Cohabitation

[mikolajka]

Study completed, thanks for the help. No more emails/PMs please.

 

[dollface007]

Yay for research! Unfortunately, I have to point out an inconsistency:

Common-law relationships, or common-law marriage, is absolutely not the same thing as cohabitation. Common-law marriage varies from state to state. Some states do not have an institution called "common-law marriage" and some states do. Some of the criteria often used for common-law marriage are:
-a certain number of years (7 years, 10 years, etc) together as a couple
-living together
-having a witness who thinks that you are a married couple
-having told someone else that you are married (even if you don't have a marriage license)

You can be in a cohabiting relationship and not be in a common-law marriage. In fact, most cohabitors in the U.S. would not qualify as a common law couple since most cohabiting relationships fall short of the time requirement (ending in marriage or break-up). Most (good) surveys allow people to identify themselves as cohabitors, but a cohabiting relationship is usually defined simply as two people living together as a romantic couple. Remember, those can be opposite and same-sex couples.

I expect you, as a responsible scientist, to report your aggregated results to us once you have analyzed them. To protect confidentiality, you should give people the option of replying to your survey in a pm, and you should also consider posting your survey on the General Board to get a larger sample.

Good luck,
Doll
Lit's Resident Sociologist

 

[Willing and Unsure]

Although I respect research and all, I do not respect someone that comes to an internet forum to gain research results. Everything I have learned of having surveys done, you need real people in a real place (not the internet) to get accurate results. I'm sure there are plenty of people here that could easily skew your results just for the fun of it, where they wouldnt do that if they were in a real place with a pen and piece of paper. Not just that, every person that does a survey knows that you should offer an incentive to your subjects as a way to say thank you for their help.

 

[dollface007]

I totally agree with you W&S. You cannot get decent information that is statistically *representative* of any population unless you've got mucho cash (not to mention permission from Human Subjects). However, since I'm assuming mikolajka will not be publishing her results in any major academic journals, i'm willing to let a web survey slide as a learning experience. Her paper should be very specific to state that her results only pertain to the people who answer her survey and are not indicative of anyone else's experience. Does that make it a useful study? Maybe not, but if your professor is requiring you to collect your own data, you have to start somewhere.

 

[SweetErika]

What they said.

In addition to the whole common law/cohabitation mix-up, some of the questions and formatting are confusing or will likely give you poorer results.

COHABITATION QUESTIONNAIRE

2.) Age: Under 13
13-17 years old
18-22 years old
23-27 years old
28-32 years old
33-37 years old
38-43 years old
44-48 years old
49 and Above
Under what circumstances would a child respond to this survey?


6.) Cohabitation will lead to a failed relationship:
a) True
b) False
c) I do not know
You might get better results if this was an agree/disagree scale response.

8.) How do you view couples who decide to cohabitate as an alternative to marriage?
a) Agree strongly
b) Disagree somewhat
c) Neither agree nor disagree
d) Agree somewhat
e) Strongly Agree d) Agree somewhat
e) Strongly Agree

Remove duplicates.

9.) Should you decide to cohabitate, would you do so as an alternative to marriage? Yes No

What about people who do it as an alternative for awhile?

10.) Have you ever been in a common-law relationship? Yes No

11.) If currently in a common-law relationship, state how long it has lasted. 1 years
2 years
3 years
4 years
5 or more years

How long total? Or how long since you started cohabitating?


16.) I view cohabitation as:
a) long term
b) short term
c) I do not know
It might serve you well to add time amounts instead of trusting individual definitions on st and lt.


For questions 17-21, it might be good to add an "Equal" choice. A lot of people have an opinion, but feel marriage and cohabitation are equal on many issues.

 

[phoenix1224]

Although I respect research and all, I do not respect someone that comes to an internet forum to gain research results. Everything I have learned of having surveys done, you need real people in a real place (not the internet) to get accurate results.

Exactly.

That's why all of Kinsey's research methods and subsequent findings were considered flawed... Most within just a few years of the original research.

His problem was that the people in his day that were the most likely to openly discuss sex were also the ones who were most likely to engage in more "deviant" sexual activities... So, his statistics on how many people have had gay, bi, bdsm (etc.) experiences were much higher than was true in society as a whole.

