A little seasonal story by Miltone and yours truly, hope folks will read along and enjoy...
Amanda
Amanda sat up and sneezed. “Arrrrr…. Oh hell…” she sneezed again, dust flying from her hair, forming a hazy halo round her head.
“Bless you and watch the language,” A voice said behind her.
“Sorry,” Amanda sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve, inhaling another layer of dust as she did so… “Oh God……..” She broke out in a fit of sneezing that almost blew her out of the crypt.
“I said watch the language,” The voice repeated as the owner walked round into Amanda’s line of vision, which was slightly watery, from her streaming eyes.
“I said I was sorry,” Amanda huffed and swung her legs over the side of the open marble tomb, she was lying on top of. “But you would think they would clean this place.” She looked at the cold damp floor and wrinkled her toes, they cracked. “Help, I think I have arthritis!”
The figure shook his head, his mane of white hair flowing out round his shoulders. “Apology accepted. It is the inside 1920's crypt, under the south west corner of St Mary’s, I don’t think it is high on the cleaning list. You are dead, have been for over eighty years, you can’t get arthritis.”
“I am not dead now, it is the first of December, sooooo. I am very much alive,” Amanda glared at the Angel.
“Yes it is; how on earth did you get chosen as a Christmas spirit? Especially of an area so in need as this?” The angel shook his head again and sighed.
“Looks, personality, because no other bugger was fool enough to put up their hand?” Amanda pulled at her clothes, twelve months of dust, mice droppings and dead beetles made for a lovely coating.
“We do not trick the lately departed into becoming bastions of help at this time of love and renewal.” The Angel’s back was up now, but so was Amanda’s
“No you just tempt them with the offer of being alive again from the 1st December till twelfth night.” Amanda finally decided to put her feet on the slimy floor and stood, bringing herself up to her full 5 ft and glaring into the Angel’s countenance.
“We are servants of the Lord, we do not tempt, we allow a helpful soul the chance to continue their work; we offer a just reward for...”
“Got you…I must have been good.” Amanda winked one of her bright blue eyes at him.
“Damn you!” The Angel swore and burst out laughing.
“Language please, “Amanda admonished.
“Yes well, it is nearly 1.00am on the 1st, you best get going.”
“Like this?” Amanda protested.
“All is prepared, go to number 3457a Broad Crown Street.” The angel commanded.
“That’s half way across town.” Amanda blurted.
“The number 17 bus goes right across at this time of night; you won’t be out of place on it. If you hurry you will catch it.” The Angel pressed two coins into her hand.
“You mean it will be full of bums, drop outs and bag ladies? And where did you get the money?” Amanda asked as the Angel began to fade.
The answer floated back. “From off your eyes.”
“Right off my eyes…” Amanda sighed and pulled the party streamers from round her neck. She had been at a party on the 6th January last year, always tried too be at a party or in a good Weepie Film on the last night. It helped or sort of did; anyway there was always some loose end to tie up at last minute. She glanced at the faded rose that had fallen from her hand as she had got up. She bent to pick it up then heard the rumble of a diesel engine “Hell, the bus.” She picked up the hem of her long evening gown and belted up the steps of the crypt and out of the church, just reaching the bus stop outside as the vehicle hissed to a stop.
“Where too?” The driver asked from behind his glass screen.
“Broad Crown Street,” Amanda said sneezed and powdered the bus with dust and mouse droppings.
“Right, errr…”The driver hesitated as he pushed her ticket towards her through the slit. “Where you been?” The question dropped into the nearly empty bus like a stone down a well.
“Halloween Party, late one…” Amanda said, taking her ticket and walking up the bus to her seat.
“What?” Ask a stupid bloody question.” The driver muttered and fiddled with his clip board. It was at that moment a car came fast round the corner, on the wrong side of the road, ploughed into a line of bins and hit a lamppost. The occupants got out and ran as the sound of police sirens sounded.
“Well, well,” Amanda commented “If you hadn’t of stopped for me; you would have hit them full on coming round that corner.”
“Aye… Damn me; bit of luck there.” The Driver said as he shook his head and started the bus, pulling off.
Amanda arrived at Broad Crown Street with nothing else happening, well nothing she could pin to her being around. She mounted the steps of the building looking at the number. 3457, right, she went to the next that was 3458. Ok she thought, where is 3457a. She peered down the narrow alley between the two properties and sighed. Down she walked and there was a small door with peeling paintwork in the side of 3457 with a very festive wreath on the door, looking very out of place.
Amanda placed her hand on the door knob and the door sprang open.
