Crossing the Fantasy/Reality line

[Amazed14]

Hello, everyone. I've been reading for a while, but this is my first post and I would like to get some opinions.

When I first met my wife, she tols me that she had been with women quite often as well as many men. I admitted that I had been with men in the past, but downplayed it as a few isolated incidents, or that I was drunk, etc. Truth is that I had a 10 year period of secret assfucking and cocksucking that lasted well into my first marriage.

Anyway, our sex life is fantastic. In fact, she is 10 years younger than me and sometimes has to keep going with her fingers or a toy after I am spent. Usually, I'll watch and be ready again and some point.

We've never talked about the gay stuff, but lately it's been coming up in the bedroom. I'll tell her to "suck that pussy," while she's eating my ass, or I'll have her lick her juices off my fingers and cock and have her tell me how much she loves pussy. She also has me suck her strap on and tells me what a little whore I am, asking me if I like that cock, etc. She then fucks my ass silly with it.

We have other bedroom scenarios, but this one has been escalating. I was just wondering if, at some point, the natural progression is to get other people to join in and take this to the next level. Or, if at that point, it spoils the fantasy.

Any feedback would be great.

 

[hoodooman]

yes

yes it does mean that you will be sucking cock while she directs and masturbates herself.....you'll do lots more too...just you wait and see

 

[george51]

That's a hard one, but the post above makes it sound interesting. All that direction stuff...

 

[human_male]

I'd hate to see you do anything to jeopardise what sounds like an incredible relationship. Seriously, you are one lucky guy. I'm not saying don't do it, but be careful.

And better to bring her into it than carry on behind her back in my opinion. Not judging. Just saying.

 

[SweetErika]

It may or may not ever go to reality. Many are perfectly happy with the safety of the fantasy.

Have you asked her if she'd like to be with women again? I'd think that'd likely lead to her asking if you'd like to be with men. And if either of you wants to take it to reality, you'll certainly have a lot to talk about in terms of your relationship, safety, jealousy, rules, how you want to work it, etc.

If you're comfortable being on your own, I'd leave it open as to whether you play together or separately (or both, of course). Some people are just more comfy one-on-one, whereas other couples need to play together.

You'll never know if you don't start talking about it, and, like HM said, being open is a hell of a lot better than keeping secrets and potentially cheating! It's a risk, but in our experience, it's also very rewarding to know we have the option of exploring with other people we really like. Having the option pretty much takes the wind out of the cheating sail, too.

 

[brightondream]

I would have to go along with Human Male. You got a good thing here; what most can only hope to have. Don't take the chance of ruining it. On the other hand............if you do make the leap from fantasy to reality...
give me a call !!

 

[nitoc88]

I know what you mean, I have this fantasy of sucking a cock with a woman watching and directing. If you were to tell me that I could do that with you guys I think I would jump at the chance. You need to talk to her for real though and find where this is going, it sounds like she is into it.

 

[bi golly]

When I first met my wife, she tols me that she had been with women quite often as well as many men. I admitted that I had been with men in the past, but downplayed it as a few isolated incidents, or that I was drunk, etc. Truth is that I had a 10 year period of secret assfucking and cocksucking that lasted well into my first marriage.

Your wife has already figured out that it wasn't just a few isolated incidents. If you have lied to your current wife about cheating on your first wife, you need to deal with that. Your wife may be okay with your trying to cover your tracks because men are not supposed to like getting fucked in the ass, but when you keep secrets from each other and reinforce the lies, only trouble can result.

With regard to bringing other people into the sex games, that is harder. There is swinging and there is open marriage. There are a lot of vocal people on Lit who engage, have engaged, support, don't support all or none of any modification of the rules.

As a practical matter, depending on where you live, it may be really hard to find a couple who will join you in play. You may find singles who want to romp, but this is a minefield and a single misstep can blow your balls off.

First things first. Make sure your marriage is rock solid. Recognize that there are certain things that you want to reserve for your wife, your own personal emotional selves. In the past, you probably equated sexual intimacy with all other forms of intimacy and when you shared one, you shared the all. You are entering territory where you need to start distinguishing which intimacies you will share and with whom.