like teenagers again. A few have mentioned debilitating condtions that restricted regular sex and after they discovered the TECHNIQUE worked for them they are back having a great sex life again. Like I said ... it may sound goofy but I've been moved close to tears reading some of those notes. I get a sense of overwhelming happiness that my advice has worked so well for some couple and there have been times when I had tears well up reading some of those notes. Happiness tears and I think that is cool.

How do you feel after you have cried? Usually relief as described above.

Does the reason you cried make a difference to how you feel after? I think some situations stem from our youth and although tears were not appropriate at the time the need for release follows us into our adult years. Some of these feelings can be exteremely intense. It is up to our imaginations as to whether we can "enjoy" that kind of release now. It is completely dependant on your lover/mate/spouse for the trust that allows that degree of emotional release but it can happen. There can be a huge sense of relief in things like that. On the other hand if crying signifes weakness or immaturity to one person in a relationship then you're exposing the other to feelings that are destructive and embarrassing.

ANY crying, for any reasons that are SHARED by a couple, have to be instigated and shared with extreme trust and understanding otherwise an emotional cleansing can turn into a very bitter memory.

My 2¢

 

[Quoll]

.........My 2¢

Worth a hell of a lot more than that, beautiful post Mr G.

 

[Crimsonblue]

hi quoll

9s thread

 

[Quoll]

hi quoll

9s thread

"s"
such
sweetness

"t"
truly
thankful

 

[Crimsonblue]

morning bump

"s"
such
sweetness

"t"
truly
thankful

how sweet of you