Richard49
The Gentleman Dom
- Joined
- Feb 27, 2002
- Posts
- 14,176
I know we have several thread about online stuff
Most of you know I have a LOW opinion of online relationships
anyway .. . this screamed posting so..........
http://www.rks-society.com/Horseman/chudwa.htm
It was April of 1994. There was no World Wide Web as we knew it. There was Usenet, however. There was alt.sex.bondage. (I won't include a hyperlink because it's all spam nowadays.) In those days, a.s.b was a virtual BDSM university--and for a young man who'd known about his interests but never had the opportunity to put them into words, it was great. And somewhere deep within the depths of a small college computer lab, a young man was angry. Angry at the clueless hordes who barraged his submissive (then his girlfriend, now his wife, always his brat.) With the anger of 21-year-old ardor, he wrote a post.
'To All Wannabe Het Male Doms' (the original, official title) was intended as nothing more than an angry flame. I wrote it originally for a gay/lesbian BBS that I had an account on. It's since gone the way of the dodo-bird--RIP, Multicom-4. I rewrote it for the Internet and posted it to alt.sex.bondage under an anon.penet.fi account. (Which has also gone the way of the dodo. Thanks for all the people you helped, Julf.)
At the time, there was a constant group on the net, who was mostly tolerant of gays, as well as the requisite homophobic posters who would pop in from time to time. You know, the 'all fagets must die' sort of thing. I noted that most of the chuds seemed to be heterosexual. Thus, the term. There are also gay chuds, as I have discovered after a short stint on AOL. (Hint to gay online bottoms everywhere: learn to spell 'dominate' and it'll be more likely to happen to you.)
The term itself derived from CHDW, and developed into chudwah. Sounds kind of scummy, reptilian, subhuman, which is the way a lot of those people actually make themselves look. That's why I think people like it. Also it became a net.thing. (On AOL, the term 'snert' has come into play now, which means the same thing.) Sir Stephen and the Story of O, I felt (and still feel) gave way too many people way the wrong idea about how most people practice BDSM. Of course, the porno magazines (HOM being mentioned because early on I had perused some of their stuff) feed a fantasy market that is completely unrelated to how people--at least those I know--practice BDSM. (Plus--please, guys--GET A SPELL CHECKER!)
The post struck a nerve in many female submissives and male doms. It received accolades. I began receiving emails from people asking if they could copy it. (To which I've always agreed--I put the damn thing on the net so people could read it.) BDSM groups. BDSM chatboards. The post has probably been read by gazillions more people than I ever imagined. Somehow or another, it's been archived, debated, and become a part of the a.s.b./s.s.b. canon of literature. I even discovered, a few months back, a debate on whether or not I would have included female chuds had there been more around at the time. Rather odd, really. (Incidentally, yeah, there ARE female chuds, there just weren't any on a.s.b at the time I wrote the post. I have Spoken. Nyah, nyah.)
So. Here's the post itself, unadulterated, unedited. Well, the paragraphs didn't carry over but that's Dreamweaver's fault. The careful reader may be able to discern a goof or two where I rewrote the post for the Internet instead of Multicom-4. It's the same post that hit alt.sex.bondage in April of 1994. Enjoy it, dear reader. I wrote it for you. And all the other real BDSM'ers--male, female, Top, bottom, switch, whatever--who've ever had to deal with some jerk cluttering up your email box (or ICQ, or Instant Messenger) with his/her/its unrequested masturbatory fantasies.
The_Horseman (in those days, an7053@anon.penet.fi: these days, horseman@rochester.rr.com)
(In my best old, dry, Professor's voice.)
The subspecies Homo sapiens chudwahensis has been known since the dawn of BDSM as we know it. It was named by yours truly in early 1994. Chudwah is the pronounced version of CHDW, an acronym for Clueless Het Dom Wannabe. Any resemblance to a particularly bad movie called C.H.U.D. (Cannabalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers) is completely unintentional. You can even ask the video rental clerks who rented me the movie several times when I was fourteen.
It seems that quite a few of the straights out there are wannabe doms. Quite a few of you contact any submissive female you find madly, and don't get anywhere. Well, I'm going to explain why this behavior doesn't get anywhere. Get mad if you will--but does the pestering technique work? No.