“Oh well,” she said. “Here we go for another year. Best get cleaned up and off down town see what has happened in the last twelve months or not as the case maybe…”
Amanda
Amanda sat up and sneezed. “Arrrrr…. Oh hell…” she sneezed again, dust flying from her hair, forming a hazy halo round her head.
“Bless you and watch the language,” A voice said behind her.
“Sorry,” Amanda sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve, inhaling another layer of dust as she did so… “Oh God……..” She broke out in a fit of sneezing that almost blew her out of the crypt.
“I said watch the language,” The voice repeated as the owner walked round into Amanda’s line of vision, which was slightly watery, from her streaming eyes.
“I said I was sorry,” Amanda huffed and swung her legs over the side of the open marble tomb, she was lying on top of. “But you would think they would clean this place.” She looked at the cold damp floor and wrinkled her toes, they cracked. “Help, I think I have arthritis!”
The figure shook his head, his mane of white hair flowing out round his shoulders. “Apology accepted. It is the inside 1920's crypt, under the south west corner of St Mary’s, I don’t think it is high on the cleaning list. You are dead, have been for over eighty years, you can’t get arthritis.”
“I am not dead now, it is the first of December, sooooo. I am very much alive,” Amanda glared at the Angel.
“Yes it is; how on earth did you get chosen as a Christmas spirit? Especially of an area so in need as this?” The angel shook his head again and sighed.
“Looks, personality, because no other bugger was fool enough to put up their hand?” Amanda pulled at her clothes, twelve months of dust, mice droppings and dead beetles made for a lovely coating.
“We do not trick the lately departed into becoming bastions of help at this time of love and renewal.” The Angel’s back was up now, but so was Amanda’s
“No you just tempt them with the offer of being alive again from the 1st December till twelfth night.” Amanda finally decided to put her feet on the slimy floor and stood, bringing herself up to her full 5 ft and glaring into the Angel’s countenance.
“We are servants of the Lord, we do not tempt, we allow a helpful soul the chance to continue their work; we offer a just reward for...”
“Got you…I must have been good.” Amanda winked one of her bright blue eyes at him.
“Damn you!” The Angel swore and burst out laughing.
“Language please, “Amanda admonished.
“Yes well, it is nearly 1.00am on the 1st, you best get going.”
“Like this?” Amanda protested.
“All is prepared, go to number 3457a Broad Crown Street.” The angel commanded.
“That’s half way across town.” Amanda blurted.
“The number 17 bus goes right across at this time of night; you won’t be out of place on it. If you hurry you will catch it.” The Angel pressed two coins into her hand.
“You mean it will be full of bums, drop outs and bag ladies? And where did you get the money?” Amanda asked as the Angel began to fade.
The answer floated back. “From off your eyes.”
“Right off my eyes…” Amanda sighed and pulled the party streamers from round her neck. She had been at a party on the 6th January last year, always tried too be at a party or in a good Weepie Film on the last night. It helped or sort of did; anyway there was always some loose end to tie up at last minute. She glanced at the faded rose that had fallen from her hand as she had got up. She bent to pick it up then heard the rumble of a diesel engine “Hell, the bus.” She picked up the hem of her long evening gown and belted up the steps of the crypt and out of the church, just reaching the bus stop outside as the vehicle hissed to a stop.
“Where too?” The driver asked from behind his glass screen.
“Broad Crown Street,” Amanda said sneezed and powdered the bus with dust and mouse droppings.
“Right, errr…”The driver hesitated as he pushed her ticket towards her through the slit. “Where you been?” The question dropped into the nearly empty bus like a stone down a well.
“Halloween Party, late one…” Amanda said, taking her ticket and walking up the bus to her seat.
“What?” Ask a stupid bloody question.” The driver muttered and fiddled with his clip board. It was at that moment a car came fast round the corner, on the wrong side of the road, ploughed into a line of bins and hit a lamppost. The occupants got out and ran as the sound of police sirens sounded.
“Well, well,” Amanda commented “If you hadn’t of stopped for me; you would have hit them full on coming round that corner.”
“Aye… Damn me; bit of luck there.” The Driver said as he shook his head and started the bus, pulling off.
Amanda arrived at Broad Crown Street with nothing else happening, well nothing she could pin to her being around. She mounted the steps of the building looking at the number. 3457, right, she went to the next that was 3458. Ok she thought, where is 3457a. She peered down the narrow alley between the two properties and sighed. Down she walked and there was a small door with peeling paintwork in the side of 3457 with a very festive wreath on the door, looking very out of place.
Amanda placed her hand on the door knob and the door sprang open.
“Oh well,” she said. “Here we go for another year. Best get cleaned up and off down town see what has happened in the last twelve months or not as the case maybe…”
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