So, I would suggest that you post something in either your school paper or on a bulletin board stating that you're coducting a survey and need some volunteers... Offer them like ten bucks for their time.

 

[Eilan]

I totally agree with you W&S. You cannot get decent information that is statistically *representative* of any population unless you've got mucho cash (not to mention permission from Human Subjects). However, since I'm assuming mikolajka will not be publishing her results in any major academic journals, i'm willing to let a web survey slide as a learning experience. Her paper should be very specific to state that her results only pertain to the people who answer her survey and are not indicative of anyone else's experience. Does that make it a useful study? Maybe not, but if your professor is requiring you to collect your own data, you have to start somewhere.

Good points.

I used to teach Composition II, in which the students were required to write a research paper. One of the departmental mandates was that the students HAD to use a minimum number of sources (10) and a variety of sources. That's not unreasonable, though the students were inclined to disagree.

However, the powers that be in the English department decided that the students had to use either an interview or a survey as one of their sources. Though I didn't agree with the department, I had to enforce the rule. For that reason, I used to allow my students who chose to conduct surveys to distribute them in class (after I'd approved a draft of the survey).

It wasn't a particularly scientific approach, but we were talking about a 7 to 10 page essay at a rural college where the students have limited resources (and intellectual capacities, in some cases) for in-depth research.

 

[mikolajka]

Thank you all for the feedback! I'm currently in my senior level of highschool, and my teacher asked for 20 questionnaires to be completed. I've been studying this topic for the past 6 months, and this is my first questionnaire. I should have specified that I meant couples living together, and not in any legal sense.

Dollface007 brought up a good point about pm-ing, and I'll gladly accept any pms that people send me. Or, if you wish to send me it through email, I can honestly say that I only plan to print out the survey, without any identification, and delete the original message with the email address.
As well, I would gladly post up my results and analysis of the survey if anyone is interested.

I do realize this method of research is extremely biased, but for conducting a survey in highschool, it is accepted and more likely expected by my teacher to be slightly biased. Of course, I still have to mention where I retrived my results. I have tried to keep this survey unbiased by also going to neighbours, classmates, and acquaintances (my teacher recommended that I hand out my survey to people in malls, but with the minimum 20 questions, I hardly doubt that people would fill it out in the middle of their shopping.).

SweetErica: The reason for the large age span for this survey is because I tried to create it so it applies to both people who have/are in cohabitating relationships, and/or their thoughts about cohabitating relationships.
As well, thank you so much with correcting my many mistakes. I'll post a revised version if anyone on the board is interested in completing this survey. I'm incredibly sorry if this annoys people, but it's for a safe and amateur cause.

 

[SweetErika]

Good luck with the project, class, and graduation, Nichole! I'll be happy to respond to your revised version (so you don't get different results from two surveys), and look forward to seeing the results. It's certainly an interesting topic, especially considering the social and political climate today.

 

[dollface007]

So, I would suggest that you post something in either your school paper or on a bulletin board stating that you're coducting a survey and need some volunteers... Offer them like ten bucks for their time.

This is totally ridiculous *especially* in light of what mikolajka just posted. You're talking about getting unbiased samples. Well, guess what...to do that you have to get a random sample of people. You'd have to pay a company that specializes in sampling to do that for you. Even if you conceded to go with a convenience sample, even if you only had to get a sample of 10 people, do you have a hundred bucks to waste on a research paper? Most high school/college students i know don't have that kind of money to throw around.

What most researchers with no money do is to apply for a grant or use existing data. There is data on cohabitation out there, but not with the specific questions that mikolajka wants answered. Even if the data is public and free to use, you must have access to a.) the statistical software to analyze it, and b.) the knowledge to do a statistical analysis.

As for Kinsey, he had no knowledge of, and refused to understand statistics and sampling. He thought that more cases meant better data. He was a very tenacious and sometimes very misguided man.

 

[phoenix1224]

This is totally ridiculous...<snip>

How so?

Although I understand what you're saying about the money issue, many people will NOT participate in a survey unless there's something in it for THEM (I know that I sure as hell wouldn't)... Time IS money after all... *shrugs*

And, in order to ensure that the responses are as unbiased as possible (at least for HER needs), all she has to do is to ask people if they'd be willing to participate without any fore knowledge of the survey's topic.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

This is totally ridiculous *especially* in light of what mikolajka just posted. You're talking about getting unbiased samples. Well, guess what...to do that you have to get a random sample of people. You'd have to pay a company that specializes in sampling to do that for you. Even if you conceded to go with a convenience sample, even if you only had to get a sample of 10 people, do you have a hundred bucks to waste on a research paper? Most high school/college students i know don't have that kind of money to throw around.