To begin with, Sir Stephen doesn't live here anymore. So you read the Story of O, and longed to be Sir Stephen. So you found the grotty magazines from HOM and enjoyed them a lot. Guess what? Forget everything those magazines and that book ever taught you about the dynamics of an S/M relationship. If you don't, you can forget about ever bringing any of your fantasies to reality.
You see, O is not your typical submissive. Nor is Sir Stephen your typical Master. Some submissives submit to *one* person, not to any clod who calls himself a dominant. Some submit to more than one, but I can assure you that a Master *must*prove himself to a submissive before she will become his slave. Yes, it's awfully fun to fantasize a world in which a Master will lend out his slave to you, but it ain't gonna happen. Masters spend quite a bit of time developing trust in their slaves; they most assuredly will not lend them out and abuse that trust to the first person who asks. If you worked for years to buy a Ferrari, or a large house, would you lend the car or the house out to someone you didn't know, simply because they asked? Yet someone asked my slave if I would give him permission to use my slave. Guess what the answer was? Too many wannabe doms seem to think that merely because they call themselves 'doms', they are entitled to some sort of respect from a female submissive. This doesn't happen to be the case. You see,submissives are *people*, first and foremost. Someone else told my slave she was snotty because she did not want to view a .gif of him. Never did he consider that maybe she didn't have time, maybe she had other things she wanted to do--no, he was a Dom, by God, and she was a submissive, and she didn't show him respect, so she was a snot, by gum. Do you know what slaves and their Masters think of people like this? They*laugh* at them. "Clueless", "dweeb", and "asshole" are the words which spring to mind when these people's names are mentioned. And ya see, you just can't use a slave for your own pleasure. Not without their consent, anyway--it doesn't work that way. If you want to be a dom, fine. Just look in your mirror, stare at your own face, and say, "What is it about me that someone should let me own them, beat them, and place their very *LIFE* in my hands?" If a person is so immature that they are going to childishly insult someone else for not being 'respectful' enough to them, why in hell any sane Master would have anything to do with them, or why any sane slave would consent to let that person do anything to them, is beyond me. Following in this thread, if you pull up someone's bio and see that they are female, submissive, and attached, respect that. Again, if you can't respect a person's choice of monogamy, why should they even consider you? Being a Master is most certainly not about having all our own selfish pleasures met and giving nothing in return. If that's what you're after, you're going to be sticking to the Story of O, HOM magazines, movies, and a jar of hand cream and your hand for your fantasies. BDSM relationships take work too--if you think a BDSM relationship is the easy way out, you're wrong. Dead wrong.
Now, you see, there are loads and loads and loads of wannabe het male Doms out there. Even if you happen to find an unattached female submissive over the computer, be assured you are going to be one of hundreds of applicants. She's going to be getting unrequested contact all the time. So you've got to *prove* yourself first to get her to want to talk to you. Asking if she enjoys being a slave, or whatever, is likely to get your name shoved real quickly in the 'clueless' file. Asking her to describe what she likes being done to her is an even quicker route., If it's jerk-off material you want, go buy a magazine. Or look in alt.sex.stories. It's extremely insulting to a person to be asked to do this by a total stranger. And if you think that gambit isn't going to be noticed, you're wrong. Submissives ain't stupid. In fact, most are going to be able to see what you want real quick. And horrors, she may not want totalk to you. If you don't get a response, don't continue madly until you get one--you may have gotten a response, but I guarantee that you'll have added the tag 'clueless geek' to your name in her mind. And that'sreally hard to remove. If you're asked to stop, stop. You see, there *is* such a thing as harassment. It's as easy for her to write your sysadmin as it is for you to write her. Claiming that 'it was all ficticious and she made it all up' probably won't work, since people don't randomly complain about other random people. If copies of your masterly demands are attached, you're sunk. Depending on the sysadmin, you might lose net access. Or email access. Or something you probably won't like. Nor will the 'She was rude to me, and I'm a Dom, I deserve respect' bit, either in the vanilla or organized BDSM communities. Is it fair? Not always. But Life isn't fair, and no one ever promised you a slave.
