Come unto me....

[Guest]

www.jesus.com

Come unto me.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Too funny. How the hell did he get the domain?

 

[bluespoke]

Weird!

 

[Guest]

Too funny. How the hell did he get the domain?

It was a miracle.

 

[Ginny]

SACRILEGE! <snicker>

omg..what a cool site....clever, clever....

mmmmmm the bath pics....mcyummy bod there jesus...

"Bathe with Jesus
Young women interested in bathing with Jesus can now have their dream come true. Not only will you make a new friend, but you will be supporting good hygiene and benefiting the environment by conserving water. There are no strings attached except that a picture of us, suitable for family viewing, will be taken and placed on this web site as a lasting tribute to our determined efforts at cleanliness. "

well done....should certainly snag ya a woman with keen sense of humor...or just get some weirdo...obsessed with jesus stalking you...thinking you're real...then when you get a restraining order on her..she'll break into your house...smashing window with this big wooden cross....and fucking nail ya to it....

going back to peruse it some more...too cool....reminds me of that site christopher moore recommended (more of a parody)..but..crap..my brain..can't remember it...i'll surf and post it...

 

[freescorfr]

Look Jesus, I'm sorry about all the bad jokes and so on. I got my theology all wrong, if I'd known you were only looking for the perfect woman, then I'd have known what a misguided bastard you were from the start.
Try Littledevilwithahalo, she's really sweet.

 

[Ginny]

okey dokey.....can't seem to find that site....i referred to......but....here's a book for ya, sweet jesus:

LAMB The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal
by Christopher Moore

http://www.chrismoore.com/lambprologue.html

"Christopher Moore is truly the Lord Of The Weirdos. Depending on your outlook, his work is either scandal-ously original or originally scandalous. In any case, his new novel is the sort of book that Gore Vidal's 'Live From Golgotha' should have been, the sort of book that people like Vonnegut and Robbins are always assumed to be writing, and in fact never come near. It's outrageously funny and surprisingly tender; and it serves notice that Christopher Moore isn't fooling around. I can't wait for the next one."

-- Peter S. Beagle
Author of The Last Unicorn, A Fine And Private Place, many others.


i'm sure he'd be absolutely thrilled to hear from ya, jesus....he answers all of his own email....though he is on tour now....just begin with....."I am not a weirdo..."......it worked for me......<winking>

 

[Roughneck]

Wow jesus Christ on Lit, I guess Jesus was a pervert after all.

Since we have jesus here Id like to ask him a few questions.

#1 what beer do you prefer MGD or Bud Lite?

#2 this question kinda relates to the first, Does Miller Lite taste great or less filling???

#3 Did Britney Spears get a boob job?

#4 What came first the chicken or the egg?

#5 What the hell goes through a women's head when she says nothing.

#6 Why do farts smell

#7 What your middle name

#8 did the saying Holy Shit come about when you took a shit?

 

[Starfish]

Jesus, I would be a good candidate, but I married David. Sorry.


I'd still like to annoint your feet in oils and feed you grapes, and olives while you talk of the days of yore.

Love,
Starfish

 

[sabbathstorm]

I remember this guy....entertaining as hell!

 

[chewbacca71]

OH MY GOD, (oops , sorry for the sacriledge) that was too damn funny. I never would have thought that Jesus had created the internet, I thought it was Al Gore. Chewey

 

[Roughneck]

Chewey, It might be both in the same. Al Gore thought he was alot of things, and maybe. . just maybe it's him pretending to be Jesus.

 

[estevie]

Interesting.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Wow, Jesus is here on lit. I'm so excited.

Jesus, will you baptize my breasts with your holy water?

 

[riff]

Wow, Jesus is here on lit. I'm so excited.

Jesus, will you baptize my breasts with your holy water?

Who needs Jesus when I am around. Show me your tits, ruby!

~sprinkle, sprinkle~

 

[Rubyfruit]

Holy water, riff, not holy seed.

Although, on second thought ....

 

[Roughneck]

Beat me to the Punch

Damn riff, you beat me to the punch, glad to see though that we were both thinking on the same page.

Ruby, if riff is going to sprinkle your breasts with holy seed, may I have the pleasure. . . I mean honor to fill your Holy Grail with mine?

 

[Mischka]

#1 what beer do you prefer MGD or Bud Lite?

Gag. Neither of those are beer. Beer has four ingredients - water, yeast, hops, and barley. Read the labels of those mass produced American swill - they add corn syrup and rice solids. It's sacreligious.

 

[riff]

Re: Beat me to the Punch

Damn riff, you beat me to the punch, glad to see though that we were both thinking on the same page.

Ruby, if riff is going to sprinkle your breasts with holy seed, may I have the pleasure. . . I mean honor to fill your Holy Grail with mine?

hehehehe


Love your location roughneck. Sounds like u come from the oil fields... hehehehe

 

[Roughneck]

It's a workman's beer

Mischka, I disagree with you fully. MGD is a great beer, even better then that its an American beer. MGD is just as American as mom and homemade apple pie. In fact Iv'e had a beer or 12 today.

 

[Roughneck]

100% southern

Sorry riff I'm not from the oil fields, but im from the homeland of the great south. I can say though that I spent a good amount of time in the great state we call Texas, and I haven't found a state since then that has held my heart in such a way.

 

[Mischka]

Roughneck, I agree that it's truly an American concoction. Those fillers dillute the alocohol content, so you have to consume more just to get the same effect as from a real bear. Consuming more means you have to buy more, which increases sales and the ever-important bottom line (the fillers cost much less than the true ingredients). Plus the higher calorie to alcohol ratio means you pack on more pounds faster, which in turn fuels the diet and lite beer industries. American ingenuity at its finest.

 

[Roughneck]

All very good points Mischka, and I fully agree with you. I know the beer in America is water downed, and being that I was in the Airforce I had the pleasure of going to Europe and sampleing quite a few European beers, one of my fav would be the Chez beer. The fact is though Europeans look at beer alot different then Americans. Beer in Europe is a common beverage that you have with your meals and children drinking it in that fashion is seen as exceptable. Here in America that type of behavior is seen as wrong. Witch leads me to wonder, if we took the stance on beer like they do in Europe would we have so much underage drinking and drunk driving. It just seems when the American goverment deems certain behaviors as bad that problems arise from it.

By the way I've been to the UK many times, and have always enjoyed the pubs there, wasn't to crazy on the luke warm beer, but the people were great. Plan on taking another trip over there this summer to sow some more wild oats, LOL

 

[Rambling Rose]

http://www.babysue.com/jstrip5.GIF

 

[Mischka]

Which leads me to wonder, if we took the stance on beer like they do in Europe would we have so much underage drinking and drunk driving.

Excellent point, and I agree that we make a much bigger deal out of alcohol than our European counterparts, much to our detriment. I think there's one more factor to consider, however - the major cities over there have much better public transportation than we do. Hard to drive drunk when you're taking the tube home.

I think I'll run for office. My campaign platform - better beer and better public transportation!