I know what she just posted, and for high school, there's nothing wrong wtih this type of survey, as long as she makes sure to state that the results are possibly biased and where she got the information from.

As far as it goes if she were doing this for real research that may be published, you are more likely to get unbiased results if you have a random sample of people taking your survey (or being a test subject). After I got into college, you would get offered something for your time. I've received all sorts of different thigns for being a test subject, including free movie tickets ($18.00) and pizza ($13.00) and even a free health screening once.

But as it is, she could offer an incentive to people to do this survey, even something as simple as a candy bar (that's what I did in high school). In college, when we did unpublished research using surveys, we would turn to other people in our classes if it was a short survey. If it was something longer, we'd offer some form of caffeine (usually a can of Mt. Dew). You find what's reasonable if you want to offer an incentive.

 

[mikolajka]

Thanks for all the help and suggestions. I hope to persue social sciences in the future and everything mentioned has shed some light on what I should be aware of for next year in university. So thanks all for the suggestions and feedback!
I posted a revised copy of the survey if anyone wants to do it. Sorry that I don't have anything really to offer for using your time.

As well, thanks so much SweetErica for volunteering! Anyone who wants to complete it can pm me or email me! Thanks!

 

[Ezzy]

Yay for research! Unfortunately, I have to point out an inconsistency:

Common-law relationships, or common-law marriage, is absolutely not the same thing as cohabitation. Common-law marriage varies from state to state. Some states do not have an institution called "common-law marriage" and some states do. Some of the criteria often used for common-law marriage are:
-a certain number of years (7 years, 10 years, etc) together as a couple
-living together
-having a witness who thinks that you are a married couple
-having told someone else that you are married (even if you don't have a marriage license)

You can be in a cohabiting relationship and not be in a common-law marriage. In fact, most cohabitors in the U.S. would not qualify as a common law couple since most cohabiting relationships fall short of the time requirement (ending in marriage or break-up). Most (good) surveys allow people to identify themselves as cohabitors, but a cohabiting relationship is usually defined simply as two people living together as a romantic couple. Remember, those can be opposite and same-sex couples.

I expect you, as a responsible scientist, to report your aggregated results to us once you have analyzed them. To protect confidentiality, you should give people the option of replying to your survey in a pm, and you should also consider posting your survey on the General Board to get a larger sample.

Good luck,
Doll
Lit's Resident Sociologist

There are really two types of common law marriages. The "traditional" common law marriage is one which is entered into without formalities. This type of marriage is usually defined as the intent to be married combined with living together and holding one's self out to the world as married. States which recognize the "traditional" form of common law marriage include (as of 1998) Alabama, Colorado, District of Columbia, Georgia, Idaho (only if before 1-1-96), Iowa, Kansas, Montana, Ohio (only if before 10-10-91), Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina and Texas.

A different kind of common law marriage is represented by the situation where a valid marriage is formed from an invalid marriage after the impediment is lifted. For example, a party might be underage at the time of the marriage. Continued cohabitation as husband and wife after the underage party attains majority, however, results in the marriage ripening into validity where this form of common law marriage is recognized. Note that the courts may be reluctant to find a valid marriage when the parties have entered into a relationship knowing it to be polygamous, even after the impediment to marriage has been terminated.

In those states which recognize "traditional", common law marriage, there are several requirements for the formation of such a marriage. The first is the express mutual consent and intent to be married. In addition, parties must hold themselves out to the world as being married or "must openly and professedly live as husband and wife" in most of these jurisdictions. While intent may certainly be proven by words, the incidence of "swearing contests" between parties who dispute whether or not there was an intent to be married have induced the courts to rely on parties actions and conduct at least as much as there were in trying to resolve this issue. Was there a joint bank account? Was the name on it "Mr. & Mrs."? How did the lease read -- "Mr. & Mrs."? By the evidence of the common law marriage involves examining documents such as these to divine the intent of the parties. There is no specific length of time recognized generally as a requirement for the formation of the common law marriage.

