C'mon over, Juvenile party 'bout 2 start. I even got some Pixie stix!

[modest mouse]

Paste your favorite immature lyrics/thoughts...whatever....I could give a fuck......Noone mentally matured past 14 allowed.

MC Paul Barman - MTV Get off the Air pt.2

[MCPB]
A little goon
in a locker room
rat-tails the octaroon
He'll be drinking vodka soon
and his big brothers are frat guys
whose IQs lose to their fitted baseball hat size
Smirkin' jocks with hackysacks
in Birkenstocks and khaki slacks
I'm the hypest lyricist
while they're like, "What type of beer is this?"
The liquid is ubiquitous
and has such a hold
on all the strata, it's just got to be
government-controlled
Behind the bottle and the throne
sits an unknown man wiser
and bigger for the liquor store
the number one franchiser
Perhaps George Bush and his sons
are relatives of Anheiser

I wanted to get in a pooper hole one day
so I invited girls over on Super Bowl Sunday
only one showed up: Princess Superstar

[PS]
Thanks for inviting me over
let me look around the bed post
(bad dill folds?) back to back black dildos
nice kit kudos
pass the cool ranch doritos
I love nachos
put on Fat Joe
naw, that really sucks, let's put on the Beatles
Yo, let's check the half time show
I hope it's Michael Jackson
singin Satisfaction with Hanson
or Luther Vandross in a sparkling costume
with big pants dancin
or maybe I saw that in a Bud Light commercial
speakin' of which, give this bitch
a drink quick to wet my lips
you got enough cheddar lyin' around this place to
fix
up my tits
as if I need it...

[MCPB]
Conchetta please!
If you see any chedda'
it's chedda cheese
I'm easily great
I don't need to be in some sort of (cankeesy?) state
to create something you can appreciate

[PS] Who are you talkin to?
[MCPB] Makin you draw conclusions
and superficial distinctions make you go sacreu bleu

[PS]
I can speak French too
suck my nuh-nuh
french my cunt
comprande voux?
Look Pepe Le Pieux
let's cut to the (de nu-mon?)
you wanna fuck me, I wanna fuck you
so it's on.

[MCPB]
Can I chime in?
I'll still be rhymin'
when I'm in your hymen
I radiate like it was '88
and I'm searching for my lady mate
I'm a hunter-gatherer
a cunter-latherer
My dandy voice makes the most anti-choice
granny's panties moist

I do the new when the tried and true fails
plus I'm lookin' fly in my sky blue tails
Now peel off your tube top
so I can feel your boobs flop on my lubed cock
socks up to your calf like a chick from the (craff?)
I wanna put on a serated condom and saw you in half

[PS]
My knees are weak, I need knee-pads
you fuck me blind, I can't see, dag!
run me a hot bath add the epsom salt
soak my lower half in your Mortal Kombat cocktail sauce
let me head south
put it in my mouth
cause I like the taste.

[MCPB]
When I burst in your face
I'll invade your personal space

[PS]
I'm like Chase, stick your card in and out
Thanks see, look how much stacks of cream are coming out

[MCPB]
I removed her sanitary napkin with my teeth
and there was a planetary backspin underneath
I faced her wound
Let's do a pap smear with a taster spoon
you can sleep on the guest cot
I'll sleep in the wet spot

(Singing)
I'll be your boyfriend
Smooch on your pooper hole
all through the Super Bowl
your man doesn't even miss you
glued to the boob tube, watchya gonna do dude?

I woke up sticky
and quickly applied a temporary tattoo to a hickey
went to salt and shake her awake
with orange juice, a straw, and coffee cake
after we had a bite,
we pushed the canoe in the lake

[PS] You don't paddle right
[MCPB] Look, a shooting star!
[PS] It's a fuckin satellite
[MCPB] Lady, one more complaint
and I'll shove a rape-whistle up the Mrs. Va-J-J
(starts whistling)

[PS]
What'd you say?!?!
Listen Slim Shay-day
tell Dre he better fuckin pay may (me)
(starts laughing)

[MCPB]
Your talents are bite-size
it's no suprise you rhyme with white guys
I jumped in the water
what did I want a girlfriend for?
Just like you, you jizz on your floor.
I don't want sweet potatoes anymore
I didn't even leave her an oar
did a medium crawl stroke back to shore

Who's next to flirt with this exhausting extrovert?
I parted some (palm frawns?)
Guess who left me dry long johns
Uncle Ralph McDaniels
He said "what's up Paul Nathaniel Barman
let's get MTV off the air I deserve my own channel."

 

[Svedish_Chef]

Shhh, secret squirrel.

 

[modest mouse]