Most of you know I have a LOW opinion of online relationships
anyway .. . this screamed posting so..........
http://www.rks-society.com/Horseman/chudwa.htm
It was April of 1994. There was no World Wide Web as we knew it. There was Usenet, however. There was alt.sex.bondage. (I won't include a hyperlink because it's all spam nowadays.) In those days, a.s.b was a virtual BDSM university--and for a young man who'd known about his interests but never had the opportunity to put them into words, it was great. And somewhere deep within the depths of a small college computer lab, a young man was angry. Angry at the clueless hordes who barraged his submissive (then his girlfriend, now his wife, always his brat.) With the anger of 21-year-old ardor, he wrote a post.
'To All Wannabe Het Male Doms' (the original, official title) was intended as nothing more than an angry flame. I wrote it originally for a gay/lesbian BBS that I had an account on. It's since gone the way of the dodo-bird--RIP, Multicom-4. I rewrote it for the Internet and posted it to alt.sex.bondage under an anon.penet.fi account. (Which has also gone the way of the dodo. Thanks for all the people you helped, Julf.)
At the time, there was a constant group on the net, who was mostly tolerant of gays, as well as the requisite homophobic posters who would pop in from time to time. You know, the 'all fagets must die' sort of thing. I noted that most of the chuds seemed to be heterosexual. Thus, the term. There are also gay chuds, as I have discovered after a short stint on AOL. (Hint to gay online bottoms everywhere: learn to spell 'dominate' and it'll be more likely to happen to you.)
The term itself derived from CHDW, and developed into chudwah. Sounds kind of scummy, reptilian, subhuman, which is the way a lot of those people actually make themselves look. That's why I think people like it. Also it became a net.thing. (On AOL, the term 'snert' has come into play now, which means the same thing.) Sir Stephen and the Story of O, I felt (and still feel) gave way too many people way the wrong idea about how most people practice BDSM. Of course, the porno magazines (HOM being mentioned because early on I had perused some of their stuff) feed a fantasy market that is completely unrelated to how people--at least those I know--practice BDSM. (Plus--please, guys--GET A SPELL CHECKER!)
The post struck a nerve in many female submissives and male doms. It received accolades. I began receiving emails from people asking if they could copy it. (To which I've always agreed--I put the damn thing on the net so people could read it.) BDSM groups. BDSM chatboards. The post has probably been read by gazillions more people than I ever imagined. Somehow or another, it's been archived, debated, and become a part of the a.s.b./s.s.b. canon of literature. I even discovered, a few months back, a debate on whether or not I would have included female chuds had there been more around at the time. Rather odd, really. (Incidentally, yeah, there ARE female chuds, there just weren't any on a.s.b at the time I wrote the post. I have Spoken. Nyah, nyah.)
So. Here's the post itself, unadulterated, unedited. Well, the paragraphs didn't carry over but that's Dreamweaver's fault. The careful reader may be able to discern a goof or two where I rewrote the post for the Internet instead of Multicom-4. It's the same post that hit alt.sex.bondage in April of 1994. Enjoy it, dear reader. I wrote it for you. And all the other real BDSM'ers--male, female, Top, bottom, switch, whatever--who've ever had to deal with some jerk cluttering up your email box (or ICQ, or Instant Messenger) with his/her/its unrequested masturbatory fantasies.
The_Horseman (in those days, an7053@anon.penet.fi: these days, horseman@rochester.rr.com)
(In my best old, dry, Professor's voice.)
The subspecies Homo sapiens chudwahensis has been known since the dawn of BDSM as we know it. It was named by yours truly in early 1994. Chudwah is the pronounced version of CHDW, an acronym for Clueless Het Dom Wannabe. Any resemblance to a particularly bad movie called C.H.U.D. (Cannabalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers) is completely unintentional. You can even ask the video rental clerks who rented me the movie several times when I was fourteen.
It seems that quite a few of the straights out there are wannabe doms. Quite a few of you contact any submissive female you find madly, and don't get anywhere. Well, I'm going to explain why this behavior doesn't get anywhere. Get mad if you will--but does the pestering technique work? No.
