gauchecritic
When there are grey skies
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2002
- Posts
- 7,076
Militant and extremist groups are today up in arms about the working hours negotiations being conducted by the conscripted suicide bombers union; CSBU.
In recent talks with various political/religious factions the CSBU with a membership of some 480,000 paid conscripts, making them the largest warriors union in the modern age, have threatened a walk out in a dispute with their overlords on what constitutes a maximum working week.
A spokesperson for one military group said that being conscripts, even though they have been allowed to be unionised as per the 1976 UN policy paper 116 which covers terrorists, freedom fighters, subversives and insurrectionists of all nationalities, this union action is making a mockery of the delicate balance that exists between the forces of good and the forces of freedom.
In a press statement the CSBU said:
By far, the largest part of our membership, be they political, religious, extremist or fundamentalist have families to support and the present contractual obligations of today's conscripted suicide bomber is completely at odds with the EU directive which, whilst never having been adopted outside member states, lays down what the CSBU considers to be a fit and humane framework for the work/life balance of our members.
Press speculation suggests that "all hell will be let loose" if the population of any sovereign nation cannot be terrorised, as is their inalienable right, if these left wing pinkoes are allowed to go on strike and decide, on a whim, not to blow themselves up.
An insider at the Whitehouse in Downing Street, Bonne said:
Suicide bombing is a fraught industry and with the global recession, the freedom loving nations of the world cannot, in all conscience, condone, nor yet vilify the rights of individuals when family life is at stake.
The final word goes to a suicide bomber that prefers to remain nameless:
Suicide bombing has been in my family for generations. In the old days it was expected that a suicide bomber would work at any hour of the day or night, for as long as it took to get the job done but with the impact of today's sophisticated means of wholesale slaughter available to anyone with the right contacts the powers that be need to drag themselves into the twenty first century and finally concede that suicide bombers are just people too and deserve consideration for the dangerous job that they do. I say NO to on call bombing. NO to weekend threats and NO to more than 40 hours.
Barak Osama Gadaffi Mandela was unavailable for comment.
In recent talks with various political/religious factions the CSBU with a membership of some 480,000 paid conscripts, making them the largest warriors union in the modern age, have threatened a walk out in a dispute with their overlords on what constitutes a maximum working week.
A spokesperson for one military group said that being conscripts, even though they have been allowed to be unionised as per the 1976 UN policy paper 116 which covers terrorists, freedom fighters, subversives and insurrectionists of all nationalities, this union action is making a mockery of the delicate balance that exists between the forces of good and the forces of freedom.
In a press statement the CSBU said:
By far, the largest part of our membership, be they political, religious, extremist or fundamentalist have families to support and the present contractual obligations of today's conscripted suicide bomber is completely at odds with the EU directive which, whilst never having been adopted outside member states, lays down what the CSBU considers to be a fit and humane framework for the work/life balance of our members.
Press speculation suggests that "all hell will be let loose" if the population of any sovereign nation cannot be terrorised, as is their inalienable right, if these left wing pinkoes are allowed to go on strike and decide, on a whim, not to blow themselves up.
An insider at the Whitehouse in Downing Street, Bonne said:
Suicide bombing is a fraught industry and with the global recession, the freedom loving nations of the world cannot, in all conscience, condone, nor yet vilify the rights of individuals when family life is at stake.
The final word goes to a suicide bomber that prefers to remain nameless:
Suicide bombing has been in my family for generations. In the old days it was expected that a suicide bomber would work at any hour of the day or night, for as long as it took to get the job done but with the impact of today's sophisticated means of wholesale slaughter available to anyone with the right contacts the powers that be need to drag themselves into the twenty first century and finally concede that suicide bombers are just people too and deserve consideration for the dangerous job that they do. I say NO to on call bombing. NO to weekend threats and NO to more than 40 hours.
Barak Osama Gadaffi Mandela was unavailable for comment.