Even if the state does not recognize common law marriages itself, it will usually recognize one that was formed in a state which does recognize common law marriages. In addition, most states will recognize a common law marriage if the parties at some time during their period of living together resided in a state that allows the formation of common law marriages. Even if the parties begin living together in a state that does not allow the formation of common law marriages, they can inadvertently form a common law marriage, so long as the requisite "holding out," intent and cohabitation are present, if they move to a state that allows common law marriages. On the other hand, a temporary visit to a state that allows the formation of a common law marriage, so long as the parties are domiciled in another state which does not recognize them, usually will not result in a valid common law marriage.

Because a common-law marriage is not formally recorded, the couple, if challenged, may have to prove the existence of their marriage contract. They may have to prove that they live together as man and wife and present themselves to the public as a married couple. Where recognized, a common-law marriage is as valid as a typical marriage. Ascertain if the state/country you are living in recognizes common law marriages.

There are four requirements for a valid common law marriage. Just living together isn't enough to validate a common law marriage:

1. You must live together.


2. You must present yourselves to others as a married couple. Some ways of doing this are by using the same last name, referring to one another as husband or wife, and filing a joint tax return.


3. Although not defined, you have to be together for a significant period of time.


4. You must intend to be married.

In the U.S., every state is Constitutionally required to recognize as valid a common-law marriage that was recognized in another state.

Eleven states and the District of Columbia currently recognize common-law marriages. Each of these jurisdictions has unique requirements for common-law marriage:

1. Alabama: The requirements for a common-law marriage are: (1) capacity; (2) an agreement to be husband and wife; and (3) consummation of the marital relationship.

2. Colorado: A common-law marriage may be established by proving cohabitation and a reputation of being married.

3. District of Columbia: The requirements for a common-law marriage are: (1) an express, present intent to be married and (2) cohabitation.

4. Iowa: The requirements for a common-law marriage are: (1) intent and agreement to be married; (2) continuous cohabitation; and (3) public declarations that the parties are husband and wife.

5. Kansas: For a man and woman to form a common-law marriage, they must: (1) have the mental capacity to marry; (2) agree to be married at the present time; and (3) represent to the public that they are married.

6. Montana: The requirements for a common-law marriage are: (1) capacity to consent to the marriage; (2) an agreement to be married; (3) cohabitation; and (4) a reputation of being married.

7. Oklahoma: To establish a common-law marriage, a man and woman must (1) be competent; (2) agree to enter into a marriage relationship; and (3) cohabit.

8. Pennsylvania: A common-law marriage may be established if a man and woman exchange words that indicate that they intend to be married at the present time.

9. Rhode Island: The requirements for a common-law marriage are: (1) serious intent to be married and (2) conduct that leads to a reasonable belief in the community that the man and woman are married.

10. South Carolina: A common-law marriage is established if a man and woman intend for others to believe they are married.

11. Texas: A man and woman who want to establish a common-law marriage must sign a form provided by the county clerk. In addition, they must (1) agree to be married, (2) cohabit, and (3) represent to others that they are married.

12. Utah: For a common-law marriage, a man and woman must (1) be capable of giving consent and getting married; (2) cohabit; and (3) have a reputation of being husband and wife.

New Hampshire recognizes common law marriages only for the purposes of inheritance. In any other state the only marriage that is recognized as valid is an official one. However, if you enter into common law marriage while living in one of the states that permits them, and then move to a state that doesn't, the new state should recognize your marriage as being legally entered into in the other state.

Another thing to consider is that it takes more than just living together to have a common law marriage. Not every couple that lives together intends to be married. The intention to be married is one of the required elements to create a common law marriage. Another element that is necessary to create a common law marriage is that the couple must present themselves as married to others. This means referring to each other as the other's husband or wife, using the same last name, filing joint tax returns, and things of that nature.

Suppose you opt for the common law marriage believing that, if the relationship ends, you'll avoid a nasty divorce proceeding. This is a bad reason to have a common law marriage. A common law marriage is legally recognized as a marriage and the way to end it is by getting a divorce. You won't be able to escape the formalities on this end as you did at the beginning. In fact you might find your divorce a little more complex, because first there will have to be a trial to prove whether or not you were married. If the court decides that your relationship was a common law marriage, then you'll need to get a divorce to end it.