Princess Superstar - Bad Babysitter

Babysitting sucks but whatever they got junk food, kung fu, egg fu, Dig Dug, a dog too
And a hot Jew, Mr. Weintraub, I mean he's old but not dimed out
If I'm bad I'll turn around in the corner for Time Out
Aight Josh what you wanna do? You wanna watch cartoons?
HBO got Platoon, hey get back in the room!
I assume your folks are gonna be out late, go make me Kool Aid
I'm a sit on the couch and masturbate then call my boyfriend Gabe and see if he ate
Spit out my Bubbalicious and get to one of them big fridges that could fit 10 midgets
Damn they're rich, hey she left me fifty dishes-bitch!
Let's try on ya mom's minks think she'll miss these Chanel links?
In high heels you look like Jar Jar Binks- go play under the sink
(I want my mommy and daddy!) I want your daddy as well
But if you tell, you'll die of sickle cell and God told me you're goin straight to hell
Well if you don't like it I can leave and then you'll be alone believe me that's what the creepy monsters want
Plus I'll be taking your TV
Put on your jammers and don't wet the bed I got a camera
I'll take a picture and show that little girl you like Sarah
Oh and one more thing- there's been several mass murderers spotted in the area
I'm a bad babysitter, got my boyfriend in your shower, Woo! I'm makin 6 bucks an hour
Let's make Fluffernutters don't fuckin utter another peep
I'll take the cookie cutter make star cookies outta ya skin while you sleep
Keep still, I gotta check the bathroom cabinet hey what are these pills?
I'll take the Valium Josh you take a bag and the Tagament
Stop throwin up I'm not paid enough you clean up the rug
Is that Fluff? I told you 6 boxes of unmade Jell-O was too much All right kid you gotta go to bed, I know its only 6 but my boy just came over and he wants me to give him head
Sit his bare ass on the couch where you watch Small Wonder
Next time you see Vicky the spot'll be sticky cuz I sucked his dicky and used your mom's cucumber
Don't worry I'll put it back in the Frigidaire
Scared? You can have it for supper nice and crisp in the Tupperware
No bedtime story, Gabe get off you're so horny!
Josh get in bed and Freddie Krueger might let you see your mom in the mornin
No porn and shut the shade Gabe-
One day you'll know how nice it is to get laid while you gettin paid

 

[lavender]

 

[modest mouse]

This thread would never be possible without the illustrious Kool Keith and his Sex Style album. Tanks Keith, take your meds.

Lets get this clubhouse rockin' with da beats!

Kool Keith - Sex Style

"Now the first drop of juice is there for her to see
Honey, that's when she backs off and just lick her teeth..."

Chorus:
(Sex style!) Niggas want it free
They dogs drink my piss (Girls pay a fee)

You want freestlye, that's right, the style is free
Niggas suck my dick and they girls drink my pee
I'm on some S&M shit you can't get with
Pull your panties down on stage and watch you sweat quick
Suckers back to pull their style's transsexual
Lesbians dance with the funky heterosexual
You on the mic, and when you rhyme I start to jerk off
Let my dog lick you German Shepard want to bust off
I tell your legs and swat em, MC's having anal sex
Step around like a Tampax, and step up next
I enter New York, no problem with my dick out
California porno star, my ass you can lick out
Saying "What?" with sperm dripping down your partner's butt
I see MC's in my face with their ass up
Let me put my cape on, my rubber and my mask up
Not no horror-core shit, this is porno-core
I'm in the club naked man, I'm the fucking pro
Niggas can't wax no ass, girls should let them know

Chorus x3

Back I wreck shit, so what nigga? I masturbate
See your girls' cocked back, her legs tied like a figure eight
I'm on stage getting sucked by Madonna
Sticking piped in your ass until you stop the freesyle drama
I pioneered this shit, you keep sucking dick
Your girl's in the crowd, hawking me for a naked flick
I got my silk underwear for the atmosphere
Piss in your face and urinate all in your hair
You name a group that's shit, I will pooper-scoop
Fuck with this, miss, I will damage on the premesis
Niggas step back with Dax grease, watch their ass twist
I rhyme any nigga, golden showers up in Greek Alley
Movie star bitches, MC's lining up in Cali
Drinking vodka, Absolut, sipping Tanqueray
Mc's jump off, I stung your rectum like a stingray
Girls heinie-wipe, MC's say my style is hype
Pussies relax, I'd rather fuck them with a cordless mic
Could rob a horse, pull your panties off and pay the cost

Chorus x2

"May they beat his bowels with a ten-pound hammer til his asshole
whistles the Star-Spangled Banner."

Now the nurse is here, Dr. Butcher to your anus
I don't care who your are, and if you think you're famous
You could be waxed, seventy-five fucking rap groups
Bisexuals on stage eating fruit loops
Sugar smacks, I got the rhythm for your ass cracks
Bring your girl, she fantasize in my sex world

Chorus x3

 

[lavender]

 

[lavender]

 

[lilminx]

Oops, these aren't really juvenile. Just funny. Sorry.

Dork!

Jill Sobule
Supermodel

I don´t care what my teachers say
I´m gonna be a supermodel.
Everyone is gonna dress like me,
wait and see

When I´m a supermodel
and my hair will shine like the sea.
Everyone will wanna look just like me
me................

Cause I´m young and Im hip and so beautiful,
I´m gonna be a supermodel
(2x)

I wish that I was like Tori Spelling,
with a car likes hers and dad likes hers.
And I show them how how it was done.
That be fun, that be fun.

And I write my schoolreport,
on why I love my jeans, why I love my jeans.
And oh, oh my lockerdoor it is the coolest thing
that you have ever seen.

Cause I´m young and I´m hip and so beautiful,
I´m gonna be a supermodel
(2x)

I didn´t yesterday,
I´m not gonna eat today
I´m not gonna eat tomorrow
Cause I´m gonna be a supermodel

so beautiful.......I´m gonna be a supermodel
Cause I´m young and I´m hip and so beautiful,
I´m gonna be a supermodel
(4x)

I´m gonna be a supermodel
I´m gonna be a supermodel

 

[modest mouse]

Is it just me or do my lyrics look odd alonside the rest of the thread?

You'd think I had a fondness for songs about ass licking and 'flopping your boobs on my lubed cock'.

C'mon....lets sneak some Vodka from the liquor cabinet.