Closer

[_no_more_]

Closure

I met someone here, on Lit, ages ago it seems now. One thing led to another and soon we were talking of forever and happy ever afters. The warning signs were there then but I refused to acknowledge them. People warned me, time after time…I refused to listen. They were right.

I placed all my hope, trust and love with him, foolishly wearing my heart on my sleeve. God, how I regret that now. Such a stupid innocent. I gave him the world and all I asked in return was his love, loyalty and attention. Supposedly I received his love but the rest I did not. I believed every lie he fed to me. I thought I was special. Instead I was used and the worst part is I went along with it. I have no one to blame but myself. Those closest to you have the power to hurt you the most.

He fucking cheated on me. For months. I knew it and asked him repeatedly about it. He lied. Eventually he came clean…It hurt. This was after I had already been put through hell by the selfishness and immaturity of his previous actions. Even after all that I would have taken the bastard back but he refused to tell me her name.

I still do not know her name. That’s all I asked. All I wanted to know. He won’t give it to me. Even after all he did to me and all that he claims he feels for me I cannot have that. He is protecting her.

She knows who I am. And has probably laughed her ass off at me and my foolish innocence. I need closure.

I feel humiliated, ashamed and abused.

I have moved on, but this I need to fully end it. I have met someone else. Someone who knows what a gift I have given him. Thank you.

I just wanted to see if someone might come clean with their actions. If not, well I now have had my say in this matter. Also perhaps Lit will become aware of how some members here do not give a fuck about others. For some of us, emotions demonstrated here, are very very real. When you ‘cheat’ with a man which you know is taken think twice.

Please...if you read this just give me your name. Nothing else will come of it. I promise.

http://www.imagehosting.com/out.php/i575258_ICONATOR9e406f650d95bdcc0578e03f64715d69.jpg​

Just in case someone figured out who is who I am not going to confirm anything.

 

[Sioux City Male]

I don't know you, I don't know him and I don't know her.
I still want to say,

"I'm sorry"

 

[_no_more_]

Thank you.

 

[Missingmeds]

Umm..this is just my personal opinion but if the people of Lit don't have a name of some kind to go by then they won't have a clue. She might not have a clue either. That does happen.

So if nothing else, give his screen name here at lit and maybe you will find what you looking for. Because otherwise, no one is going to know who you are talking about and your chances of her figuring it out are slim.

 

[ima6uldv8]

I'm so sorry for your pain. I hope you find the peace you need I too, give my all in relationships and it can sometimes be a fault instead of a plus.

 

[Guest]

I have to say something, and I have said it to close friends in the same position.

The reason there are so many predators out there (and no matter how much blame you place on HER... HE is just as much to blame, probably moreso), is that all people do is blurt and wail... but very seldom are people named. In fact with a vast majority of cases the women actually look at THEMSELVES and wonder what is wrong with THEM when they find out. Which is madness.

The guys who lie and cheat (I mean physically) never get repurussions beyond something like this, and that's why there are so many of them about... they must see these blurts never naming anyone and rub their hands with glee as they look for their prey.

And yes... same goes for the female ones.

(Think you mean 'closure')

 

[mrtnmoon]

I have to say something, and I have said it to close friends in the same position.

The reason there are so many predators out there (and no matter how much blame you place on HER... HE is just as much to blame, probably moreso), is that all people do is blurt and wail... but very seldom are people named. In fact with a vast majority of cases the women actually look at THEMSELVES and wonder what is wrong with THEM when they find out. Which is madness.

The guys who lie and cheat (I mean physically) never get repurussions beyond something like this, and that's why there are so many of them about... they must see these blurts never naming anyone and rub their hands with glee as they look for their prey.

And yes... same goes for the female ones.

(Think you mean 'closure')

there may be something to what you say, DB.... but then again, it may not matter. I think some people are just... I dunno, I guess attracted is as good a word as any... they're attracted to someone no matter what other people say or think about that person. I mean, there are people here, especially on the GB.... who, judging by their posts are some of the biggest assholes the world has ever seen. and yet, there are still women that flirt with them.

more than once it's made me wonder if I should start acting more like a dick, both online and in real life. must be that "bad boy" thing, I guess...

as for _no_more.... I'm sorry you had to go through the pain you did. unfortunately, as easy as it is for people to lie and manipulate someone in real life, it can be even easier on the net. in some ways it leads to people feeling more intimate more quickly, and easier to convince someone that they care about you, as a "friend" or even more.

 

[_no_more_]

I have to say something, and I have said it to close friends in the same position.

The reason there are so many predators out there (and no matter how much blame you place on HER... HE is just as much to blame, probably moreso), is that all people do is blurt and wail... but very seldom are people named. In fact with a vast majority of cases the women actually look at THEMSELVES and wonder what is wrong with THEM when they find out. Which is madness.

The guys who lie and cheat (I mean physically) never get repurussions beyond something like this, and that's why there are so many of them about... they must see these blurts never naming anyone and rub their hands with glee as they look for their prey.

And yes... same goes for the female ones.

(Think you mean 'closure')

I had it spelled that way originally but spell check told me I was wrong.

Thank you for your words. I blame him mostly. He allowed it to happen and put himself in that position. The fact that she knowingly went along with it says enough about her character. In this case the scarlet letter should be placed on him.

I wonder though what naming him will do. He seems to be pretty happy here on Lit. I seriously doubt if I let this public forum know what he did anything will change besides hurting him which might not even happen. I am not doing this for revenge.

The reason I want a name is so that I can put the final piece in the puzzle, take it apart and give it to the Salvation Army. Some one else can have him.

 

[INeedLove]

Closure is important. Is this the only way of getting closure for you? Maybe he won't come clean and she won't respond here. For your own piece of mind, you may need to find another way to close the book.

I can almost feel your pain in your post. Sorry you experienced the coldness of his treatment. I hope you can begin to heal soon.

Sometimes the online stuff is the worst! (I'm pretty certain my ex had an online affair too)

Take care!

 

[hdlynnette]

I had it spelled that way originally but spell check told me I was wrong.

Thank you for your words. I blame him mostly. He allowed it to happen and put himself in that position. The fact that she knowingly went along with it says enough about her character. In this case the scarlet letter should be placed on him.

I wonder though what naming him will do. He seems to be pretty happy here on Lit. I seriously doubt if I let this public forum know what he did anything will change besides hurting him which might not even happen. I am not doing this for revenge.

The reason I want a name is so that I can put the final piece in the puzzle, take it apart and give it to the Salvation Army. Some one else can have him.

Giving his name is totally up to you _no_more, but if he cheated on you, he will cheat on her. Perhaps by naming him, you can give his next potential 'victim' a heads up on how he operates.

I'm sorry you are/were hurt Hon, but let this life lesson make you stronger.