The problem of proving whether or not you are married under the "common law" can plague you even if you don't want a divorce. This is because the marriage relationship involves various legal rights, and if you want to exercise any of those rights, you may find yourself being challenged in court. Consider the following scenarios.

Your common law wife is killed in an automobile accident. The accident is the other driver's fault and you want to file a wrongful death lawsuit so that you can be compensated for your loss and your deceased wife's loss. In order to have standing to bring the suit, you need to have a legally recognized relationship to the deceased. The issue of whether or not your relationship constituted a common law marriage may end up being litigated.

Your common law husband dies without a will. You don't have any children together. You could end up in a court fight with his parents (or other close relatives) about who should inherit his property. They will be claiming to be entitled to his property because the two of you were never married. You will be trying to prove that your relationship constituted a common law marriage.

These and various other legal rights are impacted by the marriage relationship. Having a common law marriage could require you to go to court to prove your married before you can exercise your rights as husband or wife. If your intent is truly to be married, you are probably better off avoiding a "common law" marriage.

Tennessee has employed a doctrine of "estoppel to deny marriage." See Note, Informal Marriages in Tennessee - Marriage by Estoppel, by Prescription and by Ratification, 3 VAND. L. REV. 610, 614-15 (1950).

* According to OCC, estoppel is based upon the common law that may apply under many circumstances, but a common one is where an individual has obtained an invalid divorce. The estoppel principle is applied to an invalid or ineffective divorce and is used to prevent parties to such divorce from later asserting that they are still validly married. Thus, the parties are precluded from denying that the divorce is valid for Social Security purposes. The need to develop estoppel most often occurs in claim situations where a divorce was obtained in a State or foreign country where neither party was domiciled. The need may also occur in situations where divorce proceedings were defective. For example, an otherwise valid divorce was obtained but it was ineffective because the judge failed to sign it, the final decree was not properly recorded, or the court costs were never paid. Even though such a divorce is not valid under State law, if the estoppel principle applies, the divorce is treated as a final divorce for Social Security purposes.

States which have abolished common-law marriage by statute.

If members want to take the survey, assuming they are not; 1) Under 13. 2)Under 18, as per Literotica site rules, etc. they could just quote the first post and fill in their answers, then post it here, there would be no privacy issues for any member to post here would there?

 

[dollface007]

How so?

Although I understand what you're saying about the money issue, many people will NOT participate in a survey unless there's something in it for THEM (I know that I sure as hell wouldn't)... Time IS money after all... *shrugs*

And, in order to ensure that the responses are as unbiased as possible (at least for HER needs), all she has to do is to ask people if they'd be willing to participate without any fore knowledge of the survey's topic.

I never said incentives are ridiculous. I said a $10 incentive for *this* study (which is what you proposed) is ridiculous.

Also, the general rule in social surveys is that you don't offer cash incentives (unless it is literally a $1 bill) if the survey takes under a half hour to complete. Marketing and medical research can afford way way more than that. Today just got offered $50 from a marketing firm to be in a focus group of laptop users. In social science research, you're lucky if you get $20 and a meal for being in a focus group. And yes, people actually will participate without an incentive as long as the questionnaire is short, which mikolajka's questionnaire is. Surprisingly enough, people LOVE to talk about themselves (just as long as you don't ask them how much they make), and often see the value in, or are at least curious about, social research.

Ezzy, thanks for going into such great detail over common-law marriage. I have to admit, I don't have the attention span to read that whole thing!

 

[Ezzy]

Ezzy, thanks for going into such great detail over common-law marriage. I have to admit, I don't have the attention span to read that whole thing!

LOL Me either, but I did have enough to skim through it, then cut and paste it and add my comment at the end.

In the UK where I grew up, if you cohabited for 6 months and a day, that gave "common law" rights to both parties.

So my girlfriends used to have to move all their things out for a weekend while I decorated twice a year.

After 6 months and a day each party ( male or female) had the rights to 50% of all the assets.

It sure makes you more careful about who you picked to live with!