To begin with, Sir Stephen doesn't live here anymore. So you read the Story of O, and longed to be Sir Stephen. So you found the grotty magazines from HOM and enjoyed them a lot. Guess what? Forget everything those magazines and that book ever taught you about the dynamics of an S/M relationship. If you don't, you can forget about ever bringing any of your fantasies to reality.
You see, O is not your typical submissive. Nor is Sir Stephen your typical Master. Some submissives submit to *one* person, not to any clod who calls himself a dominant. Some submit to more than one, but I can assure you that a Master *must*prove himself to a submissive before she will become his slave. Yes, it's awfully fun to fantasize a world in which a Master will lend out his slave to you, but it ain't gonna happen. Masters spend quite a bit of time developing trust in their slaves; they most assuredly will not lend them out and abuse that trust to the first person who asks. If you worked for years to buy a Ferrari, or a large house, would you lend the car or the house out to someone you didn't know, simply because they asked? Yet someone asked my slave if I would give him permission to use my slave. Guess what the answer was? Too many wannabe doms seem to think that merely because they call themselves 'doms', they are entitled to some sort of respect from a female submissive. This doesn't happen to be the case. You see,submissives are *people*, first and foremost. Someone else told my slave she was snotty because she did not want to view a .gif of him. Never did he consider that maybe she didn't have time, maybe she had other things she wanted to do--no, he was a Dom, by God, and she was a submissive, and she didn't show him respect, so she was a snot, by gum. Do you know what slaves and their Masters think of people like this? They*laugh* at them. "Clueless", "dweeb", and "asshole" are the words which spring to mind when these people's names are mentioned. And ya see, you just can't use a slave for your own pleasure. Not without their consent, anyway--it doesn't work that way. If you want to be a dom, fine. Just look in your mirror, stare at your own face, and say, "What is it about me that someone should let me own them, beat them, and place their very *LIFE* in my hands?" If a person is so immature that they are going to childishly insult someone else for not being 'respectful' enough to them, why in hell any sane Master would have anything to do with them, or why any sane slave would consent to let that person do anything to them, is beyond me. Following in this thread, if you pull up someone's bio and see that they are female, submissive, and attached, respect that. Again, if you can't respect a person's choice of monogamy, why should they even consider you? Being a Master is most certainly not about having all our own selfish pleasures met and giving nothing in return. If that's what you're after, you're going to be sticking to the Story of O, HOM magazines, movies, and a jar of hand cream and your hand for your fantasies. BDSM relationships take work too--if you think a BDSM relationship is the easy way out, you're wrong. Dead wrong.
Now, you see, there are loads and loads and loads of wannabe het male Doms out there. Even if you happen to find an unattached female submissive over the computer, be assured you are going to be one of hundreds of applicants. She's going to be getting unrequested contact all the time. So you've got to *prove* yourself first to get her to want to talk to you. Asking if she enjoys being a slave, or whatever, is likely to get your name shoved real quickly in the 'clueless' file. Asking her to describe what she likes being done to her is an even quicker route., If it's jerk-off material you want, go buy a magazine. Or look in alt.sex.stories. It's extremely insulting to a person to be asked to do this by a total stranger. And if you think that gambit isn't going to be noticed, you're wrong. Submissives ain't stupid. In fact, most are going to be able to see what you want real quick. And horrors, she may not want totalk to you. If you don't get a response, don't continue madly until you get one--you may have gotten a response, but I guarantee that you'll have added the tag 'clueless geek' to your name in her mind. And that'sreally hard to remove. If you're asked to stop, stop. You see, there *is* such a thing as harassment. It's as easy for her to write your sysadmin as it is for you to write her. Claiming that 'it was all ficticious and she made it all up' probably won't work, since people don't randomly complain about other random people. If copies of your masterly demands are attached, you're sunk. Depending on the sysadmin, you might lose net access. Or email access. Or something you probably won't like. Nor will the 'She was rude to me, and I'm a Dom, I deserve respect' bit, either in the vanilla or organized BDSM communities. Is it fair? Not always. But Life isn't fair, and no one ever promised you a slave.
