Cowboys to the rescue

[*bratcat*]

 

[Stonedagger]

looks at the 'brat' thinking

hummm I wonder if she would let me do that to her????

Thanks for the joke it is pretty funny!!

 

[Samuari]

My Heros have always been cowboys! Hey thanks you brightened a day that was threatening to become a political swamp.

 

[*bratcat*]

I hate swamps!!

 

[Texan]

if you don't get it..... I guess you had to be there

A Texan died and ascended in to Heaven. St. Peter met him and
welcomed him saying "you will certainly enjoy Paradise."

The Texan shook his head sadly and said "I always thought that TEXAS
was Paradise."

St. Peter said "Well, let me show you what we have to offer." He took
the Texan to an area that had a beautiful river flowing through it with
wildlife and flowers everywhere. "Isn't this beautiful?" said St.
Peter.

The Texan replied, "Yes, but not as pretty as the area around SAN
ANTONIO."

Somewhat ruffled, St. Peter took him to another area where there were
rolling hills, whitetail deer and bluebonnets and Indian Paintbrush
everywhere.
"Now" said St. Peter "Have you ever seen anything so wonderful?"

The Texan paused and said "Yes, it is beautiful but it does not hold a
candle to the TEXAS HILL COUNTRY in the springtime."

Becoming more upset, St. Peter then took the Texan to a beautiful white
beach, with gentle waves, and an azure sky. "Now have you seen anything
this beautiful in Texas" said St. Peter.

The Texan smiled and said "I guess you've never been to SOUTH PADRE
ISLAND".

At this point, St. Peter took the Texan to a large rock. On the side of
the
rock was a huge iron door. St. Peter opened the door and they stepped
into an elevator and started going down. As they descended, it grew
more and more hot. When the elevator door open, it revealed the fires
of
damnation-Hell. St. Peter said "Now, have you got anything in Texas
that
can top that?"

The Texan thought a moment and shook his head. "No, but I know a
couple of old boys from HOUSTON that can put that thing out for you."

 

[plasticman33]

Impudently funny!

 

[Texan]

everything's bigger

Texas Pride

A Texan buys a round of drinks for all in the bar because, he announces his wife has just
produced "a typical Texas baby boy weighing 20 pounds."

Congratulations shower him from all around, and many exclamations of "Wow!" are heard.

A woman faints due to sympathy pains. Two weeks later, he returns to the bar. The bartender says, "Say, you're the father of the typical Texas baby that weighed 20 pounds at birth.

How much does he weigh now?"

The proud father answers, "Ten pounds."

The bartender is puzzled, concerned. "Why? What happened? He already weighed 20 pounds at birth".

The Texas father takes a slow swig from his long-neck Lone Star, wipes his lips on his shirtsleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says,

"Had him circumcised."

 

[*bratcat*]

LMAO

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[plasticman33]

A female computer consultant was helping a cowboy set up his computer. She asked him for his password. Wanting to embarress her he said his password was PENIS. She entered his password and laughed him out of the room when the computer responded "Password rejected, not long enough".

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Samuari]

Did ya hear

about the Texan that died in pygmy country. They look every where for a coffin big enough for this man, and thought they were going to have import one from South Africa. But a wise old woman solved the problem by giving him an enemah and found a shoe box.

 

[plasticman33]

Wahts the difference between a Texan and a bucket of shit?

Duh, the bucket!

 

[xanadu]

???

You'd think I'd get the punch line on at least one or two of these...

 

[*bratcat*]

Re: ???

 

[xanadu]

I'm just Texan...

and country...and hick to boot...it all sounds like a normal day at home around here. *sigh*

Except for the bucket remark...I take offense to the bucket remark...

 

[Stonedagger]

hehehehe

Xanadu - Bratcat - here comes the hindlick
one for each of you!!!