 

[Ezzy]

(Revised- Revised Copy) COHABITATION QUESTIONNAIRE

PLEASE BOLD ONE OF THE FOLLOWING:

1.) Gender: Male Female

2.) Age: 18-22 years old
23-27 years old
28-32 years old
33-37 years old
38-43 years old
44-48 years old
49 and Above

3.) What is your martial status? Single Dating Married Cohabitating Widowed

4.) How would you rate your happiness in terms of your marital status?
a) I am extremely happy
b) I am somewhat happy
c) I am content
d) I am somewhat unhappy
e) I am unhappy
f) I do not know

5.) Cohabitation is good way to establish a steady relationship with another:
a) Disagree strongly
b) Disagree somewhat
c) Neither agree nor disagree
d) Agree somewhat it allows you to make a mistake and learn from it without making two attorneys richer and you poorer at the same time.
e) Strongly agree

6.) Cohabitation will lead to a failed relationship:
a) Agree
b) Disagree
c) I do not know

7.) How do you view couples who decide to cohabitate?
a) I think it is an excellent idea
b) I think it is a good idea
c) I have no opinion
c) I do not like the idea of it
e) I definitely do not like the idea of it

8.) How do you view couples who decide to cohabitate as an alternative to marriage?
a) Agree strongly
b) Agree somewhat
c) Neither agree nor disagree It's their choice.
d) Disagree somewhat
e) Disagree strongly

9.) Should you decide to cohabitate, would you do so as an alternative to marriage? Yes No

10.) Have you ever been in a common-law relationship? Yes No

11.) If currently in a cohabitating relationship, how long has it been since you started: -

1 year
2 years
3 years
4 years
5 or more years


12.) If you had been in a common-law relationship that has ended, what was the cause for the break-up?
a) Cheating
b) Commitment Issues
c) Economic
d) Parental and/or family issues
e) Other

13.) If you had not previously been in a common-law relationship, would you consider it? (Not applicable for those who have been in a common-law
relationship previously.)
a) Yes
b) No
c) Maybe
d) Not applicable

14.) If you would consider being in a common-law relationship, what would be the reasons? (Circle the amount you feel is necessary)
a) To test out a relationship
b) Not feeling “ready” for a marriage commitment
c) The expense to establish a marriage; cohabitation is a cheap alternative
d) The freedom of leaving a relationship at any time
e) I will never consider being in common-law relationship
f) Other: (please specify, may list more than one)_______________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________

15.) Would you recommend this lifestyle to another?
a) Yes
b) No
c) Maybe

16.) I view cohabitation as:
a) 1 month-1 year
b) 2-3 years
c) 4-5 years
d) 6-7 years
e) 7-8 years
f) 9 or more
g) until it ends

17.) In your opinion, what do you think of common-law relationships in terms of
stability compared to married relationships?
a) Marriage is overall better
b) Marriage is slightly better
c) Marriage and Cohabitation are about as stable as each other
d) Cohabitation is slightly better
e) Cohabitation is overall better
f) I do not know

18.) In your opinion, what do you think of common-law relationships in terms of economics compared to married relationships?
a) Marriage is overall better
b) Marriage is slightly better Due to health insurance cover issues, all else being equal.
c) Cohabitation is slightly better
d) Cohabitation is overall better
e) I do not know

19.)In your opinion, what do you think of common-law relationships in terms of health (such as mental health) compared to married relationships?
a) Marriage is overall better
b) Marriage is slightly better
c) Marriage and Cohabitation are about as healthy as each other
d) Cohabitation is slightly better
e) Cohabitation is overall better
f) I do not know

20.) In your opinion, what do you think of common-law relationships in terms of safety (such as, against domestic abuse) compared to married relationships?
a) Marriage is overall better
b) Marriage is slightly better
c) Marriage and Cohabitation are about as abusive as each other this is down to personalities not about marriage, cohabitation, going steady, or being on a first date.
d) Cohabitation is slightly better
e) Cohabitation is overall better
f) I do not know

21.) In your opinion, what do you think of common-law relationships in terms of overall marital happiness compared to married relationships?
a) Marriage is overall better
b) Marriage is slightly better
c) Marriage and Cohabitation are about as happy as each other this also assumes that people who marry or cohabit would not be as happy in the other state!
d) Cohabitation is slightly better
e) Cohabitation is overall better
f) I do not know

You’re welcome!

 

[Ezzy]

Ok, so I posted a reply to the questionare and killed the thread with that post. sob